Chapter 187: Dare Not Love Again
Xavier jumped in fright and quickly explained, "Tristan, don't get the wrong idea... Zephyr... he's just joking!"
Harriet looked up, her eyes meeting Tristan's in mid-air.
For a moment, complex emotions surged in both their eyes.
Tristan strode over with his long legs and walked straight to Harriet's side, wrapping one arm around her slender waist.
"Zephyr, that's quite a joke you're making."
Zephyr froze, then quickly stood up and said seriously, "Tristan, I'm not joking. I'm serious."
Xavier covered his face with his hand, wearing an expression that said 'you're beyond help.'
"What?" Tristan's lips curved up, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. "Plenty of people covet my wife, but you're the first one bold enough to propose in public."
Zephyr frowned. "Tristan, you and Harriet are already divorced. She's single now, and I have every right to pursue her."
Tristan's eyes turned ice cold. The next second, he grabbed Zephyr by the front of his shirt. "Since you're not thinking straight, let me help you clear your head."
Before Zephyr could react, he was falling backward!
Right behind him was the swimming pool.
Zephyr fell into the pool.
Without another glance at him, Tristan pulled Harriet away.
Zephyr splashed around a few times, swam to the edge, and shouted anxiously, "Harriet!"
Xavier rolled his eyes. "Tristan's already being nice to you. If it were anyone else, he wouldn't have pushed you into the pool—he would've pushed you off a cliff!"
Harriet was pulled directly into the Rolls-Royce waiting outside.
After Tristan told the driver to go, he raised the partition in the back seat.
Just as Harriet was about to speak, Tristan suddenly kissed her lips.
Harriet's breath was quickly stolen by him. She tried to push him away, but he easily controlled her hands, forcing her to endure his demanding kiss.
Harriet could feel the changes in Tristan's body. In the cramped space, the temperature gradually rose, melting away the chill of the spring day.
Harriet's mind went blank.
After what felt like forever, when Harriet was almost out of breath, Tristan finally let her go.
Tristan buried his face in Harriet's neck, breathing heavily.
"Harriet." His low, hoarse voice sounded in Harriet's ear. "I didn't look for you because I was giving you time to process everything. And you went and flirted with another man?"
Harriet's breathing was slightly uneven. "What are you talking about? Who flirted with him?"
"You didn't flirt with him? Then why would he propose in public?"
Harriet was also helpless. "I've only met him once. Today was the second time. I found out that Mr. Ewan Habsburg has pancreatic cancer, and Mr. Zephyr Habsburg wanted to repay me."
"But you didn't reject him in public." Tristan accused. "If I hadn't come, would you have agreed to his proposal?"
Harriet was silent for a moment, then spoke calmly. "Tristan, actually, people won't die without love. It took me two years to understand this."
Tristan froze.
He slowly lifted his head to look at her beautiful profile. "Harriet, are you saying you won't forgive me?"
Harriet sat up straight, smoothing out her clothes that had become messy from their struggle, and spoke slowly. "I admit, when I found out why you insisted on terminating the pregnancy two years ago, it hit me really hard."
"I stayed in bed for two days before I could accept this fact."
"I learned from Mr. Jones that it wasn't that the baby couldn't be born—it would have caused too much damage to my body. So you were actually choosing me over the baby."
"Tristan, I'm grateful to you, really. I've never been that great of a person. Maybe if I had to choose back then, I would have chosen to let myself live too."
Her voice choked up. "But Tristan, it hurt too much. Our marriage really hurt me too much."
"We lost two children in a row. Maybe this is fate's arrangement. Maybe all my luck in this life was only enough to meet you, but not enough to live a peaceful and stable life with you."
"So Tristan, I don't want to keep trying. I can't forget the past, and I'm afraid I'll face the same pain again in the future."
"So let's just stop here. From now on, we won't bother each other."
Tristan listened quietly as she finished, something cracking in his eyes.
He suddenly grabbed her shoulders. "I don't agree!"
Harriet's eyes filled with tears. "People won't die without love—actually, there's a second half to that saying: some love makes life worse than death!"
When she was strapped to the operating table and forced to lose the baby, she really wished she could die and never wake up again.
As long as she didn't wake up, she wouldn't have to face that unbearable pain.
"Harriet, I had no choice." Tristan's voice was dark and hoarse. "Did you want me to watch your body get damaged? I asked Mr. Jones—if you insisted on having the baby, not only would your health deteriorate, your life would be shortened."
"You would die, maybe at 30, or maybe at 40."
"I know you could have had a child of your own, but you lost that because of me." Harriet's heart felt like it was being cut by knives. "I should spend my whole life repaying you, but Tristan, I really don't dare to love you anymore."
She was scared.
She had loved Tristan for over ten years, and the pain far outweighed the happiness.
And that pain was more than she could bear.
"Harriet, you can't do this to me..." Tristan heard his own voice.
Harriet closed her eyes, pushing down the emotions surging inside her. "Tristan, I've already made up my mind."
Harriet had the driver stop the car and got out by the roadside.
She didn't hail a cab to leave, but walked aimlessly along the street alone.
When she finally got tired, she flagged down a taxi and went back to Lakeside Gardens.
Harriet was clearly exhausted, but she tossed and turned in bed, unable to sleep.
Lying in bed, her mind filled with memories of all the moments she'd shared with Tristan over the years.
She didn't know why, but even though she'd made her decision, even though she'd said everything that needed to be said, her heart still ached.
When she came back to herself, it was already dawn.
Harriet got up and washed her face, then went to the clinic early for work.
Harriet was so busy in the morning that she didn't even have time for a sip of water. When she finally finished, Ian knocked and came in.
"Harriet, Mr. Johnson has been waiting for you for a while."
Harriet got up and went out to see Nolan sitting on the sofa in the waiting area, flipping through a medical journal.
"Mr. Johnson, you were looking for me?"
Nolan stood up with a smile. "I was passing by the clinic and wanted to ask if you have time to have lunch together."
Harriet readily agreed. "Of course. But since this is near the clinic, lunch is on me. Let's go."
Ian had things to do, so he didn't join them.
A new Mexican restaurant had opened near the clinic. Since they both could handle spicy food, they chose to eat there.
Harriet got a private room and poured tea for Nolan after ordering.
"How's Chase doing lately?"
"Pretty good. His test scores this time were great."
"I'm asking if he's happy, not how his grades are."
Nolan smiled. "No wonder Chase likes you so much. Once kids start elementary school, most people start focusing on their grades."
"Even if Chase were average, you have enough money for him to live comfortably his whole life, so as long as he's happy, that's what matters."
"Chase is in pretty good spirits, he just lacks a mother's love." Nolan looked at her. "Harriet, would you be willing to be his mother?"