Chapter 31

Noises surrounded me, staggeringly loud, filling my head with the deafening sounds.

They made my ears burn, and I held my head in my hands to keep from vomiting over the violent rush of noise, nothing like I'd ever heard before.

Then in a blinding flash, it stopped, as if sucked backward through time at the speed of light. It hummed in reverse and then faded into a flash of white silence.

I tried to open my eyes, only to realize they'd been open the entire time. I wasn't entirely sure where I was or what had happened, but I was certain something had. And whatever that something had been, it was not good.

With a tentative sniff, I smelled the air. Sterile, as though void of anything living.

Am I dead?

And why was that thought not more troubling to me? Because it wasn’t true. I had died once before, and I would know if I'd met that same fate again. No, I was very much alive still.

Figures and forms in my vision began to take shape as the white haze faded like fog with the rising sun. The first thing I noticed, when I could focus, was a window. The source of the blinding light, because when I focused on it too long it hurt.

I looked away, scanning the other things. A tray-like table in a small room next to a bed. A bed I was in, draped in white sheets and a thin, scratchy blanket that did little to keep me warm. Then I realized none of my senses had been fully working because they were coming back now, with full force. Pain. I felt it everywhere in my body, almost all at once. I cried out, gripping the bed sheets with pale fingers. I had no strength in them, in any of me, but it didn’t stop me from trying to climb out of the bed. I swung one leg over the edge. Then the other. The weight of it pulled me to the floor, and I collapsed in a heap.

When voices and people rushed in, all I saw at first were shoes coming toward me, several of them. Then I felt their hands, some warm, some gentle, one not either. They lifted me back into the bed. And one, the one with the cold, hard hands, covered me with the sheets, flashing a mercurial grin.

"What’s happened to me?" I spoke the words. At least I think I did.

They exchanged looks with one another, then one exclaimed, “She’s finally conscious. I'll send for the doctor.”

Doctor? My gaze drifted back to the window. No longer as bright, I focused on glowing red letters beyond my window.

EMERGENCY.

I was in a hospital. Which meant something was very, very wrong.

****

Fragments of memory returned. The white room. The soldering iron. The stench of burning flesh…my burning flesh. Callum. Luc. The little girl. Abby.

I remembered air hitting my seared skin, the unbearable agony of it.

And now, I was here. Someone had set me free.

I drifted in and out of sleep states. For how long, I’ve no idea.

Inside my mind’s eye, I saw a girl. She was small and frail, beckoning for me to follow her. Thoughts wandered in her eyes. They promised food and rest, and I was hungry and tired. I followed her until she reached the edge of the darkness, where it opened into dazzling light.

But to come out into the light is a dangerous thing. I learned long ago that it is the darkness that keeps us safe. I felt the world I was in…the world I hated…fade away, and welcomed the sweet bliss of sleep, inviting me to enter another world. One of my own making.

Leaning my head back against the pillow of clouds, I sank deeper into its midst. It was my ally, my friend. Darkness and I were intimately acquainted. And even now, after all these years, it never let me down. It always kept me... safe.

But my sanctuary was not to be. All too soon, the darkness was stripped away from me with the tug of a hand.

“OPEN YOUR EYES NOW, VENUS.” The command came from inside my head, but not in my voice. Only someone from my world could do that.

“Wake up. How long do you think we have until they return?”

Cold, angry words on a frosty breath. I knew their source as my eyes scanned the harshness of light. Zanthiel.

“How?” I managed to croak, too weak to say anything more. My throat was still coarse and raw. Suddenly, everything hurt again. This time with amplified intensity, as though someone had gone over my injuries with the tip of a blade.

As the angles of his face came into focus, I blinked, taking in his incredible good looks and perpetual snarl. "Come on," he barked, and then his rough and frozen hands were lifting me from my bed. From my prison. From my darkness.

I woke to another face entirely staring at me. Adrius. His touch flooded me with warmth and light. This... this was better.

That’s when I knew I’d been dreaming.

This time when I opened my eyes, the light jabbed needles into my brain. I squeezed them shut again, focusing on my other senses. The chemical stench of a sterile room. The cold pressing in through the thin blankets covering me. The sound of voices.

Muffled. Then louder. A scuffle. Then silence.

My body tensed. What is going on? I tried again to crack my eyelids open.

I managed to open them halfway before someone drew the curtain shut.

“Thanks.” Whispering my thanks, I attempted to lift my head, but it didn't cooperate, only caused more pain.

“Lie still. You'll be out of here soon enough. But if you move, you might do more damage.”

