Chapter 40 – Innermost Affection (Ivy’s POV)
My throat worked, words catching. What did I want?
Everything.
Nothing.
Things I had no right to ask for.
“I need you, Ivy,” I said at last, voice raw. The naked admission hung in the air between us. Her eyes widened in disbelief.
Before she could respond, I released her hand and reached up to cup her cheek with my good hand. She stiffened, but I brushed my thumb over her cheekbone, wiping away a dried speck of something—blood or soot, I wasn’t sure. “Stay with me tonight,” I murmured, my rough voice almost pleading. “Just for tonight.”
Ivy’s throat bobbed as she swallowed hard. “Damian, I…” She closed her eyes, and I braced for a rejection. Instead, she slowly placed her hand over mine where it rested on her face. Then she turned her head and pressed the slightest kiss to my palm, a trembling sign of consent.
It was all I needed.
Carefully, I tugged her closer. Ivy perched on the edge of the bed, her hip against my thigh. I could feel the fine tremor that ran through her. Perhaps she was afraid—perhaps I was too.
My heart pounded as I brought her hand from my chest down to my abdomen. Her soft fingertips grazed the band of my loose drawstring pants and I sucked in a breath. Desire flared through me, dulling my pain and making my head swim.
“I hear you could have taken off but you saved Elias’ life instead today.” I said, breaking the hush. “Elias told me what you did.” Her hand twitched in mine—surprise flickering across her face.
“I-I didn’t want anyone else to die,” she whispered.
A wry smile tugged at my lips. Even now, she wouldn’t admit to caring. Stubborn woman. But the flush creeping up her neck and the way she stayed so very still spoke volumes.
My gaze roamed her face—smudged with soot, a small cut on her lower lip. Battle-worn and beautiful. I leaned forward, biting back a groan as stitches pulled, and pressed my forehead to hers. Ivy inhaled sharply but didn’t pull away.
“Thank you,” I breathed, the words inadequate but necessary.
She looked at me with confusion and something like shy pride. I had no idea how to voice the emotions snarled inside me. So I didn’t try.
“Ivy,” I murmured, tilting her chin up. “Look at me.”
She hadn’t realized she’d dropped her gaze. Now those lashes lifted and I found myself staring into molten gold flecked with green. The firelight reflected in her eyes made them mesmerizing.
My thumb traced over her lower lip, which trembled under my touch. “I want to hear you say you need me too,” I whispered.
Ivy’s breath hitched. Her body was rigid with tension atop the bed, and I could see the conflict in her face. Words still seemed to fail her. Instead of answering, she let action speak: she leaned in and pressed her lips to mine.
Relief and longing surged through me as I returned her gentle kiss. Her free hand found my jaw, holding me in place as if afraid I’d vanish. A low groan of contentment rumbled in my chest. God, her sweetness could drown me.
She melted into the kiss, soft and seeking. I tugged her fully onto the bed, careful of my injuries, until she straddled my lap. Ivy moved slowly, mindful not to jostle me, her nightgown rucking up around her thighs. The warmth of her body sank through the thin fabric of my pants, igniting every nerve.
A quiet moan escaped her when she felt the evidence of my arousal against her leg. Her concern for my well-being warred with evident desire in her eyes. “This might…hurt you,” she murmured breathlessly.
“It hurts worse when you’re not here,” I found myself replying, voice barely audible. Her eyes widened, and something inside her seemed to give way.
She answered me with another fervent kiss, this one deeper and more assured. Our tongues met in languid strokes that made my head spin. The last of her hesitation slipped away as we clung to each other.
I slid my palms up her thighs, gathering the hem of her nightdress. Understanding, Ivy broke the kiss and pulled the garment over her head in one motion. She tossed it aside and knelt astride me, bare and breathtaking. Firelight caressed her curves, glinted off a sheen of sweat on her skin. I drank in the sight, my breath catching at her beauty.
Flushing, she moved to cover herself with one arm, suddenly shy. Gently, I caught her wrist. “Don’t,” I whispered. “You’re perfect.”
Her cheeks flamed, but she obeyed, letting me look. My pants had become painfully tight. Ivy seemed to notice; with trembling fingers, she reached down and tugged at my drawstring.
I lifted my hips with a hiss as she eased the soft fabric down. My rigid length sprang free, and Ivy’s eyes flickered to it, then back to my face. I saw a hint of wonder—and perhaps eagerness—there.
I grasped her hips and guided her forward. The tip of me brushed her slick folds, drawing twin gasps from us.
“Take me inside you,” I urged softly. “Please.”
She gave a tiny nod, biting her lip in focus. Keeping most of her weight on her knees, Ivy positioned herself and began to sink down slowly. A strangled groan escaped me as scorching tightness enveloped my tip and beyond. Inch by inch, she took me, stretching to accommodate my girth.
At one point her brow knitted and a pained sigh fell from her lips. I gripped her hips, ready to stop. “Are you okay?” I managed through clenched teeth.
Ivy exhaled shakily, then nodded. “I-I'm okay,” she whispered, a faint, relieved laugh following. “It…doesn’t hurt as much as last time.”
Thank the goddess.
Guilt eased from my shoulders and I carefully pulled her down into my arms, capturing her lips to swallow her remaining whimpers.
She came willingly into my arms, and in the quiet of the night we found a gentle move. Ivy moved carefully atop me, mindful of my wounds, but with each rise and fall of her hips we climbed higher together. Our soft gasps and murmured words of need mingled with the crackle of the hearth. Each slow movement drew us closer to the precipice. When her body finally tensed in release and she cried my name, I let myself go as well — pulling her down against me as a shuddering wave of pleasure crashed over us both.
Slowly, reality returned. Ivy slumped against my chest, both of us trembling and spent. I wrapped my arm around her, holding her close as our racing hearts gradually calmed.
After a long moment, Ivy lifted her head and met my gaze. There was wonder in her eyes, and a hint of a smile on her kiss-swollen lips.
Eventually, I pressed a gentle kiss to her brow. “Get some sleep, Ivy,” I murmured, voice thick with tenderness and exhaustion.
She sighed contentedly and curled into me. I listened as her breathing evened out, her body relaxed and safe in my arms.