Chapter 59 I Hit Bottom
By Valeria
At the meeting were Gonzalo, who occasionally came because he had significant shares in some companies, and Omar as the general director, along with some other directors, including Carlos.
Alejandro walked in with a scowl, his eyes red, and I think several people must have thought he was drunk. I knew his eyes were red because he had been crying. I don't know if he had ever cried in his life before today.
I was confused, hurt, and furious.
That's why my face wasn't any better than Alejandro's.
Gonzalo and Omar kept looking at us; I think they didn't know what had happened.
I expressed my feelings because I was already convinced I was going to quit my job, and on top of that, I had never been so upset with Emi, my great friend, who now seemed like my ex-friend.
I was distracted, like never before.
Alejandro didn't say a word throughout the meeting.
I think they asked questions that, for the first time, I couldn't answer. I didn't know what they were talking about.
My mind was racing, evaluating what to do with my life.
It seemed like everything was over.
Of all the women in the world, he slept with my cousin, the same one who had slept with my previous boyfriend.
Could it be like she said, that I'm so bad in bed that he went to look for someone else?
I saw the video. I know he didn't perform... like he did the night before and that same morning when we spent hours making love... maybe he was tired.
I know, firmly, that I have to forget him. At least, I'm going to distance myself from him.
If not, I'll end up in a mental hospital.
What I would give to be the woman of his life, his woman, his lover, his friend.
After a year of sharing so many things intimately, I believed I was his woman.
Except that at night, he would go out with his friends and lovers, and I would go home, cry in silence, and dream about him.
I gave myself to him like no one else, I was almost his wife, and I keep thinking about it... I was just his secretary... not anymore.
I gather strength from wherever I can and decide that I'm going to the United States. That's the best thing, yes, I'm going to live with my parents and my sister.
I feel tears filling my eyes, and I want to hold them back.
"Are you okay, Vale?"
Carlos asks me.
As soon as he approached, Alejandro stood up and stayed beside me.
"Yes, thanks."
They exchanged looks, and Alejandro was waiting for any word or provocation from Carlos. He had been holding a grudge for a long time.
Carlos walked away and didn't speak again.
When the meeting ended, only Ale, Omar, Gonzalo, and I remained.
I gathered the last items from the table, removed the water glasses and coffee cups, and when they left, I would tell the cleaning staff to come in.
I left the room in silence, leaving the three friends and partners alone.
I closed the door behind me.
I checked for a flight to Miami.
There was one for the next day at 9 PM.
Perfect.
In the morning, I would go to work, talk to Susana around noon, and then pick up my suitcases.
I'm not going to say goodbye to Emi.
She's so blind that she might even tell Omar where I'm going.
Tonight, I'll pack, tomorrow I'll go to work as if nothing happened, and around lunchtime, I'll hand in my resignation. I'll tell Susana, not my plans, just that I've reached my limit.
I stupidly repeat my plans.
I bought the ticket, and while doing so, tears kept falling down my face.
Watching the video of them having sex didn't help at all.
However, I'm so stupid that I tell myself he didn't kiss her like he kissed me, devouring my mouth, that he didn't caress her, exploring every inch of her body, but they still had sex.
Is it true that he calls them all by my name?
I don't understand. He had me for hours and decided to move on with his life as if what we had meant nothing. Evidently, it meant nothing to him.
I wiped my tears with a swipe and paid for the ticket with my credit card.
I can't even talk without crying, so at that moment, I didn't speak to my parents either. Later, I'll talk to my sister.
By Alejandro
I cried.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Are you drunk?"
My friends asked me when we were alone.
"Valeria was also distracted. I'm sure she doesn't know what the meeting was about."
"What happened?"
They kept asking.
"I screwed up like never before."
"What happened?"
"The slut from last night is Vale's cousin."
"What?"
"I think she sought me out on purpose. She had already slept with Valeria's ex-boyfriend until she got pregnant by the guy and had an abortion, blaming Valeria."
"You're an idiot."
"Yesterday, you wanted to marry her. Why the hell did you go out last night?"
