Chapter 91: I LOVE YOU

Xender's POV

I opened my eyes to her calm, sleeping face. She looked so entirely peaceful—a rare, beautiful sight I hadn't seen on her in what felt like an eternity. Reaching out a trembling hand, I gently brushed a few stray strands of hair behind her ear. The slight movement startled her in her sleep, and her eyes lazily fluttered open.

Those familiar eyes met mine, heavy with drowsiness, before she smuggled herself deeper into my embrace. She burrowed against my chest as I brought her closer, wrapping my arms tightly around her and placing a soft, lingering kiss on her hair.

But even in the warmth of the morning, a tiny knot of unease tightened in my chest. She was a little different today. From the exact moment she had violently kissed me last night, there was a shift in her eyes. And as much as I absolutely loved having her close, I couldn't shake off a haunting sense of vulnerability.

She was suddenly smiling. She was suddenly leaning into me—which was everything I had ever wanted—but beneath those sweet smiles, I could feel a cold, hidden layer of detachment she was desperately trying to mask. And that terrified me.

Her arms, wrapped fiercely around my waist, held onto me so tightly that at some points during the night, I thought she was awake, gripping me as if I were a lifeline. After what felt like an hour of just lying there, awake and staring at her, I carefully decided to go take a shower.

I gently slipped her arms from around my torso and slid out of bed, making my way into the bathroom. I needed the hot water to wake me up, to wash away the lingering ghosts of yesterday's chaos. And it did.

But the moment I stepped out of the bathroom, a towel around my waist, I found the bed completely empty.

A violent surge of panic shot straight through my veins. The air left my lungs. I rushed over to my wardrobe, frantically threw on a pair of sweatpants, and dashed downstairs in a blind search for her, my heart hammering against my ribs.

I burst into the living room, calling out her name, but the space was entirely hollow. I ran to the pool area, checked the balcony, and searched the garden, but she wasn't anywhere. My chest heaved as I checked the time; it was barely six in the morning.

A suffocating dread settled over me. It felt like she had vanished into thin air again. Then, a dark thought hit me, and I rushed back upstairs toward her ruined, portal-trashed bedroom. I pushed the door open, but there was absolutely no sign of her.

My knees went weak. I felt myself sinking toward the floor, completely overwhelmed by the terrifying thought that she was gone for good. Forcing myself back up, I stumbled back into my own bedroom to grab my cellphone, my hands shaking as I prepared to call Mike, needing to know if she had somehow shown up at his clinic in the middle of the night.

But the moment I lifted my head, my breath caught in my throat.

There she was. She was standing quietly by the window, a warm cup of coffee held between her palms. Hearing my frantic entry, she turned around to look at me, a soft, innocent smile curving her lips.

I didn't say a word. I rushed across the room, closed the distance between us, and violently pulled her into my arms, hugging her so tightly against my chest that the air left my lungs.

“Thank God you're safe,” I muttered into her shoulder, closing my eyes and crushing her even closer.

“Xender... the coffee might spill on you, and I don't want you getting burned,” I heard her say, her voice muffled against my chest.

Reluctantly, I let her pull back out of my embrace. I watched her walk over to the nightstand to drop off the mug, her questioning gaze tracking me the moment she turned around.

“Did something happen?” she asked, her eyes frantically searching my panicked expression.

“You left, and I couldn't find you,” I said, looking down as a sudden, raw wave of nervousness washed over me. Standing there, I realized I still didn't even know where I stood with her. I didn't know if she was secretly still angry with me for not believing her before.

“I was just in the kitchen making a cup of coffee,” she replied gently, a small, genuine smile lifting the corners of her mouth as she stepped closer to me. “And I was actually surprised to find that you were gone when I returned to the bed.”

When she reached out, placing a soft, warm palm against my cheek, every single ounce of my defensive guard crumbled. I leaned heavily into her touch, treating her hand like my only anchor in a storm.

“I thought you disappeared on me again,” I confessed in a quiet whisper, the truth ripping out of me. “I thought you might be suddenly angry at me again. I searched everywhere for you.” I complained like a child, wrapping my fingers around her hand before pulling her back into my arms, burying my face in her neck.

“Except for the kitchen?” she asked over my shoulder, a sudden note of amusement dancing in her voice.

I froze for a fraction of a second. I think this was the absolute first time I had ever heard her crack a joke.

A breathless laugh escaped me. “Yes... except for the kitchen.”

She let out a low, melodic giggle that filled the quiet bedroom like music. She reached up, her fingers tenderly combing through my still-damp hair, smoothing the wild strands down.

