Chapter 51

“She says she’s turned over a new leaf, Candace.”

“That sounds familiar.”

“Ha, ha. She wants to spend time with us. To get to know us again.”

“That does not sound familiar. How much time?”

“I…wasn’t real clear on that.”

“Oh my God.”

“She does look different, anyway. She’s wearing a normal nice sundress, no cleavage, no bared legs, but it’s not a flower-child hippie caftan, either. It looks like it could have come from Talbots.”

“Oh my God.” She paced harder, tapping her fist against her lower lip. “Where is she planning on staying?”

“You don’t want to know.”

“Oh my—”

“Candace? You’d make me feel a whole lot better if you’d say something helpful instead of ‘Oh my God.’”

“Yes. Sorry. I’m just…” she whirled around, clasping her head with her free hand “…trying to take this in.”

“I know! I was sitting at desk. I looked up and there she was. I nearly had a heart attack. Hang on. Be out in a second.”

“Out?”

“I’m in the bathroom. I wanted to warn you where she couldn’t hear me.”

“Thank you. I guess.”

“Oh, I think she’s talked to Gran and Grandad recently, too. Something she said made me think she had.”

“What did—”

“I really have to go. Talk to you later.”

“Michelle, thanks for the—” the phone clicked off “—warning.”

One more time: Oh my God. She dropped the phone and wandered in a daze back to her half-cleaned windows. Three minutes later, she’d gone no farther than staring at the one she’d been in the middle of squeegeeing when Michelle called.

What was she going to do? About anything? Michelle, Gran and Grandad, Nolan and now Mom. Only Andrew seemed to be doing so well on his own… Away from them. Maybe that was what she was supposed to do — follow in their brother's footsteps.

Candace felt responsible for everyone's happiness and she didn’t know what to do to guarantee any of it. She couldn’t remember the last time she wasn't worried about a member of her family. She was terrified Michelle was going to go for this Stoner person over poor lovesick Nick. She was terrified Gran and Grandad would go downhill if she weren’t there to take care of them, no matter how often Michelle and Nolan said they didn’t need her. She was terrified Nolan’s heart would break if she left town. And what did Mom want? Reconciliation? Disappearing years ago and now waltzing back in and expecting to take up where she left off? Was Candace supposed to bury all her resentment to make Mom happy, too?

Candace groaned and dropped her head into her hands. Back to where she started from. What did Candace want? She wanted to talk to Nolan. He picked up after the first ring. Hearing his voice made her shaky with relief and teary and happy and sad at the same time. Love was just plain screwed up.

“Hey, there.” He sounded so glad to hear from her that her shakiness began to steady into warmth. “What’s going on?”

“Where do I start?”

“Uh-oh, that bad? Hang on, I’m in my car, let me pull over.”

“You on your way home? It can wait.”

“No, I’m on my way downtown to meet with the foundation board of directors.”

“Doh.” She whacked herself in the forehead. “I’m sorry, I knew that. You don’t need me bothering you. Seriously, I’m fine, I don’t—”

“You don’t think you’re more important to me than some board of directors?”

“Oh.” She closed her eyes, surprised she could continue to stand upright since she’d just turned into goo. “Well…okay. My mom is in town. She’s decided to reinsert herself into our lives.”

“Whoa.” He whistled. “That’s intense. I take it you’re not in the mood to let her in?”

“I’m…no. I guess I’m really not.” Her voice trembled; she felt a retroactive burst of anger. “But even though she rejected us, I feel like I can’t reject her. She’s my mom.”

“So on top of Michelle going nuts over another idiot, and me making your life miserable—”

“Ha.” She fell back onto her bed, managing a smile even though not a single one of her problems had been solved. “You don’t make me miserable.”

“Well, that’s progress.”

She giggled. She’d never thought of herself as a giggler, but Nolan had turned her into one. Could she really stand moving to that hot buggy state and that small soulless condo and living life for her grandparents? Could she really stand to stay here and ignore their eventual decline?

“All you owe her, Candace, is to listen. You’re an adult. It’s up to you whether you want her back in your life or not. I’d be willing to bet she knows that, and knows she’s been a pretty piss-poor mother. It’s brave of her to show up and try to make it right. Maybe if you thought about it that way…”

She breathed in until her shoulders nearly touched her ears. He was right. He was very right. And very wise. And she was crazy about him.

“Yes. I’ll try that. It might help, thank you.”

“And if she turns out to be looking for money or some other handout you don’t want to give her, let me know and I’ll send some boys to work her over.”

Candace burst out laughing. “Nothing like a good pounding to help people see your point of view?”

“That’s what I’ve always said. Though it hasn’t worked on you yet.”

“Ha. You’re hardly a pounder.” She rolled over onto her stomach, stroked the pillow as if he were there with her.

“Not even a quarter pounder?”

She laughed helplessly. Even his stupid jokes were funny to her. She had it bad. “Thank you, Nolan. I really do feel better.”

“I’m glad.” He was glad, she could hear it in his voice—his pain for her, his caring, his empathy. Did she mention she was crazy about him?

“Good luck with your complete rubber stamp of a job interview today.”

“I don’t even think there’s another candidate. My dad…” He snorted. “Well, I’m going to do a really good job. I’m not sure it’s the job he thinks I’m going to do, but…”

“Can you get the foundation board on your side for the change of course?”

“I have a pretty good chance. I did research and most of them support the arts community in Quinley in some way or the other, either privately or through their companies. I ’ll go slowly at first. Get them behind this one project while continuing on our same path for now.”