Chapter 89

He scowled at her. “My feelings have nothing to do with this.”

“Oookay,” she agreed verbally, if not intellectually. “You behaved badly.

You admit that. Why cut me a check afterward unless you intended it to be an apology? You must have felt some guilt.”

He ignored the emphasis she’d put on the word “felt.” Stepping back from her—since his stance had so obviously been another indication of his emotions—he tugged on the hem of his tux jacket and said, “Guilt had nothing to do with it. You were desperate and I took advantage of that. My behavior was…” obviously he had to search for a word that didn’t imply guilt “…dishonorable.”

Honor was a priority for him. Unlike most men she’d known, who never gave such things a second thought. He clearly had his own code of ethics, and that fierce sense of right and wrong was one of the things she’d loved best about him.

“I’m glad you still care about things like that,” she mused aloud.

He sent her a piercing look. “Despite my recent behavior, I’m not a monster.”

“I didn’t say you were.” She’d thought his behavior was less monstrous and more wounded. But of course the last time she’d suggested that, he’d responded by propositioning her. So this time around she kept her mouth shut.

It took a great deal of willpower on her part not to point out that he must have felt guilty—or perhaps ashamed of himself—for behaving in a way he saw as dishonorable. If she’d expected him to say more, she’d have been disappointed. He merely made a noncommittal grunting noise, as he pulled his ID tag from his pocket and swiped it over the pad to the right of the glass door. With a faint “swooshing” sound, the door latch released, and with a gallant sweep of his arm he gestured for her to enter.

“So you can get into any office in the building?” she asked.

“Pretty much.”

She followed him through the reception area and down the hall to an office just past the one she’d met him in the other day. This office was more utilitarian than his had been, with a bank of computers lining one wall and a couple of office chairs. “I appreciate you taking the time to check on this.”

“This is my job. I’m not doing it for you.” He sat himself down in front of one of the computer monitors and jiggled the mouse to wake up the computer.

She lowered herself to the spare chair. “Good point. Still, I know this can’t be easy for you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He shot her a look over his shoulder.

“Just that you’d probably rather be doing something else. Given how you feel about me.”

“I don’t feel anything for you,” he said blankly. “You’re nothing to me.”

She should have let it go. She really should have. But as the computer whirled to life in front of them, she found herself saying, “No, I’m not. We were in love, for goodness’ sake. That’s not nothing.”

“You mean nothing to me,” he repeated more slowly.

“Don’t talk to me like that.”

“Like what?” he asked innocently.

“Like that. As if I’m the one acting like an idiot, not you.”

“I’m not—” But she didn’t let him defend himself.

“I ran into an old boyfriend back in Quinley. We went out for coffee. He showed me pictures of his kids.”

“Do you have a point?” he practically growled.

“My point is this. To him, I mean nothing. And you know how I know?”

Nolan slanted a look at her. “No.”

“That right there.” She waggled her finger in the direction of his face. “I know he doesn’t care about me anymore because he never once looked at me like that.”

“Like what?” he asked in a beleaguered voice.

“Like half the time you’re wishing you could strangle me and the other half you’re trying to figure out where you’d hide the body if you did.”

“That’s not what I’m thinking.” As he said the words, he gave her a searing look. A sort of, I-want-you-naked-now look, as if he could peel off her clothes with pure telekinetic power. Her skin prickled as her body was flooded with molten heat.

“That is not the look of a man emotionally uninvolved,” she said.

“Just drop it.”

She rolled her eyes in exaggerated exasperation. “Oh, I’m sorry. Is this conversation getting too personal for you? Am I stepping all over those feelings you swear you don’t have for me?”

“Leave it alone, Candace.”

And with that, she heard the pain pinned beneath his words. There was a faint tremor in his voice. No, nothing as strong as a tremor. Just the faintest bit of huskiness that told her the words had been hard for him to say. She heard it when he said her name. And her heart broke all over again.

Before she could stop herself, she reached out and put her hand on his arm. “You are too damn proud.”

Time seemed to freeze, the moment telescoping, so that the whole world narrowed down to just the two of them. Then he broke eye contact and did something or other on the computer.

“Let’s just drop it.”

His rebuff stung more than it should have. Damn it, she didn’t want to get sucked back in. That was so not part of her plan. To hide her vulnerability, she teased him. “Oh, have I hurt your feelings again?”

“No, just drop it because I just noticed that the camera is out on the eleventh floor.”

“One of the cameras is out?” She sounded breathless with fear. “Then something is happening.”

“Not necessarily,” he said to reassure her, though his own internal alarm was jangling.

He pulled out his phone and dialed the extension for the second-floor office. The guard who should have been stationed there didn’t pick up. Nolan clicked the mouse a couple of times, closing windows and logging out of a program before pushing his chair back and standing up. “It’s probably nothing,” he added to remind himself and her. “Every once in a while a camera just goes out.”

“I thought you said this was the best security system on the market.”

“I said Messina Diamonds has the best security system on the market. Not all our clients can afford the best. The eleventh floor is Lee, Oban and Associates, a law firm. Their system is merely very good. But even the best system can suffer from a technical glitch. It’s why we have redundant systems.”