“Don't ever disappear on me again, Alda. Don't ever leave my side without letting me know,” I commanded softly. I pulled back just enough to look at her, my hands resting firmly around her waist while hers remained on my chest. I desperately needed to read her face.

She smiled, giving me a reassuring nod.

I never wanted to feel that sickening rush of adrenaline and terror ever again. I couldn't handle the dark thoughts that came with her absence.

“You're stuck with me, Alda,” I said, looking deeply into her eyes.

The moment the words left my mouth, a sharp flash of profound sadness washed over her features. It was there for only a split second before she immediately masked it, covering the pain with a bright smile as she cupped both of my cheeks in her hands.

“I never knew you could be so clingy, like a baby,” she teased, her thumbs gently caressing my skin.

“I'm sorry I didn't warn you,” I said, a soft smile breaking across my face as my eyes locked onto hers. “But when I love, I love with absolutely everything in me. And I become too clingy.”

The words hung in the air, and suddenly, Alda went entirely rigid. She stared at me in absolute shock, her lips parting slightly. I couldn't tell what had brought about such a stunned, terrified expression on her face.

“Love...?” I heard her faintly mutter.

It was only then, hearing her repeat it, that the weight of my own words hit me. My heart did a violent flip. Wait a minute... did I just confess my entire heart to her without even realizing it? Looking at her beautiful, stunned face, I realized I didn't care. I didn't want to take it back. I smiled, leaning forward to press a soft, adoring kiss right on the bridge of her nose.

“Yes,” I murmured against her skin. “I mean, isn't it completely obvious? I love you, Alda. I love you so much that it drives me crazy when I don't see you smiling at me. Whenever I look at you, it feels like I have already gotten every single thing I could ever possibly need in this life. Alda, I love—”

She cut me off completely.

Slipping into my space, she crashed her lips against mine, taking my mouth into hers with a sudden, desperate hunger. She sucked on my upper lip before moving to my lower lip, giving it a sharp, possessive bite that sent a violent wave of electricity running straight down my spine. When she pulled back just a fraction of an inch, her dazed eyes were heavy with a visible, burning desire.

“Just kiss me,” she breathed, her voice barely escaping as a desperate whisper.

I cupped her cheeks firmly in my hands, pressing my forehead against hers, our breath mingling in the small space between us. I leaned in, and she immediately closed her eyes, her lips parting slightly, ready to welcome me in. I stared at her long lashes, trailing down the slope of her nose to those beautiful, parted lips. I brushed my thumb gently across her mouth before sealing our lips together completely.

She tasted incredibly sweet. Even the bitter, dark taste of the black coffee lingering in her mouth tasted like paradise to me.

Her arms came to wrap tightly around my neck, pulling me closer as our tongues chased and played with each other, matching the frantic rhythm of our hearts. Without breaking the kiss, I hooked my hands under her thighs and picked her up effortlessly. She wrapped her legs tightly around my waist as I carried her back to the bed.

I sat down heavily on the edge of the mattress with her straddling my lap, our lips finally breaking apart as we both gasped, desperately trying to catch our breath.

Her hands slowly traveled down my bare chest, tracing a path down to my lower abdomen. Her fingers brushed against the fabric of my sweatpants, coming into contact with the part of me that was already as hard as steel—the part of me that was screaming for her.

A low, guttural groan tore from my throat, our intense gazes locked onto each other. But when she ran her hands over me again through the fabric, the last of my self-control shattered entirely. She was literally driving me insane.

“Alda,” I groaned her name, my eyes burning into hers.

I slid my hands up her thighs, moving them underneath the oversized T-shirt she was wearing. Gripping the hem, I gently but firmly pulled it up and over her head, tossing it carelessly onto the floor.

As the shirt left her body, her long, dark hair fell forward like a heavy silk curtain around her shoulders. I reached out, gently brushing the strands away from her bare breasts. I leaned down, taking one of her tight nipples into my mouth, sucking and grazing my teeth against her skin.

Her hands flew straight into my hair, her fingers gripping the strands tightly as a sharp gasp escaped her. She leaned further into me, her harsh, shallow breath hot against my neck as her soft, breathless whimpers filled my ears.

Unable to take the distance anymore, I immediately stood up from the edge of the bed, keeping her legs locked around my waist as I laid her down in the center of the mattress. In a blur of motion, what little was left of our clothes came off, falling to the floor to join the rest of the mess as we completely lost ourselves in each other.