Chapter 73: Doubt

I felt a shiver rush through me at Elias' sweet words and tender touch. It was definitely going to take a lot for me to get used to him being like this.

"I think I will go find a healer." Tristan said slowly, drawing my attention to him.

"You don't have to." I said, quickly blushing ferociously. "I'm really okay."

I was okay, truly. However, I wasn't going to be okay. I had almost forgotten what I had been told about slowly dying. That meant that eventually I would start to show signs of the end, and I wasn't sure how Elias would take it.

"What's wrong?" The man in question asked, immediately catching on to my discomfort. "Do you feel uncomfortable anywhere?"

"I'm fine." I assured him, plastering on a fake smile. "I just want to be able to go back to Allsbrook."

For now, I simply wanted to go back to the place that had become my home and spend the rest of the time I had left with Elias. I didn't want to have to worry about a major battle or about having to kill someone.

"Soon," Elias said, smirking. "We just need to give it a few days for things to calm down so that we can escape undetected."

"A few days?" I could feel my eyes growing wide as his words sank in. "What are we supposed to do until then to keep from being found?"

"I've already told you that this hut is well hidden." He reminded me. "And Tristan has made sure I've stayed stocked up on supplies. For now, just focus on recuperating and let Tristan and I worry about everything else."

Let them worry... What kind of person would that make me? I couldn't let them bear the brunt of what needed to be done alone. Especially when I knew that, in the end, all of this was my fault. The curse, us being trapped—everything was because of me.

"I can't let both of you put yourselves in danger because of me." I pointed out, sucking in a breath. "I am just as involved; actually, I'm more involved."

"You don't have to try to play the hero." Elias pointed out, giving me a soft smile. "You've already been through enough."

Though he only intended to try to help me feel better, I couldn't stop the pang I felt at the thought of being left out.

"Please." I asked, my voice barely a whisper. "Don't leave me out of whatever it is the both of you plan to do."

I couldn't handle not knowing what was going on or what could possibly happen. I loved Elias, and no matter what, I wanted to fight by his side. I also didn't want Tristan to have to take the brunt of whatever came due to his betrayal alone.

Closing my eyes, I tried to collect my thoughts and feelings. I needed to be strong, and I needed to be the brave mage I once was. I couldn't be this weak human version of myself any longer.

"How about we sleep on it?" Elias suggested as I opened my eyes and met his gaze.

"I think that's my cue to head out." Tristan muttered, giving a small nod. "I'll come back tomorrow."

Turning, he didn't wait for a response before he quickly headed out of the hut, not giving Elias or me a chance to argue or ask him to stay.

Feeling my breath hitch in my throat, I continued to look in the direction that he had disappeared before finally turning and facing Elias.

Though I had been alone with him many times, this time immediately felt different. I could feel butterflies bursting forth in my stomach as my heart rate picked up. Just from the simple act of him staring at me, my skin flushed and my core throbbed. How in the world could I be this shameless after everything?

"Are you embarrassed?" He asked, moving forward and wrapping his arms around my waist. "We've been together how many times?"

There were too many for me to keep count, but that didn't matter. All those other times, I had one-sided feelings for this man. Now that I knew how he felt, that in itself made things different.

"Don't turn away from me." Elias murmured, placing a hand on my cheek and forcing me to meet his hungry gaze. "We've been apart for too long, and I want to fully take you in."

Gasping, I didn't have time to react as his head ducked down so his lips could gently meet mine. At first, it was just a light, soft peck, but soon it turned more insistent and more hungry. Letting a small groan escape me, I found my arms snaking around his neck as my lips parted, allowing his tongue to enter my mouth and dance against my own.

"God, I've missed you." Elias growled, clutching my ass and lifting me so that he could carry me to a nearby bed. "So damn much."

Gently laying me down, he began to trail kisses along my skin, starting at my neck and working down to my collar bone. His fingers, which trembled, trailed along my leg, taunting me just above my clothing. Closing my eyes, I luxuriated in the feelings that the man was giving me, but I couldn't stop the small voice in the back of my head that asked if it was truly me that he missed or simply my body. Were his words false, or was he confused by the longing he had for the physical desire that he felt for me? And before I could stop the doubt, I felt myself tense.

"What's wrong?" He asked, sitting up straight enough so he could look into my eyes.

Blushing, I tried to simply smile as I shook my head. How in the world could I possibly voice my thoughts without offending him?

"If there's something on your mind, you should say it." He continued, clearly determined to pry whatever was wrong out of me. "I can't know what you're thinking if you don't tell me."

"Can't you simply read my thoughts?" I asked, remembering the few times that he had mind linked with me.

"I don't want to pry." He admitted, causing my heart to clench in instant guilt. "I'd prefer you were honest with me."

How in the world could I possibly sit here and think the worst of him when he had done nothing but been completely honest with me from the very beginning?

"Alright," I sighed, deciding it was better to have all my doubts and fears out in the open. "I'll tell you what's wrong with me; will you listen?"