Chapter 306

Walking off to the side of the stage, Sam gives me a slight smirk as I take a sip of my bottled water. I’d just finished a set of songs. I love working at The Lounge. It’s so much more relaxed and has a more comfortable atmosphere. The people in the audience are there to listen to me sing, not take my clothes off. I may not get as many tips, but it’s still a fun time. Sam watches my tip jar and writes down any requests given. When I first started singing here, I just sang the songs I wanted to, then Elena asked me to make a list of the songs I knew so customers could request them.

The Lounge also lets me wear different outfits; tonight, I’m wearing Courtney’s prom dress. It’s sexy as hell and perfect for my nights here. It’s strapless, sheer, and the only thing covering me is a nude bodice; gems and sequins are embroidered all over it. I had to get it altered in the bust area to make it fit, and I got the skirt removable. Since having Ella, my bust is a lot bigger, which is surprising. It might be because I started eating more, I’m not sure. Depending on the crowd, my outfits can be a different style. Tonight, like most Fridays, it’s primarily couples or women out on a girls' night after work.

“I wasn’t supposed to tell you, but your ex is in the crowd,” Sam tells me.

“What?” I ask, shocked and peek my head out to the stage to look. I can’t usually see the crowd until I come off stage because of the bright spotlight.

“He’s at the bar watching,” he tells me.

“Why weren’t you supposed to tell me?” I ask.

“He told the barman not to tell you, and well, I can't keep a secret from you,” he says with a grin. I smile and reapply my red lipstick.

“I probably shouldn’t have told him I’m working tonight,” I state. This is the third time Logan has turned up (that I know of) when I’m working. “What’s the next song?”

“Someone Else by Miley Cyrus,”

“Perfect, what’s the next one?” I say and touch my mask, making sure it’s in place. I’d gone with a traditional black lace mask today and my black wig from earlier.

“Hit me like a man,” he says.

“Fun,” I say and turn back to the stage.

The music starts to play as I walk back onto the stage. I glance at Logan, and I wish I hadn’t. How can he always look so good? I’m either very sexually frustrated, or the thirst for him is real.

“I have another requested song for you all. I like this one a lot. It’s always nice when I can relate to a song, the one after is much more fun, though,” I say and look at the live band.

If you're looking for love,

know that love don't live here anymore,

he left with my heart,

they both walked through that door, without me…

The song ends and moves straight into the heavy drumming and guitar of the next one. Unlike the last one, I like to move more with this one. I tend to also get a few more tips with it, mainly because it’s referencing sex. I even move into the audience with this one.

‘I am strong, love is evil,

It's a version of perversion that is only for the lucky people

Take your time and do with me what you will, I don't mind

You know I'm ill, you know I'm ill.’

I finish the first chorus and move down to the audience, the bass’s strumming leading me on with the drums and giving me the confidence to sing around the audience.

Logan watches, and I feel his eyes on me the whole time. I can’t help but glance up at him now and then to see his reaction. Nothing changes. He just stands there with his back to the bar, watching. If it was only us in this room right now, I know for a fact I wouldn’t finish this song.

I sing another few songs that are more ballad types. It’s obvious there are many women in tonight, the ones that requested the songs have been singing along, making me smile a little. It’s cute as hell but also gives me this little flutter in my heart when I see them sing with their partners. The love they have for each other is evident. It makes me wish I could have that again, but I know I can’t. Logan ruined any chance of me allowing myself to love like that again. I have to depend on myself and my daughter.

Wiping my eyes with a cotton pad and some makeup remover, I notice Logan walk into the dressing room. He leans against the wall, his designer suit jacket tightening as he folds his arms and watches me.

“Usually, when fans come backstage, they have flowers,” I tease. He smirks and moves closer to me.

“I think I’m more than a fan,” he says.

“Doesn’t mean you don’t bring flowers,” I say with a small smile. He trails his fingers down my back making me shiver a little.

“I’ll remember for next time,” he says and leans against the dresser I’m standing at. “What are you doing after here?”

“Home,” I tell him.

“Can I take you for a drink?” he asks. I take my wig off and then let my hair out of the wig cap, letting it fall down my back in curls.

“I don’t think that is a good idea,” I state.

“Why not? It’s only a drink,” he says innocently, knowing full well what I mean. We nearly kissed earlier, and the way he’s looked at me all night makes me think dirty thoughts.

“Because I don’t think it will end there,” I say and look at him. Thanks to the heels, I’m eye level with him.