“And where exactly is here?” I scanned my surroundings.

“Hospital,” he said gravely.

Hospital. The word seemed foreign and confusing to me. Was I dreaming or awake? I narrowed my eyes then drew in a faltering breath. “Adrius? How are you here?” I scanned his face, every square inch, to make certain he was flesh and blood. He was. His green eyes held a tint of gold, and I could see how very different they were from his uncle's. So full of warmth, concern, even now.

“I came for you,” he said. “When Zanthiel told me you were here—"

“He told you that?”

I watched his eyes darken. “Not directly. But I worked it out. I know you, Venus. You found out you were Vivienne and Oberon's daughter. You would want to learn more about that. I came to make sure you didn't lash out in your despair.” He paused, glancing over me. “My fears were... misplaced.”

I turned my head. Pain sparked at the base of my skull. I barked a laugh. “Ironic, I know. The lion has become the lamb.”

“Who did this? Why did they do this?”

I wanted him to know how much it meant, seeing him here. I wanted to answer his questions, but I was dizzy and exhausted, and fireworks of pain exploded throughout my body. So I said nothing, letting my eyes drift shut. It was easier. But I couldn’t hide. There was too much at stake. And so I told the boy I’d loved for a lifetime of his uncle’s heinous betrayal.

“There was an imperfect elegance to what happened to me,” I said slowly. “A mythical scale of karma that I'm sure has never before been matched. I was evil. I got what I deserved.”

Adrius looked weary, nearly as drained as I felt.

“It’s not entirely your fault. That you became evil. Your word by the way, not mine.”

I lifted my gaze to his. “You don't think I'm evil?”

He considered it for a breath. “I think you've suffered a lot, Venus,” he said cautiously. “You were once someone I cared about very deeply. Loved even. And that had nothing to do with your mother's curse. It’s not your fault your transition from Isobel to Venus caused a darkening of your soul. We both know who was to blame for that.” He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair. “But then, it was my arrow that caused your death in the first place. So, it seems, ultimately, I’m the one at fault.”

“Something you've apologized for so many times I may get physically ill if I have to hear it again. So, please, don’t.” I knew the twist of anguish on his face. Knew the guilt and regret that ate away at him to think of that day. It was an accident. An unfortunate one. And had I not been so fickle and selfish to begin with, none of it would have happened at all.

“Water under the bridge. Let it go, Adrius. You’re here, I’m here, and as far as I can tell, still alive and in one piece.”

He surveyed me again, and the strain in his expression to keep his emotions hidden almost made me think otherwise. I swallowed, then met his gaze. “What? What is it? Am I dying?”

“I—I don't know,” he said. “But you need help. They can help you here, but no one in this world will be able to undo what's been done. We need to get you back.”

“So, take me. Take me back with you.”

“You know that I can't. The potion Hawthrin gave me was for one passage only, and even at that he warned I might not live through it. For us both to use it... you wouldn't survive. The veil is sealed, and passing through it requires a great deal of exertion. It took me days to recover enough strength to find you. You've passed the curfew you and Zanthiel arranged.” He arched a brow. “And he will be coming for you. He’ll get you through the veil safely. You just need to stay here and heal until he does.”

He put a hand on my shoulder gently, then fingered the tattered knot of curls resting there. He looked reluctant to leave, which was sweet, though misguided.

“I've ensured the hospital will take extra care and keep a close watch over you. Just stay put.” He gave a firm nod. “Be well. You’ll be home soon, and we will make this right.”

He leaned over me to kiss my forehead. Then his warm hand stroked my cheek. “I have to get back. We both know what will happen if I’m trapped here.”

I smiled thinly. To watch him wither away and die in the human world would be more than my heart could handle. The air wasn’t safe here for Elves, and whatever potion he’d taken to cross over would have lingering effects. “Safe travels,” I whispered, leaning into his touch.

He withdrew his hand too soon.

I studied him as he headed to the door, then called him back.

“Wait. Before you go, tell me one thing, Adrius.” I pulled in a breath and held it, my ill-timed jealousy rearing its familiar head. “Did you come here for me, or for her?”

He'd suffered a horrific journey, one that could have had dire consequences, to get here. To find me. But I needed to know why. Was it that he was concerned for my life? Please, let that be the reason. Or was he concerned I would do something to upset hers?

He met my gaze, and I watched the colors flicker in his eyes.

“I came for you both. Because I care for you both,” he said simply. "And I always will." His eyes clouded, and he lowered his head. “I know Zanthiel will come for you. He’ll spout all manner of nonsense to justify sending you here. But I want you to promise me just one thing.” His eyes searched mine.

