Chapter 23
Draven stalked forward carefully, with the grace of a predator knowing it has its prey trapped. Alarm shot through her, along with a sudden deep awareness of every inch of her body.
She shook her head vigorously, sending her chestnut curls flying.
“I haven't pictured anything about your bed, I've hardly met it.”
An amused light flashed behind his eyes and he took another step forward. She found herself retreating. Each step he took, she took one in reverse, desperately trying to maintain the space between them, until at last she ran out of room, her legs bumping up against the bed in question. She couldn't help the twinge of panic that set in then. She was trapped. Draven didn't stop his approach until he was inches from her, his big body invading her space, but not touching.
“Hmm,” he said in response, his gaze flicking to the bed. “I think you are very curious, little mouse. About me, and my bed.”
He leaned in and she was forced to choose between sitting on the bed or allowing him to touch her. She managed a compromise between the two which left her leaning backward, one inch away from losing her balance. Her heart had sped up to a ridiculous speed, pounding in her ears loud enough she worried the entire compound would hear it.
She wasn't ready for this.
She could feel the pull of her body. She was attracted to him, very attracted to him. God, who wouldn't be? The man was the stuff of fantasies, and she could tell by the focus and determination in his eyes that the sex would be incredible. But sex here meant commitment, one she would never be allowed out of. If there was any chance of returning home at all, she had to avoid such a thing.
He leaned farther and she plunked down on the edge of the bed, her arms coming up before her, her hands on his chest. Warmth spread through her fingers, and for a second her brain stilted to a halt, she sat there, her hands on his chest, not allowing him closer, but not pushing him away either.
His face was bent toward her, his blue eyes intense and focused.
Her breathing was shallow now, and she knew he was going to kiss her.
A sly grin lifted the corner of his lips as he leaned forward farther, testing her resistance.
Her fingers faltered. Damn it, she was supposed to push him away. Where was her outrage? Or her resistance, at least? Instead she found herself watching that mouth, wondering at its taste.
One little kiss couldn't really hurt right? A kiss wasn't a commitment, it was just a kiss.
She licked her lips and waited, her fingers curling in the fabric of his shirt like they had a mind of their own.
“Is your decision made Mia?”
No, she wasn't ready to choose a mate. She didn't want a mate at all, she reminded herself.
He tilted his head, heat and hunger hardening the lines of his face, he leaned forward...and then stepped back, the armor she had laid on the bed fisted in his hands.
“I make my point. See how easy it is to cloud your judgment? Lust, like fear, is a powerful influence, it drives us to behaviors that we would avoid, if we were in our right mind. Emotions snake our minds away from logic, and right now our survival requires logic.”
He had been making a point, not coming on to her. Confusion rioted through her, both longing for him to finish what he started and relief that he hadn't, and a pang of something deeper. Hurt? That he had led her on? Of course, he had, he was a man. Even alien men were the same, it seemed. What the hell was the matter with her? She was acting like some love struck teenager.
“What choice have you come to?”
He didn't mean about sex, either. Mia glared at the floor, she could feel a muscle twitching along her jaw. She had been thoroughly manipulated and it wasn't a nice feeling. Anger and wounded pride made her grit her teeth and take several deep breaths. She should tell the women, spread this truth he was so concerned about.
She wanted to, god did she want to, but she couldn't bring danger upon them out of spite.
“When you have more information, you will tell them?”
He nodded. “When we have an idea of the threat and a plan to counter it, you have my word.”
Huh. She didn't know how much his word meant, but he said it like it was important. She met his eyes and rose from the edge of his bed.
“I will keep the information for now. But you shouldn't wait long, nothing good ever comes from secrets.”
“Good,” he inclined his head in respect and moved away from the door he had been blocking.
Taking the hint, and packing up her wounded pride, she made her way to the door, but she couldn't, couldn't pass without comment.
“You seem to have lust and fear confused, or maybe you just lump them together here. Either way, enjoy your manipulation skills. Where I come from, they are what we call a red flag, we don't see that as a virtue.”
To her surprise, Draven let out a low chuckle and pressed an arm across the door, just as she was about to slip through. She considered ducking under, but he would probably move to stop her and she didn't want to risk touching him again Her face burned. So, it turned out Draven was a giant ass. She shouldn't be so surprised.
“A little fire. Maybe mouse wasn't the best descriptor. Let me explain something about this armor, Mia. It is an example of the highest reaches my people achieved in our technology before their downfall. It not only forms to the body and provides weapons on a whim, it also monitors all of our systems for our health and safety and sends the information to our neural chips in case there is something important in it. It can tell the second your blood sugars drop, your heart rate increases. It even records arousal. And according to this,” he tapped his temple, and she realized he must have a neural chip, as well, “you had some very interesting reactions to me while in my armor, none of which were fear. So, no, I have not confused lust with anything except lust.”
Mia nearly groaned out loud. She was an idiot.
“You want me, even if your mind has not accepted it yet. As for the rest,” he lifted his arm again, but did not move, his big body crowding the opening, “I will not apologize for any tactic I must take to keep my people alive. I will do it one hundred times over, no matter your censor, because survival trumps your feelings. Always.”
He was scolding her like a small child. Not only that, but he had called her out on her fib about being afraid of him. Shame flooded her, twisting the bits of anxiety higher. She just had to have the last word, didn't she? She couldn't have left with a little dignity intact, no she had to dig herself a hole. Dammit.
She slipped through the door, careful not to touch any part of him, and stormed down the hallway.
“Hey!” Kenahi let out a surprised yelp from the sitting room as she went by. She didn't stop. She burst out the door, surprising the guard there, as well, and made her way toward the dorms. She wanted to be as far away from any of the Livarians as she could get, and right now that meant the privacy of her shared room. She was several steps from the building before Kenahi caught up with her.
“Hey, what are you thinking, running out like that? You heard the meeting, no one goes anywhere alone, not even in the compound.”
“Great. You knew I was there, too?”
“Thalon alerted us as soon as you passed through the door.” He patted his light tool. Mia was starting to hate those things. “It was Draven's decision to let you overhear. He figured your nature wouldn't allow you to rest until you'd discovered what was happening, anyway.”
The knowledge did nothing to sooth her feelings.
“Why let me overhear if he wanted it kept a secret?” Had he simply caught her and sent her away there would have been no reason for that little scene in his bedroom.
Kenahi tilted his head. “My guess would be he wanted to know how you would react. Not everyone can handle the news of danger well.”
She grunted. She was too far beyond frustrated to care whether she had passed his little test. He was her captor, nothing more. And she was determined, from that point on, to remember it.