Chapter 90

Ashlynn POV

I sat in my kitchen the next morning, sipping my coffee and looking through a veterinarian catalog. I needed to order some new equipment before the upcoming breeding season and had to get my purchase order in to Luna Jenna so it could be reviewed. It was just after six when I heard a soft knock on the door. I stood and padded to the door in my stocking feet. I had taken the day off, so I wore a nicer pair of jeans that I would wear when working with the animals and had on a button down shirt. My boots sat by the door since we preferred not to trek mud and horse crap through our apartment.

When I opened the door, Shawna stood there with Natalie. Both were wearing leggings and hiking boots with long sleeve henleys. "Planning on hiking today?" I asked as I swung the door wide so they could enter. The two exchanged looks and then bent to remove their boots. "You can keep them on if they don't have mud or crap on them," I said as I turned towards the kitchen.

"It's okay, we will take them off," Natalie offered. They quickly removed their boots and followed me into the kitchen. "And yes we did think we might go hiking," she offered.

I motioned for them to take a seat at the counter bar and poured them each a cup of coffee. I offered creamer and sugar, placing them on the counter in front of them. I waited while they doctored their coffee up and then I sat down opposite them. "So tell me what is on your mind Shawna?" I got right to the point. When she hesitated, I started over. "I apologize, let's not jump right in to all of that. Tell me how you have been and how things are at the new pack?"

Shawna smiled shyly. "Things are pretty good. I mean there are some mean girls, just like anywhere, but otherwise I'm doing great. Natalie has been teaching me to fight."

"No kidding," I said in awe. "Tell me about that."

"Well she's a warrior. That's why she's been assigned to be my body guard, although I don't think I really need one. I want to be able to defend myself so nothing like what happened will ever happen again."

I nodded, "I think that's great."

"She's not being totally forthcoming here," Natalie said. "She's actually doing amazing. When we get back she wants to try out for the patrol, become a real warrior on one of the squads."

"Oh wow, you must be really good then. So Natalie is a good teacher I take it?"

"She is," Shawna nods. "But I haven't told Michael." She looks at me and then adds "Yet."

"He will be surprised," I said. "Why did you say there are mean girls? In what way?"

"Well they say things behind my back but sometimes in a way that I can hear them. They call me broken and make snide comments to Michael about me, asking how he can be with someone like me." She has a sadness in her voice that makes my heart hurt for her.

"Thats awful," I say. "No one here would ever talk about you like that."

"You don't know that for sure," Natalie says. "Women are catty and these are mostly women who have a thing for Michael. Prior to Shawna though, he didn't really have an interest in taking a mate. It's why I'm convinced that she's his fated mate, otherwise why would he be so adamant about being with her when he had no interest in a mate before?"

"You have a point," I say. "Except I think Shawna is a sweet woman and she showed so much courage and strength. Michael seems like the type that could be drawn to a woman who is both courageous and strong. Truthfully, Shawna could have shut down and fell apart. I was here, I saw her and how she stood up in front of the council and told them what those horrible men did to her. That takes a lot of courage. Alot."

Natalie stared at me and then looked at Shawna. "I guess I never thought about that. I wish I could have seen that side of you."

Shawna lets out a strangled laugh. "No you don't. I was a mess."

Shawna sits up taller, "Anyway, I have something I need to do and I was hoping that you could help me Ashlynn."

I look at her and nod, "Okay, what is it?"

Shawna swallows hard and I see her tense up, so I know whatever it is, it may not be something I want to do. I don't say anthing, I just wait for her to speak. Natalie rubs her back reassuringly so I'm left to believe that she knows what Shawna is going to ask me to help her with.

"I want to go back there. I want to face my demons. It's the only way I can move forward at this point. I want a life with Michael but I feel like I really need to free my soul from the fear that is in my heart. It's so oppressive."

"I'm not following," I say. "Go back where?"

"To that tunnel. To the dungeon they held me in. I need to see it with a clear mind, not one clouded with fear and hunger. I need to walk in there and face it and know that I walked out and I'm still standing."

"Oh wow," I blow out the breath I was holding. "Okay. Ummm, I'm not sure if we can do that Shawna. I think they blew the opening closed after everyone was freed. I need to check with Cody and Uncle Gabe."

"They may have blown it closed on this end, but I don't think they would have on the main entrance from the Godsend Pack," Shawna offers. I know she's correct about that but it's literally walking right into her worst nightmare. I stare at her warily but she looks determined.

"Okay. Does Alpha James know you want to do this?" I ask.

"No. But if you need to tell him for it to happen, I think I'm okay with it. It's just that I don't want Michael inside that tunnel with me. I would prefer no men go inside with me. I don't want to be triggered by male voices, or scents. I was hoping you and Nat would go with me. Help me to face it and walk me through the whole thing and then walk out with me. I want to literally close the door on it. For good."

My mind it going in circles, trying to figure out how to approach this. I want to help Shawna, I really do. This is a big ask though and going onto the Godsend Pack land may not be possible. I know it's vacant but I feel like it's walking into something haunted almost. "When do you want to do this?" I ask.

"I was hoping to be done with it before the Full Moon, so I can go on the run and feel free of it."

I'm sure my eyes show my shock. "That's in three days. You want to have this done within the next two?" She nods.

"Wow. Okay let me talk to Uncle Gabe. You know we will have to go with warriors, he won't let us enter there without protection."

"It's okay. As long as I can go inside and get this out of my system."

"Right, well I suppose you two should go on your hike and I will go talk to my Uncle." I walk them to the door and Shawna throws her arms around me unexpectedly. I hug her tight before we release each other. "Let's talk again this afternoon, okay?" She nods, throws her boots on and I watch as Natalie and Shawna wander off towards one of the trails in the woods. I hope she understands what she's asking and I hope she's ready for this.