Chapter 44

*IRIS*

The lights burned my eyes, bright and surprising as I tried to open my eyes. I closed them multiple times trying to adjust to the lights. I couldn't hear anything but machines running around me. The sound of air blasting somewhere and beeping, so much beeping. My head felt like it was going to explode. I heard mumbling, angry mumbling, in weirdly hushed voices. I tried to speak but felt like something was choking me. I tried to move my arms, but someone was holding them down. Tears started to sting my already burning eyes. I started to breathe harder, and the beeping got louder. I felt a hand on mine, and I slightly turned my head. “Iris, calm down. Please, baby, you have to calm down.” Ryker was talking to me softly, bending over now to look into my eyes. He wiped a tear away from my eyes. I blinked twice, like I had seen on television medical shows, to let him know I couldn't calm down. I needed to know what was going on. I needed to be able to speak.

“Iris, you were shot. Your body needs to heal.” His eyes looked misty, like he was going to cry, which somehow seemed out of place on his face. “I know you must be scared. I won't let anything happen to you. I won't leave your side.” He sounded almost desperate, which frightened me more. I forced sound out from the tube I now assumed was in my throat. “She needs to sleep, Lorcane. I am sorry, but I have to sedate her.” The words burned into my brain. I didn't want to be sedated. I didn't want to be under someone else’s control. I forced my head to shake in a back-and-forth motion in order to say no. I saw a woman come in with a small bun wrapped tight around her head. She had a syringe, coming towards the line running into my arm. Ryker knew I didn't want her to do it, so he stepped in front of her. “No, she doesn't want to be sedated. She shook her head no.” His voice was deep, threatening. I heard another voice, Deacon, but I couldn't see him. “Ryker, let the woman do her job.” He also sounded deep toned and angry. Were they at odds? What is happening? I felt the warmth in my body when the medication entered my veins. I struggled to keep my eyes open, struggled to stay conscience. I lost.

*RYKER*

Her eyes shut just as quickly as they had opened. I sat there, for three days, waiting for her eyes to open. I slammed the breakfast tray into the wall. “Lorcane!” Ayden came charging into the room. “She didn't want to go to fucking sleep!” I looked at the doctor who had kept this woman alive. “If you cannot calm yourself, I will have you removed. I respect you. You are my friend, but you are not disrespecting my staff, or my building. Control yourself or leave.” I didn't say anything back to him. He wasn't wrong. I was acting like a crazy person. I nodded at him and sat back down in the chair beside her bed. She died three times in surgery. He said it was very touch and go for a while. She had to have three blood transfusions. Her chest is bruised, and she has broken ribs from CPR. Her face is more purple than ivory. He came into that waiting room and told me she was breathing but barely. He said he didn't know if she would wake up. The bullet had taken out part of her liver, kidney, and spleen. I was aware of the miracle Ayden had performed and I appreciated it. I couldn't explain the pain I was in. I had been with many women. I haven't felt this pain before. This fear. This worry. I couldn't lose her, not like this. I will let her go, I will send her back to school, but I want to know if she is happy and healthy first.

Deacon tried to force me to eat multiple times before I finally sent him to check on things in the city. It wasn't that I didn't appreciate his worry, but I was tired of being stared out like some sort of rare bird. A baby one who needed to be hand fed and coddled. I laid my head down on the piece of mattress just beside where Iris was laying. I was exhausted, drained, emotionally and physically. I closed my eyes just for a moment.

*IRIS*

Bright lights, again. Burning fire in my throat. I reached up absentmindedly scratching an itch on my nose, and my hands moved this time. There was something amazing about getting the ability to move your arms when you wake up several times unable to do so. I looked over to the chair beside me to see it empty. I knew Ryker had been there every day and night that I was lying there. The doctor had decided I was ready to have the tubes out. He woke me up and took them out, he then unstrapped me from the bed. He told me about the damage that Ivy had done to me when she shot me. I laid there still slightly confused when a nurse walked in. “Where are my visitors?” I asked smiling, trying to be nice. She looked at me with an almost pitiful look. After a few moments, I asked again. She left the room and came back with a folded-up piece of paper. I sat up the best I could in the bed. I opened the paper and immediately recognized the handwriting; it was from Ryker.

Iris,

I know this is a horrible way of doing this. When Ayden, your doctor, woke me up to tell me they would be removing all your tubes I decided I would go before you woke up. I knew it would be easier that way. I had him write a letter, so when you are back on your feet, you can go back to school. You can go to any school in the country. I would make sure it happens, if you chose to leave the state. I wouldn't blame you. I have put you in enough danger. I will no longer be doing that. I will be letting you go. I will have Deacon, and other security men watching you, keeping you safe. It will not be me. You will not see me again. You will go back to school. You will move on with your life. I will not contact you. I am sorry I put you in this position. Take care, beautiful Iris.

Ryker Lorcane.

I read the letter through multiple times with tears streaming down my cheeks. I called the nurse, asking her for my things. I wanted my phone. She did as I asked. I tried to call his number. I waited for it to ring. He changed it. It had been disconnected. I searched for Deacon’s number next. It wasn't on my phone. They deleted his number from my phone. My sadness turned to anger. How could he do this? Just leave me here, in a hospital? How could he abandon me? I threw my phone at the wall. “I want to leave.” I told the nurse who still looked at me like she felt sorry for me. “I will ask the doctor to come and talk to you.” She said smiling sweetly at me. I tried to sit up on the edge of the bed, but it was painful... “Iris, please lay back.” The doctor, Ayden, came running into my room. “You aren't quite ready to run a marathon yet” He helped me back up in the bed. “You are going to need some intensive physical therapy. I will send Matt in this evening to talk to you about it.” He smiled at me, ordered me some pain meds with the nurse, and left the room. As the nurse gave me some pain meds, I fought back the urge to just take off. I wanted to go talk to him. I wanted to tell him that I can't go back to school, not like this. He deleted his number like I don't know where he lives. I laid back, feeling the pain meds kick in, when a voice entered the room. It wasn't a new voice. It was familiar. I felt the hair rise on the back of my neck. “Hello Iris.” The voice said softly. I opened my eyes. “Hello, Theo.”