Chapter 44 Chapter Forty-One
Demi’s Point Of View
By the time dessert came out, the house had settled into that golden, hour comfort where everything felt slower and warmer, like time had decided to sit down with us for a while.
Alex’s mom placed a chocolate cake in the center of the dining table like it was a sacred object. Someone, Kyle, obviously actually gasped.
“You made this Mrs Ricci?” he asked.
“She always does” Alex said, fond and proud in a way that made my chest ache a little.
I helped pass out plates, careful again, always careful. Alex and I never stood directly next to each other for long.
We rotated naturally, like we’d rehearsed it, though we never had.
Maybe that was the dangerous part, how easy it was to act like nothing was going on when everything was.
When I finally sat down with my cake, Alex was across from me again. Chocolate on a fork. Elbows on knees. Comfortable.
He caught my eye and mouthed, ‘I’m gonna eat you like this piece of cake’, glancing at the size of his slice.
I mouthed back, ‘do it, coward’.
He smiled into his fork.
Around us, the parents had moved into their second wind. Wine glasses refilled.
Stories grew longer and less linear. Chris’s dads were teasing Alex’s dad about his grilling obsession.
“You name the grill” Micheal said. “That’s when it crossed into a lifestyle.”
“It has a name because it’s reliable” Alex’s dad-Fabio- shot back. “Unlike you, who burned hot dogs last Fourth of July”
“That was one time” Greg said mildly, then grinned. “And they were artisanal”
Laughter rippled through the room, full and unselfconscious.
This was what I loved about nights like this. The way everyone fit.
The way no one was trying to impress anyone else. It felt like family, even if some of us weren’t technically related.
Which made the secret sitting in my chest feel heavier.
After dessert, the adults drifted toward the dining room again, pulling out a trivia game none of the teenagers wanted to play.
That left us in the living room, lights dimmed just a little, the air buzzing with leftover energy.
Chris stretched out on the floor. “Movie or more games?”
“Games” Alex and I said at the exact same time.
Chris looked between us, suspicious. “You two are weirdly in sync tonight”
Alex shrugged too fast. “We’ve always been in sync.” He answered but coldly, no one noticed it but me.
Well and Chris because Chris raised a brow at him.
I pretended to be very interested in stacking empty plates.
We settled on a card game that required way too much close proximity. Knees bumped. Shoulders leaned. Someone’s head ended up in someone else’s lap, Chris, dramatic as ever.
Alex sat beside me this time, close enough that I could feel the warmth of his arm through my sweater.
“Relax” he murmured, eyes on the cards. “You’re so stiff”
“You’re too close” I whispered back.
“You’re the one who sat here”
“Yeah, because there was nowhere else.”
“There were literally three couches”
I glanced up at him a bit hurt. “Do you want me to move?”
He didn’t answer right away which made my stomach turn in unease.
“No” he said finally, quiet. “It’s fine”
It wasn’t fine.
It was dangerous in that slow, simmering way that made my fingers twitch and my thoughts wander.
I focused on the game, on the sound of laughter, on the way everything looked normal.
At one point, Alex leaned back to stretch, his arm briefly brushing behind me.
I caught my breath.
No one noticed. Or if they did, they didn’t say anything.
That almost made it worse.
.
.
.
Alex’s Point Of View
I was very aware of Demi.
Of the way he played with his curls when he’s was thinking. Of the way his foot tapped lightly against the carpet when he was nervous. Of the fact that I could probably identify his laugh in a crowded room with my eyes closed.
This friends with benefits thing was supposed to mean casual.
But sometimes it didn’t feel casual.
Chris eventually announced he was going to help his dads with trivia, mostly because they were apparently ‘getting destroyed by Mom level questions’
“Be right back” he said, pointing at us. “Don’t start a secret cult without me.”
Demi snorted. But I gave him a straight face.
I was still had my speculation that these two has or had something going on.
Angel had stepped out a few minutes ago to answer a call and Kyle was somewhere flirting with one of my mom’s friends daughter.
Once he was gone, the living room felt quieter, even though it really wasn’t. The TV glowed softly, paused on a menu screen. Somewhere down the hall, someone dropped a spoon.
Demi shifted beside me.
“You okay?” He asked.
“Yeah” I said. “You?”
“Yeah”
A pause.
“You’re lying” we both said at once.
He laughed, soft and a little breathless. “I just, this feels… louder tonight especially after our you know what”
I nodded. “We could go to my room for another round” I smirked
“You’re so annoying” he laughed which made me laugh
From the dining room came a burst of cheering. Someone had gotten an answer right.
“Do you ever think” Demi said slowly, “that we’re bad at this?”
“At what?”
“Keeping this a secret.”
I glanced at him then. His expression was careful but honest, eyes searching mine.
“There’s no ‘thing’” I said. “We’re just… two people feeling our sexual needs”
“Yeah. You’re right. I’m sorry”
I sighed. “You don’t need to apologize”
“Is there something on your mind Demi?” I asked concerned, my best friend looked so unease.
He hesitated. Just long enough.
“Its just,” he said, “it’s hard to pretend we’re sneaking around when I’m sitting on your couch with your family in the other room, and mind you, we’ve had sex on this couch.” He whispered the last part making me look around for listening ears.
My heart thudded painfully.
“Demi-“
Footsteps. Chris’s voice. The moment shattered like glass.
We leaned apart just as he re-entered the room, dramatically flopping back down.
“Okay, I cannot handle trivia anymore. Your mom is a menace.”
Demi smiled easily. Too easily. “Told you.”
I forced myself to breathe.
Later, when people started migrating again, bathroom breaks, snack refills, casual wandering, I found myself in the hallway outside my room.
Demi stepped out of the bathroom across from me, hands still damp from washing.
We froze.
The hallway was empty. Quiet.
He looked at me, eyes wide, then softer.
“Two minutes,” he whispered. “That’s all.”
I hesitated.
Then I opened my bedroom door.
He slipped inside like he has done a hundred times before.
I closed the door quietly, leaning my forehead against it for half a second before turning around.
Demi stood near my desk, hands clasped, suddenly unsure.
“I know I said we could come up to my room to you know what, but I don’t think we shou-” I started.
“I know,” he said. “I just needed-“
I crossed the room before he finished.
I didn’t kiss him. I didn’t touch him in the way I wanted to.
I just pulled him into a hug.
He melted into me immediately, arms wrapping tight around my waist, face pressed against my neck.
We stayed like that, breathing each other in, grounding.
“This is worse,” he murmured.
“I know.”
“Because it feels like more.”
I rested my chin on his shoulder. “Except it isn’t”
He was quiet for a moment.
“Yeah”
I closed my eyes.
Before I could say anything else, there was a knock on the door.
“Alex?” my mom called. “Have you seen Demi?”
Demi stiffened.
I gently let go, stepping back. “Uh, yeah. He was just, uh, helping me find something.”
The door opened before I could stop it.
My mom’s eyes flicked between us. Took in the distance. The flushed faces.
Then she smiled.
“There you are,” she said to Demi. “We’re about to start another game.”
Demi smiled back, polite and composed. “Coming.”
As he passed me, his fingers brushed mine.
Just once.
The rest of the night passed in a blur of sound and light and almosts.
By the time coats were being gathered and hugs exchanged, my head felt full.
Demi hugged my mom goodbye, then my little sister Arabella, my dad gave him a pat on the back.
When he reached me, he just dabbed me up.
“Good night” he said.
“Night bro” I replied and I could feel the cringe.
As I watched him walk away, laughing with Chris, a sour feeling filled my chest.