My breath caught. I was afraid of what he would ask me to promise and afraid that I wouldn’t say no to him. Even now, after all that has passed between us. After every attempt to exorcise him from my soul, a part of him still lives in my heart. I blinked once and said, “I would promise you anything, Adrius.”

A smile touched his eyes, but he remained stoic. “I want you to look after yourself this time,” he began. “You’ve had a lifetime of living at the mercy of others. It’s time for you to truly heal, Venus.”

His words, gentle as they were, cut me deeply. I’d always looked after myself, and wasn’t that the problem? Why I’d pushed away everyone who mattered to me? But healing, that wasn’t something I’d ever given myself time for. Maybe now…

A nod of agreement. A kiss on the forehead. Then he was gone.

I leaned back and stared at the ceiling.

Hope. It was a dangerous thing to let take root. But once it did, it was a noxious weed, growing rampantly, wanted or not, and spreading so fast it overshadowed things like practicality, reality, sensibility. All else paled in comparison to hope's vibrant hues. That was what he'd left me with. A festering hope, strangling out my common sense.

Common sense says he’s with Lorelei. He loves her and always will. Hope whispers in my ear, But he loves you, too. And he always will. Maybe that love will grow into more.

And while I knew I hadn't deserved it or earned it, I wanted it. It would be real this time. With the binding spell broken, I'd never wonder if his heart truly belonged to Lorelei while he was with me. I would know he was mine.

Hope.

It’s more dangerous than hatred, more lethal than envy, more toxic than vengeance. Hope has the power to decimate your soul.

****

My fingers twitched restlessly. How long was I to lie here waiting for the Shadow Prince? Waiting to be saved was never my thing. Zanthiel was coming, but would he get here soon enough? With only a vague memory of how I’d wound up in this hospital room, I didn’t feel safe here.

The door creaked open, and the man with the cold, calloused hands entered, shutting it behind him. It wasn’t until he closed the blinds and the curtain that I realized he wasn’t here to help.

Reaching for the table next to me, I whipped the pitcher of water at him. It sailed past his head, splattering against the wall behind him.

He shook his head slowly. “Is that the best a witch of your caliber can do?” He grinned, then took slow, measured steps toward me.

I screamed and threw everything else that was on the little table. Which wasn’t much. Finally, I was left with nothing but my powerless hand and the tubes sticking out of them. Being tethered to the bed was proving more than inconvenient. It was going to get me killed.

Are his hunters everywhere?

He placed beefy hands on either side of me, leaning over my bed.

I struggled against the leather straps holding me in place. Useless.

“Now, it seems I'm at an advantage. Perhaps you don’t have magic, since if you did, I'd have witnessed some of your witchiness by now.” He scanned my face at an uncomfortably close distance, his nose nearly brushing mine.

I shuddered. “What happened to sending me home to deliver your message?”

“You will be going, but Greenbalm said nothing about keeping you alive. They can read a witch’s dead body just as easily.” He unstrapped one of my wrists, carefully pinning it in place under the weight of him.

His head leaned down as he reached to free my other arm, exposing the back of his neck.

This is my chance.

I wrenched my arm out from under him then yanked out the needle from my other arm and jammed it into his neck.

He staggered back, tipped over the cart, and fell. With my one free arm, I lunged for the bag, and squeezed, filling him with whatever substance they’d been pumping into me.

He cursed, scrambling to his feet, then he grabbed my shoulders and pinned me to the bed. He shook me twice. Pain ricocheted through me.

“You little...”

His worlds slurred, then his grip loosened. A second later, there was a resounding thud as his heavy body hit the floor.

I fumbled with the straps holding me in place, struggling to get free. With trembling fingers that barley functioned, I unbuckled the last of them and threw myself out of the bed. My legs buckled and I crashed onto the floor, next to the man. Holding my breath, I lay there, a mere inch from his bloated face. His mouth hung open, spilling drool. I scuttled backwards away from him, terrified he might wake.

I have to get out of here. Forcing myself onto wobbly legs, I stumbled to the door and escaped into the hall. The floor tilted. Everything was blurry and distorted. I couldn’t see much further ahead than my hand, but I leaned my hand against the wall and tried to run as far and as fast as I could. Every few steps I crumpled and fell, and I pulled myself up to keep going. Something glowed red in the distance.

EXIT.

There was an exit sign up ahead.

Come on, you can make it.

Floundering toward it, I silently prayed not to encounter anyone along the way. I pushed open the door and smacked into a cold wall with arms of steel.