“Well, I’m hoping it will end with me dropping you home and seeing you Sunday afternoon,” he says, “unless you have other ideas.” he tilts his head at that statement. I don’t miss the playful smirk on his lip.

“I’m not dressed for drinks,” I’m making any excuse now.

“I’m sure you have other dresses in there. What did you wear to come to work?” I smile a little as he knows what I came to work in. It was the skinny jeans and top I wore earlier.

“Ok, let me get changed, and I’ll meet you at the bar,” I say as I continue removing the heavy eye makeup.

“Although you look very, very good in this dress,” he says as his eyes give me an appreciative look over. He moves to run his fingers up the slit of my dress, making my skin tingle. I look at him and see the desire and heat in his eyes. His fingers reach the nude bodice I’m wearing underneath and trail along the sensitive skin. “Makes me wonder just how much you will let me do,” he says as he leans closer to me, referencing the song I’d sung earlier. I gulp and feel my mouth become suddenly dry.

“What do you want to do?” I ask. Jesus, what is wrong with my brain? I think it’s disconnected from my mouth.

“What I want to do will definitely give you pleasure and pain,” he says.

Maybe we shouldn’t go for drinks. We should end the night here. I’ll go home, maybe pull out my battery-operated boyfriend and see him on Sunday. His lips skim mine, and I want nothing more than to pull him closer and stop this torturous teasing. I’m that caught in his spell I don’t realise I’m already touching him. My hands are on his muscular chest as his other hand is on my butt. I lick my lips in anticipation. I know what his mouth can do, and I’ve never wanted something so much in such a long time.

Someone clears their throat. I look and see Elena and Sam, both standing at the door of the dressing room. From the smirk on Sam’s face, I’ve gone bright red. Logan pulls away from me but doesn’t take his hands from me straight away. He lets his touch linger as he moves away from me.

“I’ll meet you at the bar,” he says to me and walks out. I turn quickly and go back to remove the rest of my makeup, leaving only the bright red lipstick.

“That was intense,” Elena says. I look at her in the mirror and then look away. “I came to tell you how good you were tonight.”

“Thanks,” I murmur. She stands where Logan was standing, only not as close. “Don’t say it; I know what you’re going to say,”

“I wasn’t going to say anything, just be careful,”

“I know, I’m trying,”

“Try harder,” Sam states. I frown at him, “Courtney doesn’t sing his praises.”

“He’s not a bad guy. He’s just not good for me,” I say and look down. “Courtney has a bad view of him because of how he left things with me.”

“You still have feelings for him. Exes are exes for a reason,” Sam states.

“I know. We’re not getting back together,” I sternly clarify. More to convince me than them. I know they’re trying to look out for me just like Courtney, but I know all of this.

“He’s just meeting you after work for what?” he asks.

“Sam, leave it,” Elena says and then looks at me. “Sometimes the heart overrides the brain,” she says to him, but is looking at me.

“We’re only going for drinks,” I say to them both. “Then he’s dropping me home, he’s not coming in, and then I’ll see him on Sunday. Nothing is going to happen,” I state to them and tell myself.

“Sure,” Sam says and places my tips jar on the dressing table.

“Did you give the band some?” I ask. He nods, “What about you?” I ask

“Stop giving your tips away. Sam gets paid enough,” Elena states, and I smile. “He gets more than you an hour,” she says and moves my tip jar towards me.

I unclip the dress’s skirt and decide to put my light blue skinny jeans on and wear them with the glitter heels I’m wearing now. That way, I’m not underdressed or overdressed. There aren’t many bars open at this time.

“So is this a date? Sam asks.

“No,” I say with a sigh as I pull my jeans on. “It’s drinks. I’m allowed to have drinks with my daughter’s dad, right?” I ask. They both tilt their heads a little as if they’re unsure.

“From what we’ve just seen, it’s not just drinks,” Sam says.

“It is, and if it’s not, then that means I’m getting laid, so it’s a win-win either way,” I state, and I can see the worry on their face. “It’s fine,”

“He’s engaged,” Elena tells me.

“I know,”

“Don’t set yourself up for heartbreak,” she tells me.

“I’m not,” I say as I put a light layer of foundation on. I notice Sam and Elena exchange a worried glance.

After about ten minutes, I’m ready. I combed through my hair to make it a little tidier after having it squashed under a wig for the past couple of hours. I’d gone with a more natural makeup look, just a few coats of mascara and a bit of bronzer and blush to make me look a little more awake. Today has been a busy day. After the school meeting, I managed to nap for an hour for work, but that was about it. Luckily tomorrow I’ll get to sleep in.