Chapter 36: Thirty Six

Come morning, I had just come out of the student lounge, iced coffee in hand, sunlight cutting across the front steps of the building when I saw him. Declan.

Leaning against a column like he’d been waiting for me. Eyes already locked on mine.

I grinned at him slowly

He didn’t smile.

“Willow.”

My heart jumped.

I paused mid step. “Hi.” I was standing close to him, but still respectfully away. Cause we were in public.

His eyes flicked down to the coffee in my hand, then to my phone. “You’re going to meet him?”

I blinked. “Jacob?”

His jaw clenched.

“Yeah. We’ve got to finish editing our paper. We are behind and the deadline is - ”

“I know the deadline,” he cut in, his voice low and rough. “I assigned it.”

I stepped closer, glancing around. The quad was busy but not crowded. “Declan, what are you doing here?”

“I was walking back from a meeting,” he lied, badly. “Saw you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You saw me and decided to interrogate me in the middle of campus?”

His eyes darkened. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Act like you don’t know what this is. Like you don’t know what he wants.”

“He’s my friend.”

“He’s in love with you.”

I stared at him, stunned for a moment.

“You think I don’t see it?” he went on, stepping closer. “The way he looks at you like he has you? The way he touches you like it’s his right? He’s not subtle, Willow.”

My breath hitched. “That’s not fair.”

He exhaled, sharp. “It’s not fair that I have to watch it and keep my mouth shut.”

“He’s my friend. Believe me. There’s nothing there. And we decided, right? That we’d take it slow.”

“And I meant it,” he said, voice strained. “But that doesn’t mean I’m fine watching you play house with him.”

I looked away. “It’s not like that.”

“Then what is it?”

I hesitated. And in that hesitation, his expression shifted.

His voice dropped. Rougher now. “Are you sleeping with him?”

My eyes snapped back to his. “No. Jesus, Declan.”

The muscles in his jaw twitched. He looked like he wanted to break something.

“Have you kissed him?”

I hesitated. His eyes widened for a second.

“I can’t do this if you’re still letting him stay this close.”

“You don’t get to tell me who I spend time with.”

“I do,” he said, stepping even closer, “Don’t be mistaken about that. Slow, steady, whatever it is, you’re mine, now that we’re going to see each other. And I don’t take kindly to other men being around you.”

His voice wasn’t loud, but it was intense, hot enough to burn. I looked around us. People were filtering past us. To a normal person, we would just look like a student and her professor discussing something.

“And then I see you smiling at him like nothing has happened between us,” he added, eyes narrowing. “Like I don’t exist.”

I swallowed hard, chest tightening. “You don’t exist, Declan. Not here. Not in daylight. That was the agreement.”

“I didn’t agree to watch someone else have their hands on you when I can’t even acknowledge you in public.”

We stared at each other, breathing heavy. Finally, I shook my head. “You’re not being fair.”

“And you’re not being honest,” he snapped.

I opened my mouth, then closed it again.

He ran a hand down his face, stepping back, frustration radiating off him like heat.

“I’m not asking you to stand on rooftops and declare anything,” he said, quieter now. “I’m just asking you to stop pretending he belongs in a space…that’s meant for me. Just…” He ran his fingers through his hair, frustrated, “Fuck, Willow, you’re making this so hard for me.”

I didn’t reply. I couldn’t.

Not with the ache in my throat. Not with the crowd milling behind us. I nodded at him, and began to walk away.

“Willow,” he called after me, voice lower now. Less sharp. I didn’t stop.

But he caught up anyway, of course he did. One long stride and he was next to me again, fingers grazing my elbow like he wanted to grab it, but didn’t dare.

“Wait. Please.”

I stopped walking, jaw tight, breath catching. I turned to face him, slowly.

“You don’t get to throw words like that at me and then follow me like nothing happened.”

“I didn’t mean to…” he trailed off, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. “I’m not handling this well, I know.”

I stared at him, voice quiet but hard. “You’re jealous. And instead of owning it like a normal human being, you tried to shame me.”

His expression cracked, he looked incredulous. “I’m not trying to shame you.”

“You basically asked if I was sleeping with Jacob,” I snapped. “Do you have any idea how much that hurt? Is that what you think of me?”

He exhaled harshly. “I’m going crazy here, Willow. Every time I see him next to you, touching you like he owns even an inch of you, it makes me feel like I’m going mad. It makes me want to bash his head in and put you over my shoulder and take you right there in front of him.”

That stopped me.

My heart stumbled in my chest.

“I’m not… with him like that,” I said, voice quieter now. “But we’re still figuring things out, right?”

Declan’s eyes darkened again not with anger, but desperation.

“You’re not something I’m figuring out, Willow. You’re it. You have me. All of me. And I want all of you.”

My throat tightened. “I can’t keep pretending nothing’s happening between us when everything is.”

He stepped closer. His voice dropped. “Then don’t pretend. Not with me.”

“I need more than words.”

“I know.”

Silence stretched between us again, thick and trembling.

And then, finally, he said it:

“Leave him.”

My breath hitched.

“Declan - ”

“End whatever it is you’re doing with him. I can’t stand on the sidelines anymore. I won’t. If we’re going to do this, then I want you all in. Not halfway.”

I sighed, “Okay. All in?”

He finally smiled. “All in.”