Chapter 26: Chapter Twenty-Six: Wide Awake

Helaine

When my eyes fluttered open, I found my face buried in Evan’s chest. We were locked together in a tangle of limbs in the too-small sleeping space. Most coffins weren’t built for two, and his was no exception.

But then, coffins weren’t built with the comfort of the living in mind.

He carried me here last night after we got out of the bath. He said I could sleep on the couch if I’d be more comfortable, but I wanted to stay with him, so any aches I might’ve felt today on account of the cramped sleeping arrangements were my own fault.

But it was worth it to fall asleep in his arms without having to question the way he felt about me.

Carefully, I untangled myself from Evan’s embrace, climbing out of his coffin carefully so as not to wake him. I wasn’t sure if I even could wake him, considering I had no idea what time it was.

Were vampires compelled to sleep through the day, or was it just about avoiding sunlight? There was so much I didn’t know. So much I would need to know if I wanted to make this work.

And I did, very badly.

But looking down at him now, there was no questioning what he was. Evan didn’t need to breathe, and while he often did it for show when he was awake, he most definitely wasn’t breathing now.

If he hadn’t shown me how very alive he was last night, I’d believe he was dead. But . . . he was, wasn’t he? Living dead, Nosferatu.

The body had the appearance of life, but the soul was . . . well, his soul wasn’t really dead anymore if we could believe Lilith. I wasn’t sure what that meant for him.

Pushing a stray lock of hair out of his face, I leaned down to press a kiss to the cool skin of his forehead.

It didn’t matter what he was. The only thing that mattered was that he was mine.

With a soft smile on my face, I padded quietly over to where my jeans had been left unceremoniously on the floor to pick my phone out of the pocket.

The harsh light of the screen’s glow in Evan’s dark apartment made me squint my eyes, but when I saw that it was half past five in the evening my jaw dropped.

I had never been one to sleep in so late, but then . . . I supposed I had no idea what time it was when we finally crawled into bed. It was already late by the time we got to Evan’s apartment, and between Aurelia and Lilith’s “visit”, our session on the coffin, and the bath . . . 

Maybe I shouldn’t have been surprised by the hour.

My eyes landed on Evan again, still sleeping soundly in his coffin. If we were going to make this work in the long term, I’d need to get used to late nights and no mornings to speak of. Knowing Evan, he’d meet me half way if he could, but this wasn’t the sort of thing a vampire could compromise on.

At least the art association we were a part of usually hosted functions after dark anyway, and the galleries that hosted my paintings were typically evening affairs.

As for my mural painting gig, I was sure he’d understand if every once in a while I needed to wake up early. I was even more sure that he’d have no shortage of ways to make sure I was good and exhausted so I could fall asleep at a reasonable time.

That’s when I froze, dropping down onto the plush couch with a thousand yard stare on my face.

I was kidding myself.

I could sit here and plan out how to make my and Evan’s relationship fit into my normal life all I wanted, but the truth was that my normal life was over.

How was I ever supposed to go back to my simple human life with my simple human friends when I knew that deep inside of me, I was born to bring about the end of days?

How was I supposed to watch movies with Del and Roman as though I didn’t know that the apocalypse was coming, and I was destined to be the one at the helm of it all? I still didn’t understand any of it, but I couldn’t put them in danger if something evil was coming for me.

No. The best thing I could do for them would be to cut them off.

I should resign from the art association, and I should ask Evan to help me pack up and move somewhere far away from civilization, where I wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone.

My hands trembled as I held my phone, trying to think of what the hell I could possibly tell them to make them understand why I couldn’t be around them anymore, but a missed call notification turned my blood to ice in my veins.

Dad.

Suddenly, my phone may as well have been fire in my hand, but I couldn’t let go. My phone should’ve shattered from how tightly I was squeezing it.

My whole childhood, that man beat me down and criticized everything I ever did. As far as he was concerned, every tiny little spark of joy I ever felt was a sin. He treated me like he hated me, right up until I had had enough, and I was finally old enough to make the choice to leave his house for good.

I was still so young back then, and like a switch had been flipped, he begged me not to go. He followed me out of the house, swearing up and down that I didn’t know what I was doing, and that the world wouldn’t be kind to me.

He ended up being right about that, but he hadn’t been kind to me either. No matter how much I suffered going out on my own, I’d go through it all over again rather than live under that man’s roof.

The feeling had only gotten worse since Lilith’s revelation.

The devil you knew wasn’t always better than a devil you didn’t, and even though life was hard for me after I started a new life outside of his house, at least I was free.

Now, I didn’t feel free at all, and his crusade against sin and desperation to keep me in that house made all the sense in the world.

“Helaine?” Evan called, his groggy waking voice turning my attention away from my dad’s notification on my phone. “What time is it?”

“It’s almost six.” My voice sounded too calm for the way I felt right now in a way that was almost eerie.

I barely recognized it as my own.

“Have you been awake long?” He climbed out of the coffin, and the lazy way he rubbed his eyes and stretched was enough to make the corner of my lips tug into a small smile in spite of the panic seated firmly in my chest.

“No, I just got up a few minutes ago.”

He stepped behind me, resting his hands on my hips and kissing the back of my neck. “I’ll have to buy a bed so you have somewhere to sleep when you stay over.”

I leaned into him, savoring his touch. But I still couldn’t bring myself to calm down, my mind was entirely fixated on the phone and just what it was my father had to say to me now.

Did he find out about us summoning Lilith somehow? Did that strange woman from yesterday contact him?

There was so much on my mind . . . 

“You’re tense,” Evan whispered against the shell of my ear, pressing a kiss to the sensitive skin just behind it. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“It’s . . . my dad,” I sighed, holding up my phone for him to see the new voicemail notification. “He tried to called me this morning.”

He squeezed my shoulders reassuringly. “What did he want?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t listened to it yet.”

“Do you want some privacy?” He asked, stepping back around me to look into my eyes reassuringly. “I can go into the bathroom if you want.”

“No, you can stay.” My lips pressed together into a thin line and I took his hand in mine, trying to anchor myself to something that felt stable. “Please stay, actually.”

It was good of him to offer, but I . . . I’d prefer that he hear it. If it was going to have anything to do with this whole damn anti-christ situation, I didn’t want to have to force myself to repeat it to keep him in the loop.

He only nodded, standing close to me for support.

With a deep breath, I hit the button, squeezing my eyes shut like I was expecting a slap.

“Hello Helaine, it’s your dad.” Frank Fairgrieve took a deep breath on the other end of the line. He sounded tired, like he hadn’t slept in a good while. My eyes stung from tears I refused to let fall. “Just wanted to know if you were planning on coming by for Thanksgiving. I love you.”