"I wanted to think Valeria wasn't that important to me."
"Was there a big fuss this morning?"
"Worse than that, her cousin is a real bitch."
"What happened?"
I pull out Valeria's cousin's phone from my pocket.
"Make sure the video that bitch took while we were screwing gets deleted, even from the cloud."
I tell Omar, handing him the phone.
"What did she do? Damn."
Gonzalo couldn't believe it.
"I didn't expect Vale to come to my apartment this morning. I don't know if she recorded everything to send it to her, to the press, or to blackmail me."
"How is Valeria?"
"She's not good. That girl told her she must be terrible in bed because after being with her, both her ex and I went looking for her cousin."
"And what did Vale say to that?"
"She called her a bitch. On top of that... I also called the girl Vale while I was screwing her."
"Again?"
"Yeah, with Daniela and a few others..."
I confess, feeling a bit ashamed.
"Brother, you're more in love than you want to admit."
"I know, I love her, I realize that now. I'm scared. Valeria didn't cry or barely did a while ago in my office. She took it all without tears or screams, just went on with her usual routine."
"What did you take? Your eyes are red."
I lower my head, feeling embarrassed.
"I cried."
"You're an idiot, you brought this on yourself."
"I know, I even told her I loved her, repeated it a thousand times, and she doesn't believe me. She thinks she's just a whim for me, and I can barely breathe when she's not next to me."
"Finally, you admit it! You offered her a million dollars, and I can't even imagine how many other things you offered her that you haven't mentioned."
I stay silent, acknowledging he's right. They say silence gives consent.
"The thing is, I don't think this is over for Valeria, and I don't know what will happen to us. I didn't want to offer marriage today because she wouldn't believe I meant it before all this happened. I don't just want to marry her because my dad wants it; I can't bear to be without her."
"Wasn't it your dad who demanded you marry her?"
"I... steered the conversation so he would demand it."
"I still don't understand what the hell you were thinking last night. Even if it hadn't been her cousin, you dug your own grave."
"I'm an idiot."
"Luckily, I didn't go with you guys last night. I'm going to play it safe for now. I don't want complications with Emi."
"You're another one who doesn't want to admit you're in love."
"I'm not in love, but I'm aware that I like Emi more than any other woman in my life, and in bed... I'd spend my whole life with her."
"Just like I said before, another one who doesn't want to admit it."
"You talk about love and have no idea what it is. You've never had someone who takes your breath away."
"That's true, but if it happened, I'd admit it right away."
"It's not easy to admit you depend on someone else."
I say confidently.
"Alejandro, you're a hypocrite. Valeria even answers for you in a bunch of meetings. At home, you depend on her for everything, even going to the bathroom..."
"Because she's my secretary."
"From the beginning, you gave her a place in your life as if she were your wife, except you had other women in your bed."
Gonzalo says.
"Dude, you faced an armed man for her. If she can't handle the cousin thing, remind her of that."
Talking with my friends helped.
Even though I wanted to go to my office to see Valeria.
Yes, even if I don't admit it to my friends, I depend on her and I'm desperate to see her.
I definitely acted like shit when I went looking for something else outside, knowing no one could compare to her and knowing she would feel terrible seeing another woman in the bed we shared hours before.
Only now do I realize that's self-sabotage.
Why didn't I try to win her over, pamper her?
What I did was take away her smile and fill her with tears.
I got the feeling it didn't even hurt her anymore, that indifference, that cold look, which hurt me when she should have been the one feeling hurt.
All because of my ego.
Because I always did what I wanted, and now I'm terrified of losing her. I don't know why, but I have a feeling similar to when Valeria's cousin entered my apartment.
I'm scared.
I was wrong, I admit it. After the night we spent together, I had no reason to go out.
I wish I could repeat that night for the rest of my life.
At the office, Vale was organizing some files on her computer.
It seemed like she didn't want to think about anything because she worked without looking up.
When I walked past her, she completely ignored me, as if I didn't exist.
Around 7 PM, without saying goodbye, she headed to the elevator, leaving me with the feeling of being alone in the world.