Chapter 20: I'm Doomed

ALMA

I can’t believe him. He actually picked up Luis’s call. He told me to switch off my phone—and yet he didn’t. What if Luis heard me? What if he knows every detail?

My hands gripped the wheel so tight my knuckles ached. My heart throbbed, fast and ragged, bleeding in sync with every mile I drove. I know I’m losing my mind. Making him love me was impossible—but I can't help it. Why does it feel like my entire world revolves around him? And why… why does it seem like he doesn’t even notice?

I can’t earn my husband’s love. I can’t even earn his. Maybe… maybe I’m just not capable of receiving love at all.

I drove home in silence, the weight of my thoughts pressing down with every turn of the wheel. When I walked into the house, my legs were shaking as I made my way upstairs, and tears slipped down uncontrollably. I could not even tell why I was crying. Was it because he didn’t switch off his phone? Because he didn't tell me what they talked about. Or because he declared it impossible for him to love me?

I picked up my jotter and flipped to the page where I had written everything I wanted to do with him. A bitter laugh escaped me—how foolish I had been. I tore the page out and shredded it into pieces, letting the fragments flutter to the floor as tears streamed down my face.

I’m done with all of this—with him, with men. I’ll focus on getting a job and saving up for my father’s medication.

I’m done with these rich people. They’re too complicated, too impossible.

A week had passed since I last saw or heard from Sebastian. I hadn’t even gone for my scheduled checkup. I blocked and deleted his number in anger—now, in more composed moments, I realize I overreacted. Still, there was no way I would go back and ask for his number again. I wasn’t that desperate.

Yet my mind refused to rest. Everywhere I turned, I imagined his presence. Every man on the street looked like him.

I couldn’t focus on my daily activities. My body moved through the days, but my thoughts were trapped somewhere else—stuck on a man I swore I was done with.

I had decided to take up a new hobby rather than stay trapped up in that big, empty house day and night with no one to talk to.

I resolved to register at a nearby gym. I needed to keep myself fit, strengthen my body, and maybe—even just a little—meet new people.

“Hi, I’m Nick. And you?” a man said, standing beside me on the treadmill. He was well-built, good-looking… and disturbingly reminiscent of Sebastian. I shook my head quickly. Why does everyone look like him? My mind was playing cruel games, and I hated that my body was reacting.

“Alma,” I replied slowly, trying to focus on the machine beneath my feet.

“Actually, I’m new here… and new in town,” he continued, holding out his phone to me, silently asking for my number. “I don’t have many friends yet.”

“I’m sorry, I’m married,” I replied flatly.

He chuckled and pinched the tip of his nose. “Fair enough. A beautiful woman like you wouldn’t stay single,” he said.

I didn’t flinch. I was done with men’s games.

“Still… I need a friend here,” he pressed.

I sighed in frustration and stopped the treadmill. Because of him, I was ending my workout thirty minutes early. Without hesitation, I picked up my bag and turned to face him.

“When we pass by each other again, I’ll give you my number,” I said.

He chuckled and shook his head in amusement. I rolled my eyes and dashed out of the gym.

I had come here to meet new people, but at the same time… I didn’t want to talk to anyone, especially handsome men; they will just toy with your feelings.

I drove home and froze the moment I saw Sebastian’s car parked in the driveway. My body went rigid. Slowly, I walked toward the door, my mind racing. Why was he here? What was going on?

I eased the door open and stepped inside, my knees threatening to buckle at the sight before me.

Sebastian and Luis were sitting at the bar counter.

Luis had returned? When and why wasn't I aware of it?

I took slow, trembling steps towards them. What were they discussing? Luis looked furious—had Sebastian told him about us?

“Luis…” I called out softly, my heart racing with fear.

Both of them turned to face me. In that instant, Luis dropped the glass he had been holding and strode toward me, eyes blazing.

"Where on earth are you coming from, Alma?" he demanded, his breath uneven.

My gaze shifted to Sebastian, who was calmly sipping his wine with his gaze fixed on me. I swallowed hard and looked away.

“I… I… went to the gym,” I whispered, gesturing weakly at my bag so he could see my outfit.

He grabbed the bag from me and dropped it to the floor. My body shuddered from the force of his rage.

“Don’t you dare lie to me, Alma! Who the hell was that man you were with?” His tone was sharp and accusing.

My heart dropped, and my gaze shifted to Sebastian. His gaze was fixed on us, firm and unreadable, as if he were watching a battle that he couldn't—or wouldn't—intervene in.

"What the hell…" Luis muttered, his gaze shifting to Sebastian before returning to mine. “It’s… Sebastian?” His words hit me like a punch, and my knees buckled beneath me.

Everything seemed to come to a halt as I stared at Luis. His eyes were locked on mine, and I felt like he could see straight into me.

Sebastian stood up and walked towards us. His face was calm, his hands tucked into his pockets, as if nothing unusual had occurred.

"Luis, what if I'm the one?" he asked.

My heart stopped. My eyes widened. I couldn’t move.

One thing is certain: I am doomed.