Chapter 15: My plastic surgeries only makes me pretiest

Maybe that's why I was sure that Adriana and Psyche would understand each other better, since they both had more experience with girls. The smell of the rain, the leaves that fell from the trees and caressed the wind with a fresh murmur, and the slanting rain wetting the asphalt, seemed to envelop me in a state of calm and serenity.

I look at my body in front of the mirror and I can see a slim and slender girl who is 1.64 meters tall. My hair falls in soft waves to my waist. The shade I'm currently wearing is champagne blonde and the roots are brown, but its natural color is an intense black. My face is oval and the first thing that stands out are my huge eyes, always expressing more than I would like. My eyes are jet black. My mom says I inherited them from my maternal grandmother. And my camel lashes never require much mascara, plus a good seven hours of sleep to look curvy and elongated. I have a cosmetic nose job that keeps my face in harmony, I had it done last summer taking advantage of the fact that I had to treat a deviated septum. It's not that I wanted Aphrodite's nose or had any particular trauma, the truth is that I liked my nose, until I was seven years old, when my mother told me that she regretted that I had removed her nose. Maybe something cruel for a little seven-year-old creature who had the memory of an elephant, to start filling his head with insecurities, or maybe it was me being demanding and a perfectionist. Twelve years later, the surgeon helped me have a nose less like my mother's, and more like the ones that appear in Versace glasses advertising campaigns.In addition to the scalpel, I went through two years with orthodontic treatments that left my teeth big and white, perfectly aligned. From a very young age I would get used to living in front of the mirror with the qualifying daffodil. Luckily there was something intact in me, the value of inner beauty, my grandmother taught me that beyond appearances, inner beauty would always be the most important thing to take care of in me. When I was little, Mom used to read me fables and stories and we always talked about the positive message that each story left. We have to believe in people, and also in our dreams. Mom said that we all came to this planet to be angels on earth.

I scan my face with both eyes and examine myself carefully. I have defined cheekbones and a small but pompous mouth. Lower lip much thicker than the upper one, matching my small chin.  Yes, round and small chin and lips, like one of those little Chinese dolls that you can't find a perfect candidate that fits their lips that are barely accessible to other mouths.My whole body looks balanced, delicate and light, my firm and long legs and my toned body, thanks to four hours a day in the University gym, make me fit perfectly within the lines of delicacy and grace. I'm not a 1.80 Kate Moss, but my hips are thick, my legs are thin, and my posture is fragile and thin.  In general, nature was very kind to me and I feel grateful.

I study Social Communication, I want to be a journalist, I believe that the only way to contribute something to the world and touch the souls that feel in darkness is from compassion. I am compassionate by nature, because from a very young age, when I lost my father and my maternal grandmother, mother, I knew what pain was. I like to be compassionate with others, and invite them to new worlds with my stories. If a person who reads me smiles or feels good, I feel that my life makes more sense. Writers are oracles of wisdom. Anyway, writing and positively influencing people and being a entertainment reporter are among my future life goals. Writing is the way I connect my world with reality.Emotionally, I am characterized by being tender and affectionate. I also have great intuition that allows me to know when a loved one is sad or worried. Despite being a spiritual and sensitive girl, when things get difficult for a family member or friend, I never abandon them, and then I become like a gigantic rock where they can lean on, until the tide goes out. Of course, he also made mistakes, atrocities, atrocities, which were not worth it in the slightest and I have been fortunate to have my family there for me.

In the love sphere, before Meiby I felt practically the same as being with Meiby. I have many suitors who never quite believe that I am a lesbian or often think that I am one of those bisexuals who only confess it because they want to have a threesome. “Oh, Gosh.” I let out cigarette smoke as I rolled my eyes and remembered the panorama of my totally banal love life. The men I have met express a resoundingly rigid stance regarding the indispensability of the penis.  Anyway, being a lesbian is not well accepted in my family either, I was my biological mother's worst nightmare, flesh and bones: a lesbian daughter and also with shades of a writer.In the lesbian world, the active ones, better known as the women who like to penetrate more during the sexual act, used to look at me as if I were a piece of meat, or an appetizing appetizer. Generally masculine women liked to be active, or that was what I had learned, because the truth is that today I am quite inexperienced in sex. I try to study about duality, ying and yang to better understand my inner world.