Cara's pov
"Cara? What are you…" Diana trailed off, eyeing my shivering form and slung duffel bag.
"Can I come in? It's freezing out here."
She stepped away from her apartment door so I could come in. I hurried inside, heaving a deep sigh at the instant warmth of the place.
"What's going on? Why are you here? Is that tears on your cheek? Did you cry?"
The girl was ever concerned. I took in her silk night robe, instantly hit with the guilt of waking her up from sleep.
"Could I get a glass of water first? I'm thirsty as fuck."
Diana hesitated for a brief second before shaking off her bewilderment. "Oh… sure. Um… make yourself comfortable in the living room while I fetch you the glass."
"Thank you, Dee." I said after her.
I got comfy in her cozy living room, taking in the feminine space. Diana was the pink aesthetic type of girl and I could tell she was obsessed with succulents from the many cute cacti pots decorating her shelves, coffee table and window sill.
There were wall arts of random things but the one that caught my attention was a basic painting of a city view and it instantly reminded me of the view from Luca's bedroom window and the times we'd watch it in silence while he held me tight against him.
I bit out a curse as my eyes began tearing up again. It was a wonder how I could still cry at this point, I've cried more than most people did in their entire life just today. All I'd done on the cab ride here was cry and I was really sick of it. Luca Salvatore didn't deserve my tears.
I felt disgusted with myself at how hard I'd found it to leave him, spending more than necessary watching his peacefully sleeping form and almost missing the opportunity. I'd even stupidly thought about leaving him a goodbye note.
I scoffed inwardly at the memory, I really needed to kill this love I had for him. It made me think as well as do corny shit. The man had broken my heart, he didn't deserve any fucking note.
Trying to sneak the pills I'd found in his drawer on my short delay to our shower sex into the wine I had poured out had been an extreme sport. Looking for my bag after that had almost been impossible. I literally had to sneak into the CCTV unit to find out where Luca hid it. I really didn't expect to see him lock it away in a cabinet in the laundry room.
The man sure had a tendency to go overboard.
I should stop thinking about him. I left him and that was all that matters. No more false hopes that lead to heartaches, no more tears. The first step in ensuring this was to completely erase him from my thoughts.
Even if it was easier said than done.
Diana returned but without my glass of water instead, she had four bottles of beer hooked between her fingers.
"I figured you needed this more." She said as she dropped the bottles on the coffee table and joined me on her pink suede couch.
Gosh, it was such a blessing to have her in my life. I immediately reached for a bottle. "You're a gem."
She smiled softly at me, watching with worry as I deftly uncorked a bottle and took a long swig.
She decided I've had enough by seizing my bottle after my eight gulp. "Cara, what the hell happened?"
I reached for the bottle again but she pulled it out of my grasp. I sighed. "I'm homeless Diana."
Her eyes darkened with an equal mix of puzzlement and concern. "What? How? I thought that was settled."
I stared longingly at the confiscated beer. "Apparently it was not."
"Why?"
"Let's just say, it was put off for a while." I muttered sardonically. My gaze raised to hers. "But now, reality has set in. I was stupid to have put it off, I should not have let it fester. What I should have done instead was put an end to it as soon as the problem arose. But no, like a fool, I'd let the problem accumulate and grow bigger." l let out a hollow laugh. "Look at me now."
Diana's face scrunched up in confusion but I couldn't find it in me to clarify. I had no idea what I was saying either.
Damn, was the beer already taking effect? So early? Or was my post heartbreak manic episode already making its delayed entrance.
Diana's eyes lit up as intuition kicked in. "Are we still talking about your apartment woes?"
"I guess not."
She pushed my beer back to me, understanding dawning on her face. "Do you want to talk about it?"
A traitorous tear sneaked down my cheek. I sniffled, my smile was barely there. "Is it okay if I don't want to?"
Diana popped open a bottle. "Yes, baby, it's okay."
"You're the best."
Diana flipped her honey brown hair. "Believe me, I know."
We shared a laugh before she got serious again.
"You can stay for as long as it takes you to find a new apartment. I have a spare room you can use. As long as you flush after you and promise never to judge my cooking we're good."
I chuckled wryly. "I assure you, I'm the last person in the world to judge anyone's cooking."
"Omg we're soulmates!" She exclaimed.
I drew in a panicked breath. "I stole a gun, Diana."
It was admirable how calm she remained. "Okay?"
"I'm in your house. With a gun, loaded and tucked behind my back. You shouldn't accept me staying here so easily."
Her stare was indecipherable. "Can you use it?"
I blinked at the unexpected response. "Um… no?"
Diana sighed rather too dramatically. "Then it's a shame. I got excited over nothing."
I was bamboozled. "Why the hell would you be excited?"
"I thought I'd finally gotten my wish." She bumped my shoulder with hers. "I've always wanted a mysterious badass with a gun for a friend."
"You're insane." I declared with incredulity.
This wasn't how it was supposed to go. She was supposed to kick me out, after freaking out first as she should. Where was the woman that had panicked when she first learned I was connected to the Cosa Nostra?
Diana chuckled and took a sip of her beer. "It's chill Cara. I grew up in a gun obsessed family so I'm unfazed. I have a gun too and I can use it. You'd be surprised by how well."
"Wait, for real?"
"Yeah." She drank her beer.
I suspected I was gawking at her. "Do you ever stop being amazing?"
"Unfortunately, no." She raised her bottle. "Cheers to us badass girls with loaded guns."
Still awestruck, I clinked hers with mine. "Cheers."
We drank in silence for a while before I spoke again. "Thank you, again."
She bumped shoulders with me again. "Stop mentioning."
I laughed but this time, it was breathy with relief.
"How do you feel about being my cocktail taster tonight?" Diana suddenly asked, getting up.
I sat up on the couch. "I'm up for anything that can get me flat out drunk."
"Be right back." She said before disappearing into her kitchen.
I drank up the last of my bottle and set it down. I stared at the city painting once more, swearing to drink until I was completely devoid of any thoughts of my stepbrother.
Drinking I'd do for tonight but for tomorrow, I should definitely find a way to get back the purse I took to the welcome party. I needed to email my professor concerning the reference she promised me. And maybe I'd block Luca's phone number too.
If I have the balls to though. I just hope that he does something annoying like spam me with calls and texts so I'd be emboldened enough to do it.
The pathetic side of me wondered if he'd even be bothered enough to do that. For all I know, he could have decided he was done with putting up an act, ready to find my replacement. It was how made men like him operated after all. This was clear from the so-called exclusive arrangement he had with me while being secretly engaged to the snarky mafia princess.
Maybe one of the girls back at Rico's would be lucky to be the new exclusive mistress.
Diana returned with a tray containing half empty bottles of vodka, bourbon and gin, a shaker, a jug of lemonade as the mixer, a bowl of ice cubes and two cocktail glasses.
"This here, baby, is the best potion for forgetting shitty exes-"
Crazy how I couldn't even call Luca that.
"-you'd be too lit to even remember him by the time you have a taste of this bad bitch." Diana finished, already pouring the vodka into the shaker.
"Great, exactly what I needed tonight." I said, quite aware that it would have to take just more than one night of Diana's wonder drink to forget Luca Salvatore.