Chapter 71: Matt

As I stepped into the fire station, the familiar scent of polished metal and worn leather hit me. My heart raced, not just from the anticipation of another day on the job, but also from the weight of a secret I carried. I had betrayed the trust of the woman I loved, and now I had to face the consequences.

I made my way down the narrow hallway towards my office, trying to gather my thoughts and prepare myself for whatever lay ahead. But as I turned the corner, I froze in my tracks. Tameka was there, waiting for me, leaning casually against my desk as if she owned the place. Her gaze locked onto mine, and I could see a mix of determination and longing in her eyes. Apprehension zipped through my body, and I held my breath, expecting the worst.

"Matt," she said, her voice carrying a hint of both anger and vulnerability. "We need to talk."

I felt a lump form in my throat, but I couldn't find the words to respond. I had known this moment would come, but that didn't make it any easier to face. Tameka had taken advantage of me in a moment of weakness, and I had let her. Now, I had to confront the consequences head-on.

"Tameka," I said, clearing my throat. She pushed herself off the desk and took a step closer to me. Her presence was overwhelming, her energy filling the room and suffocating me.

"You can't deny what happened between us, Captain," she said, her voice shaking with emotion. "We both felt something. Something real."

Anger flared within me, fueled by my own frustration and guilt. "Real?" I snapped. "It was a mistake, Tameka. A moment of weakness that should have never happened. You know it and I know it. I'm with Renee. I love Renee."

Her eyes narrowed, and her voice turned sharper. "Don't pretend like you didn't want it, Matt. I saw the way you looked at me. The way you kissed me back."

My hands clenched into fists at my sides as I fought to control my rising temper. "That doesn't change anything," I said through gritted teeth. "I love my girlfriend, and I will not let anything come between us."

Tameka's gaze softened, and she took a tentative step toward me. "You think you love her," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "But you don't. You need someone who understands you, who can be there for you in ways she never can. I know your dynamic, Matt. I know you have to share her with Jake and Aaron. But how? How do you do that without resenting them? Resenting her?"

Her words struck a chord within me, but I refused to let them sway me. Renee was my rock, my anchor in this unpredictable world. I couldn't imagine my life without her or the boys. They were my everything, and I couldn't risk losing them.

"I can't deny that once upon a time I might have flirted with you, or at least allowed you to do the same," I admitted, my voice filled with regret. "But it doesn't change the fact that I'm committed to Renee. I can't just throw away everything we've built together. I won't."

Tameka's eyes welled up with tears, and I could see the pain etched on her face. "You're making a mistake, Matt. You're choosing comfort over passion, and you'll regret it."

A mix of anger and sadness coursed through me as I realized the truth in her words. I had betrayed Renee, even if it had been a moment of weakness. The guilt was suffocating, threatening to consume me.

"I never meant for this to happen," I whispered, my voice hoarse with despair. "I love Renee, and I hate myself for what I've done. I need to fix this, somehow."

Tameka's sharp gaze relented, and she took a step back, giving me some space. "You have to tell her, Matt," she said, her voice gentle. "She deserves to know the truth, no matter the consequences. And you have to be prepared for whatever happens next."

Her words hung heavy in the air, and I knew she was right. I had to face the consequences of my actions and take responsibility for the damage I had caused. It wouldn't be easy, and the road ahead would be filled with pain and uncertainty. But I couldn't let fear dictate my choices. I had to confront the truth, no matter how devastating it might be.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," I said, and Tameka scoffed. She was angry again, and she wasn't going to resist letting me know it.

"You're only hurting yourself," she said, folding her arms protectively over her chest. "Now you need to tell Renee what happened between us."

"Tameka—"

"Or I will."

As Tameka turned and walked away, leaving me alone in my office, I took a deep breath. The weight of guilt still pressed against my chest, but beneath it, a flicker of hope burned. I would do whatever it took to make things right, to salvage what was left of my relationship with Renee. And maybe, just maybe, we could rebuild the trust we might lose. But Tameka was right; it had to be sooner rather than later. The longer I kept this hidden from Renee, the harder it would be for us to move on.

If she'd even want to move on from it, anyway.

With a sigh, I took a seat in my chair, resting my head in my hands for a moment of reprieve. I didn't have much time to gather my bearings before there was a knock on my door, and Vickie poked her head in, hands on her hips as she glared at me.

"Good morning to you, too," I said. "What's with the scowl?"

"What was Tameka doing waiting in your office, Cap?" Vickie demanded, stepping into the room and shutting the door loudly behind her. "She looked pissed just now."

"It's nothing," I lied. "Work-related crap. You know how it is."

Vickie continued to glare at me. She wasn't convinced, I could tell, and I had to be careful what to say next because Vickie and Renee were friends. If Tameka didn't tell Renee about our issue first, then Vickie certainly would, and I couldn't have that.

"Don't bullshit me," Vickie said, glancing over her shoulder at the closed door. She sighed before coming forward, leaning down to rest her palms on the other side of my desk as her eyes narrowed at me. "I know something is going on between the two of you. Now what is it?"

I sighed. I couldn't lie to her, now now. "Tameka kissed me," I said. "When we were at Aaron's art galley, she kissed me."

Vickie's eyebrows shot up, her lips pursing as she frowned at me. "Did you kiss her back?"

"Not really, no." This time, I was being honest. "But it doesn't really matter, does it? It still happened."

"Does Renee know?"

I blew a breath of air between my teeth and swallowed. "No, not yet. I haven't told her. Jake saw it happen though."

Disappointment fluttered across Vickie's face, and I had to look away to keep my composure.

"Why doesn't Renee know?" she demanded. "You can't hide this from her, Matt."

"I know I can't. I just…" I trailed off, groping for the words I didn't know how to say. "Things are going really great between the four of us, Vick, and I'm terrified that telling her is going to mess everything up. Not just for me and her, but for all of us. Jake and Aaron too."

Vickie shook her head. "It doesn't matter, Matt. If you don't tell her sooner rather than later, you could lose her forever, You could lose all of them forever. Is that what you want?"

"Of course not."

"Then tell her."

"I will."

"Good." She straightened up, forcing a smile that I could tell wasn't genuine. "Let's get to work, Cap. You've got a team to lead."