Chapter 69 Get out
>>Amara
There was a devastated expression on his face and I sort of felt bad. Seeing him like that made me feel sorrowful as well.
I moved my hands in his to give him a hint and he got it, "Oh," He let my hands go and I organized my thoughts in my head, "Sorry," He took a step back, "I should let you speak." His voice was gentle and it pained me to tell him what I was about to tell him.
But, I also knew that we weren't meant for each other.
I shook my head at him, 'This must be a mistake,' I said, 'There's no way you and I could be a fated pair...' I looked at him and watched as his expressions slowly faded from anticipation to sorrow. He kept staring at my hands with a confused look as if what I said didn't make any sense, while my emotions swirled like a turbulent storm and shock coursed through my veins. I was hurting myself and my wolf.
"What?" He raised his gaze and looked at my face with a broken expression, only to repeat the word, "W-what?" It looked as if a deep sense of sadness and disappointment washed over his soul. He shook his head, "What- No," He looked at me with a frown, "How can you even say that this is a mistake?" Confusion tangled with the pain, as he desperately tried to make sense of what had transpired.
I didn't like it either, it felt like my heart was being squeezed.
'Because we're too different,' I said, 'We're not a match,' I signed my words slowly so that he wouldn't misunderstand anything, 'This all is a mistake.'
He shook his head, "The Moon Goddess makes no mistakes." He said.
"That's just what we're taught as kids.' I shook my head, 'For all we know the Moon Goddess might not even be a real thing.' I took a step back. Grief consumed me, aching in my chest as my wolf grieved not only the loss of affection but also the shattered dreams and hopes.
As kids, we were taught in schools that our wolves crave the affection of mates, and for a wolf to find a fated pair means to find bliss. And by rejecting it, I was shattering myself.
"So what?" He said, "You can't deny the feeling between us." He looked into my eyes and it made my heart tremble, so I looked away, "Hey!" He stepped towards me and grabbed my face, making me look at him, "You can't deny the bond between us." I looked back at him feeling a little scared now, "Don't you feel the connection?" He looked at me and I saw the desperation mixed with hope in his eyes, "Tell me you do," As he poured his heart out, baring his vulnerability and expressing his concern, a flicker of hope danced in his eyes.
I gulped.
If I want to end it, I should just deny it, right? If I say I don't feel anything, it should get him to back off. Right?
I pulled my face away from him and braced myself.
'No,' His gaze immediately went down to my hands, 'I don't feel anything for you,' His eyes went wide at my words, 'There is no such thing as a mate bond.' My wolf howled in pain, 'So whatever you were feeling is just delusion.' I saw his pupils shake, 'Let's not meet again.' It felt as though my world had crumbled in an instant, leaving me adrift in a sea of uncertainty and heartache.
My wolf cried in my mind, cursing me for what I was doing and it was making my chest heavy. Is this really how painful it's supposed to be?
Killian stood there in dismay and I tried to move away when he spoke again.
"Is there someone else you like?" I glanced at him and he looked angry, "Is it that femboy who hangs out with you!!?" He was devastated just a second ago but now he looked like he was burning with rage. I tried to get away without answering him but he caught my wrist and pulled me, "Answer me!!" He yelled, scaring the shit out of me since he yelled near my ear, "Is it because of that fag!!?" His words hurt me.
But as he pulled me towards himself, I slapped him out of anger and confusion, which made him let go of my wrist, 'He's a very important friend!' Tears dropped down my cheeks and he froze. I don't know why I started crying. Because he disrespected my only friend? Or because I was trying to run away from our bond? Or because he just scared me?
"Wait-" He stepped towards, "I'm sorry,"
'I hate you!' I moved towards the door, 'You raised your voice at me,' I looked at him in devastation, 'You can do it, you can even yell at me but I can't!' I grabbed the doorknob and opened the door, 'This is why I said it's a mistake. You and I are too different to be mates.'
I was about to leave through the door when it slammed shut again
!!!
I looked up and noticed his hand on the door, then I slowly turned my head to look at him. His features were hardened, his brows furrowed, and an unmistakable anger seemed to simmer just beneath the surface.
The hurt and frustration were evident in his eyes, and his body language betrayed his inner turmoil. A mix of disappointment and indignation fueled his anger, "I said," His voice was low, "It isn't a mistake."
I looked back at him in fear.
The anger radiated from him, his jaw clenched and his muscles tensed, "You said I'm being delusional?" It was as if his genuine expression of emotions had been met with callous disregard, intensifying his anger, "You said there's no such thing as a mate bond?" His gaze on me was so intense it made my skin stand up, "Fine then," His gaze, once filled with warmth and affection, turned piercing and intense, "Let me see how far you can deny it." All the while I couldn't move and then he cupped my face out of the blue and crashed his lips on me.
!!!
The softness of his lips against mine conveyed a tenderness that spoke directly to my heart. Every brush and caress, delicate and intentional, sent shivers of pleasure and tenderness throughout my entire being. It was a kiss that awakened a depth of emotion, a tangible expression that I didn't want to know.
He moved his lips on mine that were quivering and when he licked them, I felt my wolf finally relax. She was betraying me and started to enjoy his touch. He forced my mouth open, invading the wet inside. I felt dizzy all of the sudden, there was a sweet scent coming from him, the scent of mint, and it was quite lovely.
My body trembled the more Killian moved in my mouth. I was feeling something weird and I felt like the more he kissed me the more it aroused a soft and itchy craving out of me. It was making me want to kiss him back, to touch him, to let him go even further and claim me. It was something I didn't want to feel because I knew if I got the taste of it once I'll always want it.
NO!
I can't let this happen! I can't end up like Mom!!
I opened my eyes as I tried to deny the strong attraction between us. My heart was pounding in my chest, all of me was loving it but only the rational part of my brain knew this would only end up with me in pain
So, I fought to regain control over my emotions, but it wasn't working and as the seconds passed I found myself melting into his touch.
NO!
There was a final warning that my brain sent me and I moved my leg. I didn't even think it through, I just kicked his groin hard making him stop.
"OAhhhh!!" He let out a painful groan and let me go, "OH GOD!" He bent over to grab his private part. I looked at him and he looked like he was in a lot of pain and though it made me feel bad, I still took the opportunity to escape the room and run away.
\--Author's Bullshit
My friend believes Killian deserves all the beating he gets. One hundred percent.