Chapter 3: CHAPTER THREE

“Hi baby. You having fun with Aunt Kim?” Savannah said to her oldest son, Jake. She had just finished her training session and sat panting on a bench in the locker room. She tried to make Sundays her gym days since Kenneth and Kim were home and didn’t seem to mind keeping them. At that moment, the gym was quiet, only one other person in the shower.

“We’re watching the Lion King.” Jake replied. “Nick is still sleep.”

“Did you have fun with your Dad?” Savannah asked, plucking lint from her gym shorts.

“Yeah. We went to the playground and then we went to get something to eat.”

“That sounds nice.” Savannah was curious about how much time they spent with Angie, but she was careful not to use her children as spies. They were just kids. She wasn’t even hurting like she was when Thomas first started cheating on her. Back then, she was suffering from all sorts of issues. She would follow Thomas to see where he was going. She stopped sleeping and she stopped eating. She was able to manage taking care of the children but around that time, she noticed that something in her had changed. She had stopped caring about herself.

“Mommy!” She heard Jake yell. “I said I love you and I’ll call you back.”

“Okay. I’ll see you later.”

She tucked her phone into the pocket of her gym bag and looked down at the pamphlet in her hand. For a few months, she had been collecting any information she could find. Any information to explain away what was going on with her body. For weeks, she had been feeling a little off. Her body just did not feel like its usual self and so she researched the symptoms. Intense Cramps. Fatigue. Nausea. Chest pains. If there was a man around, she would have believed that she was pregnant.

Her head was full of acronyms that represented different illnesses. Even with knowledge at her fingertips, she could not figure out which one applied to her. She could just as easily visit a doctor and get a diagnosis. But that would make it real. That would mean that it was no longer a what-if issue. She was not yet ready to deal with whatever it was. The sweat at her brow betrayed the fact that her subconscious has already silently resigned itself to the worst.

Savannah walked over to her locker and tucked the pamphlet into her backpack.

She smiled thinking about Dwight. Usually, she cautioned herself against indulging in silly fantasies about men, but it had been so long since she’d had a man worth the fantasy. She imagined waking up in his arms. His light snoring in her ear. She hoped it was light snoring. She imagined chasing after all the kids, maybe a dog or two. She hoped the kids would get along. The more she thought about him, the more she realized she wanted to see him. See his handsome face. His beautiful teeth. His strong shoulders. Her phone vibrated against her leg.

“Everything ready for tomorrow, Kendra?” Kendra liked to call on the weekends to prepare Savannah for the load on Monday. Savannah thought it was a bad idea seeing as though she spent Saturdays doing whatever and Sundays relaxing. However, she soon realized the benefits that it afforded her. She was able to get ahead of things before the Monday workday began. She could prepare the materials she needed and put them in her briefcase. It had been a good idea after all.

“Mr. Clarke sent an email wanting to confirm the meeting Tuesday. And you have some samples being sent out to you in the morning.” Her assistant said.

“Thank you. I’ll give him a call on Monday.”

Savannah took a long sip of water, wiped the sweat from her face and headed towards the treadmill. When her legs were tight and felt like rubber an hour later, she rested her body against the front frame of the equipment, her body drenched with sweat as she panted heavily. The five-minute walk around the short, indoor track calmed her breathing and cooled her body down.

Savannah dropped herself down onto the benches. Her phone jumped. She couldn’t remember a Sunday when her phone was as active as it was then. “Yes?”

“I was wondering what you were doing for taxes this year?”

“Thomas? What do you mean what am I doing?”

“I think that since I pay my child support on time that I should at least get to claim them, or that you should give me some part of the refund.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No. I’m actually very serious.”

Savannah stifled a laugh. “You think you should get paid to take care of your children?”

He sucked his teeth. ’I think I should get something. I mean, look at all these fathers out here who won’t do anything for their kids. I pay every month and on time. That should count for something.”

“I have to admit that you are a good father. But, if we go by your reasoning, who is going to pay me for being a full-time mother and taking care of my children?”

“That’s not what I meant Savannah. All I’m saying is that I struggle to make sure Jake and Nicholas get their money on time and you get all the financial benefits. I need some things too.”

“Thomas, I use that money to continue to take care of our kids. Make sure they eat; they have clothes and medicine. Beds to sleep in. Let’s not forget that being a provider is not just about money. Who is here when they both have fevers? When they are throwing tantrums? Who stays up late at night with them when they can’t sleep? Who is with Nicholas when he is in the ER because he had an attack?”

“Stop being dramatic.” He replied. “I went to the hospital with you when he had an attack.”

“Yea. But do you remember leaving a little while after you got there?” Savannah sighed. “Look, I don’t want to get into a debate about who is the better parent. You’re a good dad. But if you are asking me to pay you back the money you give to your kids, I’m gonna have to say no.”

She heard his mumble into the phone and cuss under his breath. “Fine. See how I start acting.” He hung up the phone.

“Whatever.” She mumbled to herself. She gathered her things and made her way to get her kids.