Chapter 5

I hit the cold pavement on my back, and the wind rushed from my lungs. It took me a few moments to remember where I was and how I'd come. The Shades. Naturally, their secret, illegal passage into the human world wasn't a smooth one. If it were as simple as just walking through, as it used to be, then I suppose everyone would be trading favors to access it. I lay there for a moment, as random snowflakes settled on my face. Then, pushing to my feet, I rose.

Pain rocked down my back from my skull to my legs. Curse those Underworld sub-dwellers and their shady deals. Necromancers. I ought to have learned my lesson after my first unsavory encounter with them.

I stumbled along the road. A worn and faded sign read Drearyton Cove two miles this way. The population was too faded to read. How ironic. I strolled the cold, damp streets as flakes of snow fell from a greyed sky. I hated the cold. Every second of it reminded me of my home. The one I’d been sent to live in.

In this world, only a few weeks had passed by since I was last here. Funeral details for the man killed in the Lemon Balm Café fire were still posted on the board outside the church.

A death caused by my handiwork.

I wasn’t sure how I felt about that, but my steps hurried past, then slowed as I reached the ashen remains of the Lemon Balm Café. The debris was only partially stripped away. Windows were boarded, the area roped off. The fire was my handiwork also. Only, this felt different.

I stood outside the ruins of the building, inhaling the putrid, charred debris. My stomach sank deep into me. This was a horrific scene, even to me. But necessary. It had all been necessary... hadn’t it? My head ached. I didn’t know anymore.

A woman passed by me, then slowed her steps and doubled back to stand next to me.

I peered through the fragmented window pane and caught her familiar reflection.

“Such a tragedy, isn't it?” She clucked her teeth.

I swallowed, then nodded. “Yes. It was.” My words didn’t sound sincere, so I added, “It was a tragedy.”

“Breaks my heart, it does. The entire town’s beside itself. The family who owned it are good friends of mine. And with her daughter Lorelei gone, poor Viv is on her own to deal with the fallout.”

I turned my head at the mention of my mother’s name. Just like that, this woman had captured my full attention.

I felt the woman stare at me a little longer, as if trying to remember if she’d seen me before. “You’re not from around here,” she said. “Do you know them? The Alundra family?”

I nodded slowly. “Yes. From... a school music exchange. They are old family friends.” I cleared my throat, attempting to lie better. “And I’m in town to interview... pianists.”

On the inside I rolled my eyes. Why hadn’t I come up with a better alibi? The Shades were careful to make sure the glamour spell hid my identity, but I should have prepared a backstory for my purpose here. I suppose my answer, though forced, wasn’t really a lie. It was littered with fragments of truth. I did want to question her.

Her face brightened. “Yes, yes. The music exchange Homestay program. We’re hosting a girl at our home, too. So, you’re boarding with the Alundras then?"

I frowned, but she didn’t wait for me to answer. “You’re a couple days early, but your timing is perfect. I reminded Vivienne just last night of your visit, so her housekeeper should have a room ready for you by now.” Her head bobbed knowingly. “They can all use as much support as possible. And discussing music will take her mind off things.” She motioned to the blackened, crumbling wall. “This café wasn’t just a diner. It was magical,” she cooed. “People would eat and drink here, then claim the most extraordinary recoveries from their ailments. I’m sure it was just the warm hospitality and amazing pies.” She laughed. “But still, it was a fixture of this town for over a century. Shame that it no longer exists.”

I found myself feeling something I didn't remember feeling before. Guilt. What the hell? How could I feel badly for these people? It was a building. That’s all. Yet, for some reason, to them it was so much more. And of course people were mysteriously cured here—they were being fed magical potions without their knowledge or consent. No wonder humans loved the place.

My annoyance didn’t dull the guilt gnawing at me because the burnt remains of this diner were even more than that. They were a piece of my heritage. A piece I’d single-handedly destroyed.

The errant falling snowflakes had warmed into a light drizzle. Colorless drops of water fell to the ground at my feet; one after another, they came more and more rapidly. Within moments, we were dowsed in a steady stream of frosty rain.

The woman next to me popped open an umbrella and backed away from the wreckage, but I was still frozen in place, unable to turn away. Before I could understand my own mind, I was swept up in a current of remorse and sadness. I didn’t like it.

