Chapter 29: Book 2 Chapter 3
Jenna
Tommy ordered burgers and fries at the local diner. He was always trying his hardest to cheer me up. Tried to get my mind off Colton. He smiled, showing off his dimples as he sipped his Coke. I took another bite of my burger and moaned. It was so juicy, bursting with flavor. Every time I looked up at him, he was looking at me with a warm smile. It was like he was looking into my soul. I laid my burger down, taking a fry and stuffing my face.
“So, have you thought of any names yet?” He asked.
I frowned at the question, “No.”
“Shit, I’m sorry. I’m supposed to be keeping your mind off him.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m fine.”
“You can lie to Benjamin and Chloe, but I can tell when you’re lying.”
“Tommy—”
“Jenna, let’s just eat and I’ll take you back home.”
“Tommy?”
“Yes?”
“How come I’ve never seen you with another woman? I mean, are you gay? It’s okay if you are.”
“I’m not gay.”
“Then, why haven’t you had a girlfriend?”
“Because—the girl I like doesn’t even know I’m alive. She sees me as a friend. Just a stupid friend.”
“Well, she sounds like an idiot.”
“Are you finished?”
“Yes, I’m so full. I bet I gained ten pounds just eating that.”
“You look fine. You’re supposed to be eating more.”
“I’m going to get so fat.”
“Stop that.”
“Stop what?”
“Thinking so low of yourself. You’re beautiful no matter what.”
Tommy came around the table and helped me up. He was so close that I could feel his breath fanning my face. I could feel my face heating up as he reached up and brushed his finger across my bottom lip.
He whispered, “You had a little something on your face.”
Being so close to him was making me feel so hot. Maybe it was just the pregnancy hormones making me feel this way. Yeah, that had to be it.
Tommy cleared his throat and said, “Come on, let’s get you back home.”
Tommy drove me back to my house and walked me to the door. He gave me a hug and whispered, “Call me if you need anything—anything at all. I mean it, just text me and I’ll be right here.”
“I will.” I hugged him back, “Thank you for everything, Tommy. You’re going to make some woman very happy.”
Tommy stiffened and forced a smile, “I’m just next door if you need me.”
I stepped into my house and sighed. I could hear Tommy’s car pull away as I closed the door. I turned around and screamed. Benjamin and Chloe was already sitting on my couch waiting for me.
“Dammit, you scared me!”
“Was that Tommy?”
“Yeah, he took me and got me something to eat. Why?”
Benjamin shook his head, pulling out an envelope. I already knew what it was. Colton had written me another letter. “This is for you. Are you going to come with us to visit Colton next time?”
“I—I don’t know. A part of me wants to, but another part of me—”
“I get it. You need time.” Benjamin said.
“Just think about it. Benjamin, we better go before we’re late. Amber and Jeff are probably already waiting for us.”
Chloe gave me a side hug and Benjamin gave me a sad smile. They stepped out the front door, leaving me alone. It was just me and Colton’s letter. I trembled as I opened the envelope and unfolded the letter.
Dear Jenna,
Benjamin and Chloe came to see me today. You weren’t there. I wanted to see your beautiful face, baby. I hoped and prayed you would come. I miss how we used to lay under the stars and hold each other. The way your fingers traced my chest. How your breath fanned my neck as we confessed our love to each other. I know you still love me. I still love you. I’ll always love you. Till my last breath, baby. Benjamin and Chloe are getting married. My sister asked me to walk her down the aisle to give her away. She’s pregnant.
I dreamed of you last night. We laid under the stars, baring our souls. Our breaths against each other as I made sweet love to you. I told you how much love you. You told me you love me back as we got lost in the moment. How I wished I was there with you—to watch our child grow inside you. Do you miss me? Do you think of me as you rub your swollen belly? Yes, darling. They told me the news. That you’re carrying my child. All I’m asking is to give me a chance—to prove to you I can be a good man. Let me show you I can be the man you fell in love with. Benjamin and Chloe are coming again next Tuesday. It would mean so much to me if you came. I want to see your face staring back to me. I want to know you still care about me. That you still love me as much as I love you. I need you, baby. Hope to see you soon.
Love,
Colton
P.S. Please, forgive me for hurting you. Don’t give up on us.
I clenched the letter in my fist and broke down completely. Every time he writes me, he makes my heart ache a little more. I let out a choked sob as I cried for him. He knew about the baby. Benjamin and Chloe told him. I’m not upset with them, but I’m also not sure if I was ready to face the father of my child—our child.
Is there still us after everything that’s happened?
I placed my hand over my stomach and whispered, “What do I do?”
***
I stopped at the doors of the church and let out a shaky breath.
“Miss Bradley?” I heard a voice call to me.
“Are you okay, Miss Bradley?”
“No.”
“Do I need to call Tommy for you?”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come.” I turned and ran away from the church. Everything was crashing down. Every emotion. Each time I spent with the sexy bastard. All the times he held me in his arms. I ran to the edge of the church yard and sunk to my knees, “Please—God, what do I do? How do I move forward from this? Please, tell me—just give me a sign.”
I've cried.
I've kicked and screamed.
I've prayed for guidance—wanting to know what to do. The only thing I could do is rant and rave about him. How he left me behind. Lied to me. Used me. Played with my emotions.
No matter what, he was always there. Everything was a reminder of him in this town. There was only one thing I could do. I had to leave—get out of here and never look back.
I heard Tommy’s voice before I saw him.
“Don't go.” He said, reaching for my hand.
“I have to, because if I don't—I'll keep torturing myself. It's the only way I can forget the past.”
He blurted out, “Come stay at my cabin. Just, please don't leave. Don't leave me—don't leave us.”
Us?
“Why are you helping me? You should all hate me... hate me for being with him.”
“Nobody hates you. Who could ever hate an angel?”
“But, you should.”
He wrapped his arms around my neck and kissed me. Kissed me the way I used to be kissed. By the father of my child.
“We don't hate you. I don't hate you, Jenna. Stay the week at my cabin. If you still feel the same at the end of the week, I'll take you anywhere you want. Even if it's a million miles away.”
“Tommy, I’m sorry.” I pulled away, “I can’t.”
“Jenna, I’m sorry. Let me take you home.”
“No.”
“No?”
“I need to be alone right now, Tommy. Please understand—it’s too soon.”
The truth is—I was still in love with Colton.
Why the hell would Tommy kiss me when I'm pregnant with another man's child?