Chapter 16

Nicol

Fuck did I really just slipped up telling him I knew where he stayed. Except of answering him I walked back into Nikki’s room. He can make with that information what he wanted. I had more important things to worry about right now. Dr Manno was standing next to Nikki making her laugh and telling her they are going to start with the test. Nikki was so excited that we will start with the test and we can finally find out what’s wrong with her. Most days where good but she got days where she just didn’t feel well and then there was other times like now when we end up in the hospital. Yes, I could have gone to Nicolas and asked him to help me but then I had to tell him everything and I wasn’t ready for it but now it seems I need to be ready because clearly his not going to leave this or us alone. He said he wanted to be part of Nikki’s life; I really hope he means it because she would really love to have a dad. Would I want him in our lives definitely not it hurts every time I look at him so I really don’t want him near us but I’ll do anything for Nikki. Nicolas came walking into the room, Nikki’s face immediately lights up. “Nicolas did you tell the doctor to do the test?” “Yes, Nikki I did.” “Can you come here please?” She asked him so nicely. He walked over to her, not sure what to expect to be honest I didn’t know what to expect either. When he stood next to the bed she said “Closer” When he got to her level, she threw her arms around him and gave him a Nikki hug. That was what I called it; she gave the best hugs there is. When he pulled away, I saw him wiping a tear from his cheek. “Thank you, Nicolas, I’ll wash your car to pay you back.” Nicolas just smiled at her. “That’s not necessarily sweet pea.” Oh my God, he just gave her a nick name, my heart was going to explode. The porter from the x-trays came into the room “Nikki Green?” He asked “It’s me” she told him. “I’m here to take you for x-trays.” “Can my mom and Nicolas come with?” “Off course.” the porter said. Nicolas just looked at me but didn’t say a word. I was sure he had some questions but we are in the hospital.

We walked behind Nikki’s bed as the porter took her for x-trays, she was getting x-trays of her lungs and a CT scan. Luckily it wasn’t an MRI or else we would have had problems she didn’t like closed spaces; the CT scan was at least open. Hopefully she won’t’ have a problem with that. When they took Nikki in for the X-trays they asked me and Nicolas to stand outside and wait for her. I wasn’t scared I knew it wasn’t going to be scary or anything for Nikki. When they closed the door Nicolas asked “You couldn’t even have put me on her birth certificate and gave her my surname?” “I wanted to get away from you Nicolas I wanted to spare you.” Then I cut myself of “Spare me from what?” But I didn’t answer his question as the porter came out with Nikki. “You okay sweet pea?” Nicolas asked her changing his facial expression immediately. “Yes, that was nothing.” “That’s good to hear.” The porter was pushing her to the CT scan section. “Now you need to get of the bed angel.” Nicolas insisted on helping her of the bed he picked her up but he kept her in his arms. “She can walk.” “I’ll carry her.” Nikki didn’t complain I’m sure she was enjoying the manly attention she was getting or she was just very tired.

“Can you bring her in please.” The radiologist asked. When Nikki saw the CT scan, she looked at me with fear in her eyes. “Mom no I’m not going in there.” “Angel calm down. Look it’s open at the back it’s just a part of your body that’s in that tunnel.” “No No I can’t” “Nikki you have to.” “I don’t have to we can wait with this test.” She pushed her head into Nicolas’s shoulder and I was sure she was crying. Nicolas moved his lips asking me “What’s going on?” “Scared of closed spaces.” “Give me a minute.” I just nodded at him. He walked out with her the radiologist was getting a bit frustrated. “She’s scared she’ll be okay then we can go on.” The radiologist went to her office and told the assistant to call her when we were ready. I stood at the door listening to Nicolas talking to Nikki.

“Sweet pea what’s wrong?” He was sitting now with her on his lap. “Why are you calling me sweet pea?” Typical Nikki trying to change the subject something she learned from me and something Nicolas was very trained in. “I’ll answer you if you answer me.” She looked at him very skeptically. “Pinky promise” He gave her his pinky and they pinky swear then he said “You know that is the most sacred thing to do right so you have to answer me.” “Okay I’m scared.” “Why it’s just a thing that stands there you won’t even feel anything.” “But what happens if that thing collapses then I’m in there.” “What about your mother and I will stand at the other opening and if it looks like anything can happen, I will pull you out myself.” “You would really do that?” “I would do anything for you sweet pea.” “There you said it again.” “Okay fair you answered me I’ll answer you.” I was holding my breath wondering it he is going to tell her his her dad. “From the first time I saw you that name just popped into my head and now I can’t get it out of my head, so I decided to call you that. Is it okay?” She looked into the distance like she was deep in thought and then said “Okay you can do that, I don’t mind.” “Well thank you very much sweet pea. Now are you ready to go for that CT scan?” “Let’s go do it.”