“Wish there was something I could do to help.” Immediately I clamped my lips shut. That was a thought, meant to be kept within the confines of my mind. Yet I’d spoken it aloud for Mrs. Busybody to hear. Idiot. I mentally pinched myself.

The woman touched my arm, and my body went rigid.

Don’t touch me.

I wasn’t used to being touched. Not by women, unless they were planning to strike me. But this woman didn’t strike me.

“What’s your name, dear?”

I frowned slightly then forced out the word, “Isobel.”

I’m not her. She’s dead. I’ll never be her again.

Her mouth twitched, then she stuck out her hand and clumped onto mine. “I’m Angie Blake. Vivienne is one of my oldest friends. Why don’t I drive you to their house?”

My stomach clenched. That was the very last thing I wanted. I wasn’t ready to face Vivienne. I needed time to prepare. To craft just the right words to convey what I’d come to say. Shaking my head, I swiped the rain from my eyes. It was falling heavier by the second, and the cold wetness seeped in, soaking the thin shirt and pants I was wearing. Against my will I began to shiver.

“No, that’s not needed,” I insisted. “I wouldn’t want to bother her. Or you. Since I’m early.”

“Nonsense. You can’t walk in this weather. I’ll drop you off, and you can give her your wishes in person and get a jump on your assignment. A visit from an old family friend is just what she needs,” she said.

I shook my head, refusing her offer, but she was already steering me toward her car.

“No worries, dear. She’ll be glad you came by. She enjoys entertaining company, and all mothers enjoy meeting friends of their children.

Friends. Lorelei and me? I wanted to laugh at the idea. But just for today, that’s what I’d pretend we were. In real life—well, I doubt either one of us could see that day ever coming.

“So, you mentioned you’ve done exchanges before at Lorelei’s school?” she asked as she veered down the slick streets toward the shore.

I want to curse this nosy woman and her nosy questions. “Yes. But only once.”

We pulled into a gravel lane and stopped, the car engine still rumbling. “You probably know my son Davin. Good looking boy, on the basketball team?”

Again, my heart stilled in my chest. Davin. The pretty little boy-toy I’d—well, what hadn’t I done to him? It was too unpleasant to think of. He was a good guy, and I’d broken him. Repeatedly. Davin was a casualty, not my intended target. Yet still. How could a girl not feel a little badly?

Davin’s mother’s eyes peered into mine, so I forced a brittle smile. “Don’t think I’ve had the pleasure.” The levity I painted over my somber tone sounded as false as it was. This is not going as planned.

She stared a little longer than was necessary, or comfortable, then looked toward the house. “Hmm. Perhaps one day you will.”

For his sake, I hope not.

“Well, we’re here, dear.” She climbed from the car, marched up the steps of Lorelei’s grandmother’s cottage. In the distance, I could hear the crash of waves hitting the shore. How could a thing sound so peaceful and yet so violent? Power lived in the water, and it was potentially as destructive as fire. Lethal but lovely. Words Adrius once used to described me. It made me smile to think of him. Then my smile faded as I thought of the reason he was not by my side.

The door creaked open, and a woman, much thinner and paler than I’d remembered, stepped onto the porch. Her hair was tied in a messy bun on top of her head, her nail polish chipped, and her feet were bare. She tugged the over-sized grey sweater tightly around her slender frame as she looked from me to Mrs. Whatever-her-name-was.

“Hi, Angie.”

Angie. Right.

“Viv, this is Isobel, your Homestay music student. She’s the daughter of some distant family of yours—isn’t that something?” The woman didn’t give Vivienne—my mother— a chance to get a word in, she rambled on. “Found her stranded in the rain at the café site and insisted on bringing her here. She’s early, of course, but I assured her you’d be ready for her.” Her manicured brows lifted. “You are, aren’t you? Remember we spoke about her coming yesterday? Anyway, she wanted to meet you before the program begins.”

Vivienne’s eyes met mine, and something inside me went dark. Void, like a black hole. This was a mistake. I didn’t want to know this woman. I didn’t want to be here.

Then Davin’s overly-talkative, nosy mother gave me a little shove on the back, forcing me to move closer.

Closer to the reason I’d bargained to return here.

Closer to the woman who’d given me life.

Closer to the mother who’d crossed realms to abandon one of her children.