Chapter 19

A million emotions flooded through me—none of them good.

Fear as I hadn’t felt it in years, confusion, shock, my mouth hung open, and I quickly closed it. I didn’t know the right response; I couldn’t think of any response.

Was he accusing me? He was, but how did he know? I didn’t know how best to react, so I settled into what I knew, hiding behind the mask I created felt oddly settling.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, my voice shaky, but I didn’t have to fake it. You’re not supposed to be here.” I pulled the blanket tighter around me.

He didn’t say anything for a too long moment; the silence was a weight in the room. The only sound was my heartbeat in my ears and his heavy, even breathing. I knew he did that for my benefit; for the show, he could be as silent as he wanted.

“You should leave,” I tried again. “If you’re found here—”

“I won’t be. No one is coming to check on you. Alice is fast asleep.”

How did he know about Alice? “How did you—”

“It’s my job,” he responded. His harsh voice made my stomach churn.

I felt like a child getting scolded. I was thankful he couldn’t see the heat rush to my cheeks, but part of me thought that he might be able to see through the darkness as if it were daylight.

“You’re not very good at it,” I mumbled.

“No?”

He turned his head to me, and the flames danced off his face. His harsh yet beautiful features were bathed in warmth even though his face held nothing but coldness.

“You broke into a room that wasn’t even locked to accuse me of Goddess knows what.” I shrugged. “I would say you found the wrong room.”

“I knew this room was yours. I’ve been here before, remember?” He quirked a brow, but I knew he was anything but amused.

Fuck.

I curled in on myself and asked quietly, “What do you want from me?”

“You know.”

I shook my head violently. “Just tell me and leave. I’ll… I’ll be in trouble if you’re found here.” I hung my head.

I heard him land on the ground, softer than I thought to be possible. I watched his black boots walk up, bathed in the warm glow of the cracking fire. He dropped a sprig of dried Juniper on the bed. I internally winced.

“A gardener,” he stated.

“I like making bouquets. The Luna likes them,” I mumbled. “Is there something wrong with that?” I forced myself to look up into his eyes, tilting my head.

“You don’t know what that is?” He asked and pointed to the plant I had poisoned him with.

I shrugged, glancing at it. “It’s pretty,” I responded.

He narrowed his eyes, and he stood tall. I was surprised when he turned and started walking towards my door.

“Where are you going?” I asked. Fear laced my voice.

If he told the Alpha, what would happen? Would he even believe him?

I didn’t have an escape plan, nothing packed, no money, and no direction of where I could go. But did it even matter? I didn’t want a new life; I wanted the ones who made mine a living hell dead.

The Hunter paused, glancing back at me. “To bed,” he stated.

“I don’t believe you,” I whispered.

“You don’t have to. I don’t believe you either.”

I waited for long moments after he closed the door, holding my breath, but he didn’t return. I hastily packed a few belongings in a too-small bag. There wasn’t any luggage in this room; there wouldn’t need to be. I shoved it back in the closet and tugged on some pants under my dressing gown, tying my hair up in a tight braid.

I knew I couldn’t run—and more than that, I knew I wouldn’t. I would play this game with the new rules, whatever they might be. I had played a game for far too long to back out now.

I slept fitfully and dressed early, waiting until the swell of feet passed my door to leave, not bothering to wait on Alice.

Cold sweat clung to me, and I was grateful for the heavy, thick fabric of these idiotic dresses. I forced myself forward, walking to the dining hall. I paused outside the doors. I knew I was earlier than I usually was, but I had to feel at least like I was doing something like The Hunter hadn’t become the master of my fate with those few words.

I pushed open the thick wooden doors. Were they always that creaky? I felt like all eyes snapped to me even though it was only a few Omegas setting up and doing last-minute checks. Everyone went back to their work, relaxing when they saw it was only me. Not a threat to anyone.

That might change once The Hunter told Alpha Raymond what he suspected. I doubted he would believe him; The Alpha found it hard to believe anything that he didn’t want to. But it might severely limit my opportunities. I suppressed a shudder thinking of that time of isolation in my room; I couldn’t go back to that. I wouldn’t.

I took my seat and waited for the others, gratefully accepting a cup of tea so that I could focus on something other than scanning the same room over and over and trying to quiet my thundering heart.

Finally, Luna Addison emerged through the open doors, and I jumped. If she noticed, didn’t say anything. Alpha Raymond came shortly after and demanded food immediately, which Luna Addison let go for once, even though the nightmare brothers weren’t down yet.

Nolan, Hudson, and Dominick showed up when we were halfway through our meal. They looked exhausted, but their eyes were bright. I recognized that look from my memories. It was that satisfied feeling you got after a particularly challenging training session. Their exhaustion and soreness would work in my favor; I just hoped they weren’t improving too much. I would have to monitor their progress, that is, if today wouldn’t be my last of freedom.

No one spoke to me; they barely spoke to each other. When Alpha Raymond stood and left, something in me loosened. But a heavy confusion lingered. Did The Hunter not tell the Alpha? Or was the Alpha waiting for more evidence to trap me with?

I made my way to the pack library, just for something to do. My room felt too small today. Every part of me protested against my steps to the stuffy room. I wanted to follow The Alpha to see what he knew, but I couldn’t risk getting caught, not today.

The library was a large room, hardly used. Filled with stacks of books I knew no one bothered reading. It would have been a comforting place if it was anywhere else, but it always unsettled me. It reminded me too much of home—specifically my Dad’s office. His office was cluttered and filled with treasures, where everything had a tale. I smiled despite myself remembering him sitting across his deep mahogany desk, a fire crackling behind him as he would patiently answer all my questions, but that memory caused a ripple of pain lancing through me.

I wondered if there would ever be a time when the memories weren’t accompanied by hurt and rage. I pushed the anger away, saving it for later, and stepped into the room.

I avoided the library unless I wanted to research something, but it was rarely much help. There didn’t seem to be a system, and no one tended to it besides an occasional clean. Another space left because the ranked members weren’t using it.

I stopped by a faded tapestry that I used to brush past. Even with its dulled colors, I knew what the red represented—blood.

Something I saw too much of, even before I spilled it with my own hands.

The tapestry depicted a battle, wolves against cats. I knew I had heard something about Black River being built on stolen lands, but something else tugged at my memory now that the lands might have been stolen from werecats. I couldn’t remember if it was a memory from a lifetime passed or a rumor, but this tapestry seemed to confirm a battle, at least.

I did actually remember hearing in Blood Moon’s history that our territories used to border the werecats until Black River stole land from them and claimed it as their own.

With that kind of history, it wasn’t surprising that their descendants turned out to be as odious and entitled as they were. Ancient history, either way and no way of telling what was the whole truth, history was colored with hate and bias.

I meandered to the middle of the space, where the tall shelves gave way to a stone fireplace and old chairs that might have been comfortable once. I grabbed a book, not caring what it was, and lit the fire. I absentimnedly flipped through the pages for something to quiet my mind while I processed and planned.

I sensed him before I saw him. There was a quiet shift in the air. I didn’t expect him to seek me out today, but it was welcomed. Anything was better than being in the dark.

“You didn’t tell them?” I asked, not looking up from my book.