Chapter 178
Nick's POV
"Did you love her?" I freeze at that question. Lena is watching me, and I know my next answer will hurt her.
"We were together for three years, Lena," I began, and I watched her shrink in her seat. "Yes, I loved her, but that stopped when
I laid eyes on you." I could feel and see the doubt in her eyes. She didn't believe me.
"Would you still be with her if I didn't show up?" I know this will hurt, but I'm going to be honest with her. She is asking questions and needs honest answers.
"Yes," I watch the light die in her eyes, and it kills me. She nods more for herself, and I watch her deflate.
"Thanks for being honest, Nick; she is withdrawing. I feel it in our bond; I'm going to head back to bed. I'm still tired." I watch her walk away, and I feel like total shit. I sit with my head in my hands, and I know our mate relationship is in trouble. Valerie just had to ruin everything.
Lena's POV
I make it to the guest room and collapse on the bed in tears. He loved her and would still be with her if I didn't come in and ruin it. I'm a whore always was and always will be. I sob for hours, it seems, till I hear him walk in, and I fake being asleep. "Little one," he says, approaching the bed, and I fake sleeping and waking up, hoping he doesn't see the puffy redness that exists on my face. I know my eyes are swollen. I don't feel any better as he stares at me, his eyes full of concern.
"Yes," I yawn, rubbing my eyes and sitting up.
"Do you need pain pills? Do you think you could eat?" He asks softly.
"Yes to the pain pills, and I'm not that hungry yet." I'm trying to be strong, but I feel like sobbing. This hurts.
"You need to eat, little one," he murmurs, and I sigh.
"I'd rather sleep," I say, not looking up at him. I keep hearing over and over that he loved her and that he'd still be with her if I didn't show up and ruin it. I know he didn't say I'd ruin it, but I feel I did. He loved her. Three years is a committed relationship, and that killed me. I went through hell for years while he fucked her and was happy.
Would I ever be happy? Was it worth it to stick around?
I wonder if I should take my chances and run. I need to get away from him and all of this. I still don't fully trust Savage or anybody here.
"Lena, I don't hear him till he touches me. Little one, focus on me," he says, and I snap to here and now.
"I'm here," I say, feeling off. I'm beyond hurt and feel unwanted; I'm just really tired", he strokes my cheeks, and I just sit there instead of withdrawing from his touch. I love the tingles, but even that doesn't help me.
My feelings are destroyed. My emotional state is messing with me, and I hate it.
"I got a doc coming with meds," I nod.
"Thank you," I say as he stares at me.
"Baby, I swear I'm not in love with her. Please believe me, Lena, I really do want you." I nod, but I don't believe anything out of his mouth. He loves her, or he did. I can't compete with this. I only know abuse and forced sex.
"I believe you." my voice sounds foreign, and I move from his touch to lie down. I yawn again. I feel my wolf whimper as I cover up. I may need to run away because I don't feel wanted anymore. I don't feel sad here, and I don't want the pain that comes with figuring it all out. Megan is also here, and I can't keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I know damn well she will come after me, and no amount of retraining will stop it.