Chapter 35 RESET
The feeling of cold water splashing over her body woke Maeve up.
It wasn’t a jolt, because this body of hers couldn’t jolt, young bodies performed such miracles. Instead, it was a weak croak that escaped her lips as she tried to sit up, practically heating the joints of her body cracking as water dripped all over her body.
“All you do is sleep, huh?! Is that the reason why you can’t pay your rent?!”
Rent. Rent?
Maeve’s body felt strangely heavy. Heavier than normal. Like she had been sleeping for hours and her body was just waking from hibernation. She stared at her hands, at her tanned skin with scars— the vision in front of her changed to something paler. Smoother.
Then it disappeared as her landlady’s hand began snapping in front of her, “Hello?! Anyone up there?!”
Maeve looked at her. She looked different. Softer. More… pliable. Even her voice sounded strange as she said, “I’m… I’m sorry. I have to… I have to go to work,”
“What? Woman, get back here!”
Maeve had read about something like this before. A moment in one’s life where it seemed that their life was unreal, like they were stuck in a loop with no way of escape. That was exactly how she had been feeling a few days ago. Like she was stuck in an endless loop and she couldn’t run to anyone else.
So she had thought of doing something else.
But what happened? What stopped her? And why couldn’t she remember?
When she got to work, she tried to stay as quiet as possible. She held her bag to her chest, keeping her head down so she wouldn’t bring any problems to herself or get noticed— but that didn’t work.
People kept shoving at her, some even dumping things on her body like she wasn’t even there in the first place. The second she got to her office table, her senior colleagues kept placing their work on her table, saying they had issues with their work and she was the best in their department so she should do it.
Maeve said nothing. Because she never had anything to say before. She knew how it would go. They would make it seem like it was all in her head, or mock how she looked, or how she smelled. Or anything about her that they could find. And she wouldn’t win. She knew that.
Yet… yet, deep down, that wasn’t really bothered.
Something… something felt really wrong. Like a bad dream. Or stimulation. Like… there was something she had to look out for, search for. It spread all over her body like an itch, and her hand reached out to dig into her nails to stop herself from spiraling.
“Do you really still do that?”
Her boyfriend, Albert, was staring at her with a look she had come to realize years later was disgust. Maybe at the beginning, he tried his best at hiding it but when he realized she just couldn’t see it, he stopped pretending completely. But now, Maeve could tell.
She dragged down the shirt of her sleeve, her eyes that had been darting around focused on him now as she said, “W-What are you doing here?”
“Claire told me you looked weird,” Albert let out a sigh, his eyes moving past her before moving down to look at her as he nudged his head, “Your clothes smell wet. Did you even change them before you came outside? And they look dirty too. Don’t you ever worry about how the people around you feel? How your friend Claire feels?”
Maeve could feel the pain spreading through her chest. She wanted to curl into a ball. Or vanish. Or curl into the floor. She wasn’t sure. But she didn’t want to be here anymore. “Claire is not my friend.”
“What? I can’t hear you if all you’re going to do is mumble. You know how much I hate it when you do that,”
Maeve wanted to yell at him so he could fully grasp that she didn’t like Claire. And she especially didn’t like Claire after catching him inside her like he was last night but she didn’t say anything. The same way she didn’t say anything last night.
Instead, her nails dug into her skin, sending a shot of pain through her body that felt like a mini distraction from the one spreading through her chest as she said as loud as she could, “She’s not my friend,”
They were sitting down below at the cafe where she worked so it was as quiet as a cafe could be, so Maeve was sure everyone could hear how loud her heart was beating— one of them being Albert, which she thought was because of how he was looking at her.
See, Albert had already known her and Claire weren’t friends. He might be a little stupid but he wasn’t dense. He had watched how quiet she would become whenever Claire appeared around them, how she seemed to always grow quieter when they met.
But he had always known Maeve to be quiet and to herself all the time so it wasn’t anything new.
And for some reason… why did it seem as if this was the first time he was really looking at his girlfriend?
Her eyes were a soft brown, but they reminded him of a Milky Way somehow. Like space… but with a large collection of stars spinning around her pupil. Burning as brightly as possible.
Just like how she looked when they first met.
“Have you told her yet, baby?”
He smelled Claire’s citric perfume before she placed a glossy lip on his cheek. He jolted slightly, his eyes moving to her before going back to Maeve whose dead eyes stared at the both of them like this was something that was none of her business and wanted to go on with her life as fast as possible. “N-not yet,”
Maeve’s eyes fell on Claire. Beautiful, popular Claire. Always happy Claire. Always taking her boyfriend’s time. His attention. His laughter. Things she had come to learn how to live without.
She also knew outwardly, to them, she didn’t look like she was showing any emotion, but deep down… Maeve couldn’t breathe. Of course she had known this day would come. Claire had left many signs to make Maeve aware of her boyfriend’s cheating. She had also left the door slightly open at Albert’s place open so when he walked in, he’d see them together.
Maeve knew all of this. She knew.
But Albert… Albert was hers. He didn’t even… he didn’t even need to love her. He didn’t… he didn’t need to like her. She had lost everything. She was losing everything. And she had nothing to her name.
But him…
The tears were already gathering in her eyes but she couldn’t afford letting them see it. So instead, she shot up from her seat, clenching her purse tight to her chest as she said to Albert, “Text me when you get home, okay?”
She turned to leave, ready to find the nearest toilet and hide there for as long as she could before her lunch break was over but before she could even get the opportunity to run away and do that, she felt soft hands on her skin, “Oh for gods sake, stay and—”
Maeve whipped around with a speed she didn’t even know her aching body had as she yelled, “LEAVE ME ALONE!”
Somehow, the purse was in her hand and then it wasn’t— it flew out of her grasp as well, hitting Claire right in the middle of her face. The blood flow from it was immediate and the woman’s scream came after.
The café erupted after that.