Chapter 13: Sun. blonde. Moon. Brunnete.

"And how do you know that I’m passive?"

"Because it’s obvious that you are, I know."

"Uh-huh, but you liked Psyche, then," I pointed out cleverly. "Is she also passive?"

"Yes, I know she is, she looks passive."

"Um, I don't think so. Do you?"

"Yes, I know she is passive and I’m going to prove it when I go to see her, in San Juan de los Morros.— Suddenly I felt a wave of jealousy all over my body, I could also go to San Juan to that Reggae festival... probably to make a fool of myself... She He would surely be with his friends, he would greet me if he recognized me. Or maybe she was just too drunk that night and wouldn't even remember that she had danced with me, and would ignore me for the rest of the night while I felt embarrassed for having made the love movie in my head.

Well thanks Adriana, I have to hang up.

What will you do tomorrow?

Bye bye.

I sighed, stunned by the dashed expectations of meeting Psyche. How could I be so stupid to feel special for a woman who flirted with me at a nightclub? Probably that night Psyche went with someone else, since she didn't go with Adriana or me... someone else would have been lucky enough to take her to bed. How deluded I had been to think that there was any connection between that mysterious girl and me. It was clear that the only thing Psyche wanted was sex from the way we had danced, the way she touched me... How could I believe it was anything more than that? and if Adriana was going to see her for that reggae festival they would surely have a lot of wild sex.But I still liked her, I couldn't get her out of my mind, now that I knew her name and had advanced in my search I had a better chance of seeing her again. A lustful part of me thought that a good fuck never hurt, so if that was the only thing that Psyche was interested in me, I would look for her and have the best fuck of my life. Although something inside me told me that I wouldn't settle for that... my sensitive, spiritual side. After all, as Adriana pointed out, I was a Cancer rising Virgo moon in Taurus. And like any sensitive little crab, and like a good rational and mental Virgo, I knew that if I liked Rocío as much as I suspected, I would get excited about her and suffer from not being able to have her and not letting her know or showing her that I wanted something more with her.

I took the notebook and opened Facebook. I put all my hopes in him having a Facebook account and not being one of those lonely moles of society who don't use social media. I looked everywhere for Psique from San Juan de los Morros, a medical student. I searched for it by entering San Juan de los Morros, a city in the Guárico state in Venezuela, as the address. Among all the results that came out, none of them were her. I decided to start with the gay world of Mérida. I looked in the friends of the official account of the Jackos nightclub, there was no Psyche. Demons! I started searching among my friends.The gay world is usually divided into groups, I opened up to each member of a different group of friends, I opened up to all my gay and lesbian friends, and to those gay and lesbian couples who move away from the world and become nomads of the LGBTQ society. Every Psyche that appeared on my Facebook friends list I opened in a new tab to examine their profile photos. When she saw a photo in which she was completely sure that it was not Psyche, she immediately discarded it. Some photos did not look clear or some Psyches had profile photos on their Facebook accounts of artists or images of abstract art, their soccer team. To those profiles whose faces I couldn't distinguish in the profile photo, I sent the request at once, it was better to be safe than sorry. Any of them could be the Psyche I was looking for, my Psyche. I was already giving up, I couldn't see any Rocío with certainty that could be her, I couldn't find her.I opened a couple of old lesbian friends, Luisana and Génesis, who had been girlfriends for many years, a lovely couple of lesbians from the city of Mérida. I searched through the Facebook friends of both of them, and there she was: Psique Smith from San Juan de los Morros. UNERG Medicine ULA Music Mérida. I opened the photo to see it a little better; I could recognize her gaze. She was smiling next to a girl wearing glasses in the photograph.

She looked really pretty; it was a photo of just her face, and it was enough for me to recognize her even in thumbnail size. She had a series of freckles on her nose, and her gaze looked intense and sparkled just like that night when her eyes glimmered in front of me. She had chestnut, wavy hair down to her shoulders; it was her. My heart raced, perhaps I sensed for unknown reasons that my life would change when I pressed the "send friend request" button. So I did it with a small, stifled scream of excitement. I updated my Facebook profile and put up a profile picture I had taken with Everth that night. If she saw me in the same gray dress I wore that night, she would recognize me. I relived her intense brown eyes on me as she offered me one of those Elephant cigarettes with the green tip; I bit my lips. I looked at the photos of Psique that weren’t blocked on her Facebook profile. I tried to find any girlfriend or possible competitor; I couldn't see anything compromising, just a couple of photos of her with some friends. In each photo, she was with a different girl. A few photographs of Psique alone in front of a mirror. Nothing revealing, besides her natural beauty, her Facebook profile was a block of ice. I couldn’t gather anything about her love life. I lay on the bed while I reviewed on my phone the few photos I had been able to save from her Facebook account, and now I was looking at them in my phone gallery; she was really beautiful. I liked her so much that I felt really silly. That night, I slept hugging my gray dress, the one I wore when we danced, and with my headphones on, listening on repeat to "Rubia Sol Morena Luna," the first song I danced to with her.