Chapter 38

"I... fucking love you, Azrielle" my knees trembled, I was so shock, did I heard it right? Or my heart is playing tricks on me?

"What?" He scoffed and smirked. I didn't heard it clearly, nagkakagulo kasi ang sistema ko at hindi mapalagay dahil sa halik nya. Its driving me nuts!

"You're so dense. Good night, Azrielle" did he just insult me?

"O-oy teka lang" Umiling sya habang umaakyat sa hagdan.

Ano nga yung sinabi nya? I blame the deafening sound of my heartbeat, I'm not dense! Hmp!

He really loves to piss me off! Kainis! Hindi ko lang naman narinig, I just want him to repeat it, kupal talaga.

Napatingin ako sa baba ng hagdan nang makaakyat ako, the memory of us kissing flooded my mind. Hays, bakit ba ang rupok ko sa halik nya! This is not right, even if it feels so right!

We should talk about this, ilang beses na itong naulit. Even if my body wants to, even if my heart wants to! This is not right!

Kakausapin ko siya bukas to settle everything. B-but he might get mad at me, ano ba itong napasok ko?

"Hoy Coltrane, usap tayo" sabi ko, nasa school na kami at hindi nya ako iniimik.

Humalukipkip sya at nag igting ang panga bago sya ngumisi.

"The room next to the council office, 3pm."

"Ha? Paghihintayin mo pa ako?" Pagmamaldita ko. Umiling sya.

"The truth is waiting for you" he winked before he left. Ano daw? The truth? Truth about what?

Kanina pa ako tingin ng tingin sa relo ko, hinihintay ko kasing mag alas tres. Tinext ko pa si Coltrane kung andun na ba sya, ayoko namang ako yung maghihintay no!

From: Coltrane Montreal

I'm already here. Hurry up.

I rolled my eyes and started walking. Nainis pa ako dahil wala naman siya dito.

To: Coltrane Montreal

Wala ka naman. Filipino time ba? Don't ditch me!

Hindi sya nag reply, lumapit ako sa may hagdanan at para silipin baka nasa storage area sya, storage na kasi sa ground floor nito.

Pero iba nakita ko, si Eros at si Angeline. Angeline's arms are wrapped around his waist, he cupped her face and kiss her on the lips.

"Monthsary na naman natin sa ten, where are we going? Ay no, paano ka na naman magpapaalam sa pretend girlfriend mo?"

Ten. Our fucking monthsary. What the fuck?

"I'll handle her love, makikipag break na rin ako." He answered, nanikip ang dibdib ko sa galit. Para akong bombang sasabog. He cheated on me, at hindi lang yun, she's fully aware of it at sabay pa kami ng monthsary!?

I know that Coltrane and I kissed and its counted as cheating pero ito? Sila pala? Same monthsary pa!

"Two months from now its our third year anniversary" napalunok ako sa narinig, three years na sila? So bakit pa ako niligawan ni Eros? What the fuck?

"Eros!" I called. Shock was written on his face.

"I never thought you'd do this to me. Magsama kayo!"

"W-wait, Azrielle" rinig ko ang yabag nya, nagpupunas ako ng luha at humakbang ng mabilis, naramdaman kong may yumakap sa akin at sa dibdib nya ako humagulgol.

"Step back, matagal na kitang pinagbigyan. Stay away or I'll fucking break you into parts, Eros"

"Let me talk to her" Umiling ako sa yakap ni Coltrane, I don't want to hear any explanations from him, sapat na ang narinig ko.

"Fuck off, now!" Nanginig ako sa bulyaw ni Coltrane, he squeezed me into a tight hug bago nya ako hinila palayo.

Tahimik lang akong humihikbi sa gilid habang pinapanuod ang papalubog na araw. I feel so betrayed but I know that I betrayed him too at some point. I'm hurt and I'm also guilty.

Nilingon ko si Coltrane na nasa kabilang gilid, he shyly smiled at me.

"Kelan mo pa alam?" I asked, medyo inis rin ako sa kanya kasi hindi nya sinabi sa akin.

"Before I left for spain they broke up, and I don't really care about their relationship because its not my business to meddle with" most of the times wala talagang pake ang mga lalaki sa mga nangyayari sa paligid nila.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi sa akin?"

"Because I thought they are not a thing anymore." He picked a pebble and played with it. "I found out last month, remember the day you cooked for him? She cooked for him too." Kaya pala hindi sya nagdalawang isip na itapon yung niluto ko para sa kanya.

"I was hesistant to tell you, ako lang naman 'to, yung kupal mong kaibigan. Siya, he's your ideal man. Siya yung lagi mong pinipili, Azrielle, hindi ako"

"I'm sorry for making you feel like that" tumayo sya at umupo sa tabi ko. "Don't be sorry, matagal ko nang tanggap iyon."  He smiled plainly, sumandal ako sa braso nya at humingang malalim.

"Ayokong mangealam but I don't want you to get hurt, you don't deserve that kind of relationship. Kaya ipinakita ko na lang, I'm sorry for hurting you"

"No, thank you for showing me." Natahimik kami at pinanuod ang papalubog na araw.

I heard him sigh and cleared his throat. He cursed and held my hand.

"I also want you to know my truth, please hear me out and process everything. I love you but fuck, you're so slow"

"Why are you insulting me?" Kunot noo kong tanong.

"I'm not insulting you, I'm telling the truth" he rolled his eyes and pouted. Umayos ako ng upo at hinarap sya, I calmed my self and signaled him to tell me everything.

He closed his eyes and bit his lip.

"I love you. I mean it, I fell inlove with you since our childhood days, I love you even if you can't see and appreciate all my efforts, I love you even if you don't like me at all."

"What?" He chuckled. Dahan dahan lang! Hindi ko pa napro-proseso!

"Te amo, I love you, Putangina mahal kita" his eyes conveyed me a message, showed me his emotions. It was intense, nalunod ako sa titig nyang iyon.

"Minumura mo ako?" He closed his eyes and massaged his temples.

He claimed my lips and kissed me deeply, he kissed me like he really love me.

"I love you, baby." He whispered in between our kisses. He stopped kissing me and looked at me in my eyes.

"Pwede bang ako nalang? Sa akin ka nalang mahulog, ako nalang mahalin mo? For once choose me. Love me instead, Azrielle."

He loves me. Oh my gosh, mahal nya ako! Tama ba 'tong narinig ko? Baka kinukupal nya lang ako?

"Ano ulit? Pakiulit? I just have to confirm it"

"Mahal na mahal kita, Azrielle. If words are not enough then let me prove my love for you, let me show that Its worth it if you choose me"

"B-but...

"No buts" he sterned "I'm fully aware that this is not the right time to confess my love for you but I've waited long enough for this day, yung malaya akong sabihin sa'yo lahat ng nararamdaman ko. And if you still love him then fuck that, let me erase every memory of him in your heart. This time let your heart see me and feel my love for you, just give me a chance this time."