Still my home
Ashlyn
“I’ll think about what you said… But right now, I can’t go with you. I need to talk to Sandro first.”
Marco’s hand reached for my arm, gripping gently, but firmly enough that I could feel the heat of his skin. I didn’t try to pull away. Deep down, I wanted to feel that warmth again. I needed it, if only for a moment, if only to remind myself what it used to feel like.
His jaw clenched tightly, and in his eyes, I saw something fragile. Hope, maybe, or desperation. He was bracing himself for the pain he already knew was coming.
“Sweet... you’re my wife,” he said, his voice trembling. “You’re my real wife. Ashley deceived us, twisted everything between us. Please… don’t do this to me.”
I gave a slight shrug, not from cold but from the weight of his words, words that stirred memories too painful to ignore.
“We were separated for a long time, Marco. And even if we try to deny it, we both know… having a child with my twin changes things. It cuts deeper than either of us can admit.”
His lips remained shut, but his eyes, those tortured eyes spoke of regret, anger, and self-hatred.
“Sweet, please…”
I shook my head, pressing my hand to my chest as if trying to hold the broken pieces of my heart together. “Let me think. Don’t ask me to just forget everything. I lived two whole years as Ashley. I got hurt as Ashley. And now you want me to just... drop all of that? Like it doesn’t matter just because you’re here again?”
“That’s not what I mean,” he said quickly, stepping closer. “I’m not asking you to forget. I’m asking you to let me stay with you. Whatever pain you’re carrying… let me carry it with you. Let me show you that my love for you never changed. It never left.”
A bitter laugh escaped my lips. “Marco, love isn’t always enough to fix everything. This isn’t a movie. Some wounds… some wounds don’t heal just because you hold me.”
He took a deep breath, his gaze locking into mine like he was trying to read every thought, every secret emotion I had buried.
“Just tell me… tell me nothing is going on between you and Sandro, and I swear, I’ll leave you alone.”
My breath caught in my throat. His question wasn’t just a question, it was a dagger, sharp and unforgiving, ready to tear through whatever was left of my resolve.
I couldn’t speak.
Should I tell the truth? Or lie to protect him… or myself?
No. That wasn’t the right question.
The real question was… will I go with him or not?
“I know everything that happened between us was painful. But I never meant for it to happen that way,” Marco said softly, his voice laced with remorse. “You don’t know how many nights I blamed myself. I still do. I feel like such a fool… letting Ashley manipulate me like that.”
His eyes glistened, and in them, I saw not just guilt, but the helplessness of a man who had lost his way. There was a plea in his gaze… not just for forgiveness, but for a second chance.
I love this man. God, I love him more than anything. No one else could take his place. Even when I tried to shut him out of my heart, it refused to forget him. Even when I tried to teach myself to love Sandro… it never worked. Because Marco was different. I used to breathe for him. I still do.
But what will happen… when he finds out I can’t bear children?
That’s always been his dream, hasn’t it? A big, happy family. Children running through the house, laughter in the mornings, kisses goodnight.
I have to tell him now. I can’t let him keep hoping for something I can’t give.
“Please… come back to me, Sweet,” he whispered. “I want to build the family we dreamed of. With you. Only you.”
I swallowed hard.
Here it is.
The one thing I was most afraid to hear from him.
The word family.
Suddenly, the air felt colder. My fingers gripped the hem of my shirt, trying to stop the trembling that was rising within me.
“Asher’s with me,” he said, voice quivering. “I couldn’t abandon him. He’s innocent… he didn’t ask for any of this. But I promise, I swear, when we have our own child, I’ll love them equally. No one will be treated differently.”
I lowered my head, playing with my frozen fingers. I couldn’t delay this any longer.
“I can’t get pregnant, Marco."
Silence.
No words. Not even a breath.
I slowly lifted my gaze.
He was staring at me. Not blinking. Not moving. Just… frozen. Like the words hadn’t landed yet, or maybe they had, and he didn’t know what to do with them.
“You wanted a big family,” I added, voice barely above a whisper. “And I… I can’t give you that.”
I expected him to turn away. To walk out. To say nothing and leave me standing in the emptiness of my truth.
But instead, he reached for me again. This time, his grip was firmer. Warmer. More certain.
He pulled me close, eyes boring into mine.
“As long as I have you, that’s all that matters,” he said. No hesitation. No second-guessing. “If you want to adopt, we’ll adopt. If you don’t, that’s okay too. Let’s take care of your baby and Asher… if that’s okay with you. You’re what matters to me, Sweet.”
I was stunned. Words caught in my throat. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t even breathe.
Was he serious? Or was this pity? Was he only saying this so I wouldn’t feel even more broken?
“If you’re going to hold this against me someday—”
“I won’t,” he cut in, sharp but tender. “I’m not saying it doesn’t matter. But it doesn’t compare to the pain I’ve caused you. I don’t even deserve to be here… not after what I’ve done. Not after having a child with another woman.”
“M-Marco…”
“I love you, Sweet. I love you so damn much. And even if we never grow our family, if it’s just you and me… that’s enough. You’re already my whole world.”
And that’s when I broke.
Tears flowed down my cheeks, the weight I’d carried for so long dissolving under the warmth of his words.
I hadn’t even noticed he was crying, too. He didn’t bother to wipe them away. He simply pulled me into his arms and held me tight.
And in that embrace… I realized something.
He is still my home.