Chapter 124: Hundred and Twenty Four

The office felt different after the retreat. Maybe it was me who felt different, like I’d left some hidden part of myself behind on that trip, and now walking back into these gray walls, into familiar corridors, was like wearing shoes that didn’t fit anymore.

I tried to bury myself in work, but my mind was restless. Even more so, to see Declan.

And then, Noah’s questions rang in my head like a siren.

I knew what Jacob had heard in those questions. I knew the look in his eyes as he sat there, silent and furious.

So when I turned the corner of the hall and nearly collided with Declan, my heart betrayed me. It stuttered, leapt, and then ached all at once.

“Willow,” he said softly, steadying me with a hand against my arm. His touch was warm, grounding. I should have pulled away. I didn’t.

“Sorry,” I breathed, stepping back, though I could still feel his hand on my skin, even though it was no longer on me. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

He searched my face, his gaze sweeping over me, trying to read me. “Are you okay?”

The question lodged in my throat. No one had asked me that in days. Not sincerely. Not like this.

“I’m fine,” I lied, clutching my folder tighter. But he didn’t look convinced.

We ended up in the small break room, alone, making ourselves coffee. I set the folder down, my fingers trembling against the paper, and before I could gather my defenses, Declan spoke.

“I saw you,” he said quietly, “with him.”

My breath caught. “With who?”

“With Noah.” His voice softened, like he was holding the words carefully; his eyes softened too. “The other day. You were walking him back from the bus stop. He was holding your hand. And I…” He stopped, ran a hand through his hair, exhaled hard. “I can’t stop thinking about it.”

My chest tightened. “Oh.”

He shook his head. “No, let me say this. Please.” His eyes met mine, steady and unflinching. “It wasn’t just seeing you. It was seeing him. That little boy with your smile, looking up at you like you hung the moon. And I realized something I can’t push away anymore.”

He stepped closer, his voice rough with emotion. “I don’t just want you, Willow. I want him too. I want to be there. To be in his life. I can’t pretend otherwise. Not after seeing the two of you together.”

The air between us shifted, thick, heavy. I gripped the counter behind me to stay upright, my knees threatening to give.

“You don’t understand,” I whispered, my throat feeling full. “It’s not that simple.”

His expression didn’t falter. “I know it’s not simple. I know Jacob complicates everything. But I’m not afraid of him. I’m not afraid of the mess, or what it’ll take. I just… I want to start over. With you. With him. With whatever you’ll give me.”

My eyes burned. I turned away, staring at the coffee machine as if it could offer me an escape. The words tangled inside me, a war between fear and longing.

“You can’t just say things like that,” I said, my voice breaking. “Do you know what you’re asking me to risk? Jacob.” I swallowed hard, lowering my voice. “He doesn’t let things go. He notices everything. If he even suspects something -”

“I don’t care about him,” Declan cut in, his voice fierce. “I’m not asking for you to sneak around. I care about you. About Noah. And I can’t stand by and pretend I don’t. Not anymore.”

Tears pressed against my lashes, hot and relentless. “You make it sound so easy. Like I can just walk away.”

“Not easy,” he said, softer now. “But possible.” He took another step, close enough that I could feel the heat of him, the warmth of his body wrapping around me like it always used to. “Willow, I lost you once. I let you go, and I’m not making that mistake again.”

My heart cracked. His words, his proximity. Because part of me wanted to believe him. Part of me ached to imagine a life where Declan and I were together. The love of my life. Our little baby.

But guilt clawed at me too. Jacob had raised Noah, he was his father in all the ways the counted, provided.. What kind of betrayal would it be to undo that? To even let my heart wander toward Declan when I was still under Jacob’s roof? I owed so much to him.

“I can’t,” I whispered, shaking my head, though my voice betrayed the crack in my resolve. “I can’t do this to him. To any of us.”

Declan’s jaw tightened, but his eyes softened. “You’re not betraying him by wanting something better. By wanting to be happy. By letting yourself be loved.” His voice lowered, “You were made for me. You know that.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, fighting the tears, fighting the way his words pierced through every wall I’d built.

“I’m scared,” I admitted, the truth trembling out of me before I could stop it. “When Jacob finds out…I don’t know what he’d do.”

Declan’s hand hovered, hesitant, before he gently brushed his fingers against mine where they clutched the counter. The touch was barely there, but it sent a jolt through me all the same.

“Then let me be the one who’s not afraid,” he said, his voice steady, unwavering. “Let me carry that, Willow. You’ve carried too much alone for too long.”

My whole body shuddered. My heart was split open between fear and hope, between loyalty and longing. And for the first time in years, I let myself imagine it, what it would feel like to stop pretending.

Declan. My Declan.

I pulled my hand back, because if I didn’t, I’d collapse into him completely.

“I can’t give you an answer,” I whispered, my voice raw. “Not now. Not yet.”

His eyes searched mine, and for a moment, I thought I’d see disappointment. But instead, he nodded, as though he understood more than I could say.

“I’ll wait,” he said simply. “As long as it takes. Just… don’t shut me out. Don’t pretend this isn’t real.”

I swallowed hard, blinking back tears. “I can’t promise anything.”

“You don’t have to,” he murmured. “I already know.”

And then he stepped back, giving me space, leaving me trembling in the silence he left behind.

I pressed a hand to my chest, feeling my heart beat against my palm, uneven and wild.

For the first time in years, beneath all the guilt and fear, a small part of me dared to pulse with something else.

Hope.