Chapter 6 PAYING ATTENTION
I do not know what possessed me.
One moment I was sitting there being charming and strategic and completely in control of the situation and the next moment my brain simply stepped out of the room, my heart took over and I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his, clumsily smacking where his lips joined.
It was brief and light.
Then I pulled back and looked at my pasta like nothing had happened.
Jake blinked. Then he smiled and turned back like nothing had happened, like it was normal and like girls kissed his cheek at lunch all the time which they probably did because he was Jake Sinclair.
I stared at my pasta. My face was the temperature of the sun for I was blushing heavily.
From across the table Alexander had gone very still. I could feel it without looking.
His stillness that was not relaxed but he was working very hard to appear composed.
I reached over and handed Jake another napkin he did not need.
"Thanks, Miss Lily." Jake said automatically.
Alexander picked up his blood bag, drank from it, set it down and picked it up again.
I watched him from my peripheral vision doing this three times in a row like he had forgotten what he was supposed to be doing with it.
"Are you okay?" I asked him.
"Fine," he said.
"You keep picking that up and putting it down."
"I am aware of what I'm doing," he said, trying to not snap at me.
Jake looked between us. "You two are weird together."
"We are not together," Alexander and I said at the exact same moment.
Jake held up both hands. "Okay."
After lunch, Jake had class in the opposite direction.
He waved at both of us and walked off and I watched him go with my lunchbox under my arm and the feel of that quick kiss still warm on my lips.
Alexander appeared beside me.
"That was not part of the plan." He said quietly.
"It was spontaneous," I said.
"It was reckless," he said.
"He didn’t mind."
"He did not notice," Alexander said. "Which is actually worse."
I looked at him, pained. "What does that mean?"
He looked straight ahead. "It means Jake Sinclair has girls kissing his cheek so often that one more does not register." He glanced at me. "You need to be more memorable than a cheek kiss, Lily."
I frowned, slightly glad that his reasoning was not so harsh. "So it strategically did not work."
"Completely," he said.
"And that is your only problem with it?"
"Obviously," he said.
I looked at him. He looked forward, not minding me.
His jaw was doing something tight and complicated that he was clearly hoping I would not notice.
I noticed but I said nothing. We walked to class in silence. But I was smiling at the floor the whole way there.
And I wasn't entirely sure it was because of Jake.
By Thursday, our lunch had become a ritual. And people were shocked that the guys even let me in. Many were even jealous as they believed I had joined the guys' league.
The lunch consisted of my pasta, their blood bags, Jake's stories and Alexander's I-don't-care silences. The napkin dispenser was always permanently on my side of the table where I could reach it fastest.
It was funny how quickly strange things became normal.
Today Jake was telling us about swim practice.
I had learned that Jake talked with his whole body. His hands moved when he spoke. His shoulders got involved, too.
When he described diving into the pool he half stood from his seat and demonstrated the arm position and the girl at the next table literally stopped eating to watch him.
I could not blame her. Everything about him was beautiful and regal.
"The timing has to be exactly right," he was saying. "If you go in even half a second early the whole thing falls apart."
"Wow. That sounds so incredibly precise," I said even though I didn't really understand what he meant.
He pointed at me. "Exactly. Most people don't get that."
"Most people have not been paying attention," I said.
He looked at me, surprised.
I had been paying attention for two years from a distance but that felt like too much information for a Thursday lunch.
"You actually listen?" he said like it surprised him.
"Of course I listen," I said, teeth glowing at him.
He smiled.
Then he reached across the table and picked up my hand and pressed his lips against my knuckles.
So gentle and easy. It was the most naturally beautiful thing I had ever seen in the world.
"You are genuinely one of a kind, Miss Lily Danvers," he said.
My brain left my body completely.
I was sure that I made a sound. Maybe a small and undignified moan that I would think about at three in the morning for the rest of my life.
"Thank you," I managed to whisper, going mushy with.... love.
He winked and went back to his story.
I sat very still with my hand in my lap like it was now a sacred object that should not be moved carelessly.
From across the table Alexander looked away. It was not done gradually or casually. He turned his head sharply to the side and fixed his gaze on something across the cafeteria with the focused intensity of someone who had decided that whatever was happening on that side of the room was the most interesting thing he had ever seen in his life.
There was nothing interesting on that side of the room.
It was a wall. He was staring at a wall.
I leaned slightly toward him.
"You are jealous," I whispered.
"I am not. Stay away from me." he said to the wall.
"You are literally staring at a wall Alexander."
"I find it interesting."
"It is a wall."
"It is a very textured wall," he said.
I pressed my lips together hard so I wouldn't laugh out loud.
"Mind your business," he said quietly. Still not looking at me.
"This is my business," I whispered back. "You are the one making faces."
"I am not making faces."
"You made at least three faces."
He finally turned to look at me.
His grey eyes were doing something scary that he had clearly not given them permission to do.
"Eat your pasta Lily," he said.
"It is cold," I said.
"Then eat it cold."
Jake looked between us. "What are you two whispering about?"
"Nothing," Alexander said fast.
"Alexander finds the wall interesting," I said.
Jake turned to look at the wall. "That is just a wall."
"That is what I said," I told him.
Jake shrugged with a small laugh and went back to his story.
Alexander looked at me with an expression that said this conversation was over. I looked back with an expression that said absolutely nothing was over.
I was so glad that I had a chance to taunt Alexander Hollander and I was loving every second of it.
Jake was still talking about swim practice when he mentioned his personal best time.
"Forty seven seconds," he said. "I know it doesn't sound impressive but for that distance...."
"It is so impressive," I said immediately.
He raised an eyebrow. "You know swim times?"
"I looked it up for you," I said.
He stared at me.
"After you mentioned practice last week," I added. "I wanted to understand what you were talking about."
He was quiet for a moment.
Then he gave me that smile again. The one that made the girls at the next table forget her lunch.
"Nobody has ever done that for me before," he said.
"Done what?”