Chapter 14 Fourteen
The morning after Ezra and Orion stood in the winter field like two shadows thrown by the same moon, I woke with a heaviness in my chest I could not shake. The bond hummed quietly beneath my skin, warm and steady, yet Orion’s scent lingered on my pillow like a memory of safety I was afraid to lose.
When I stepped outside, frost glimmered across the ground like glass. My breath formed soft white clouds in the cold air. Orion leaned against the wooden railing, waiting for me. His posture looked calm, but his eyes were shadowed with exhaustion.
He turned when he heard my footsteps. “You did not sleep,” he said.
“Neither did you,” I answered softly.
He gave a tired half smile. “I could not. Every time I closed my eyes I felt the bond pulling you away.”
I wrapped my arms around myself. “It is not pulling me away from you. It is pulling me toward him. There is a difference.”
“Not to me,” he whispered.
His words pierced my heart. I stepped closer and reached out to touch his face. Orion leaned into my hand as if the contact was something he had been craving for hours.
“Talk to me,” he said quietly. “Tell me what you feel right now.”
I lowered my eyes. “I feel torn. I feel guilty. I feel like I am hurting you even though I never wanted to.”
He placed his hand gently over mine. “Zara. I love you. I am not ashamed to say it anymore. But love is pain sometimes and I am willing to hold it for you.”
My breath caught. “You should not have to.”
“I know,” he said softly. “But I will.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but the bond pulsed suddenly, warm and steady like a hand resting on my heart. A familiar presence brushed against me. I straightened sharply.
Orion noticed immediately. “He is near.”
I nodded slowly. “Yes.”
The ache was not painful this time. It felt like warmth spreading through my chest, like the sun reaching for me. I hated how comforting it felt. I hated that it made my body react without my permission.
Orion’s jaw tightened with hurt. “Zara. Look at me. Stay with me in this moment.”
I forced myself to meet his gaze. “I am here.”
His voice cracked slightly. “Are you.”
Before I could respond, the bond surged again. The air shifted. Footsteps approached the clearing. I closed my eyes as recognition washed over me.
Ezra.
His presence filled the cold morning like a rising tide.
Orion stiffened but did not move away from me. When I turned, Ezra stood a few paces away, tall and calm, his breath forming mist in the cold air. His dark hair was damp with frost, and his gaze was locked on mine with a tenderness that made my stomach twist painfully.
“Zara,” he said softly.
My heart reacted instantly. My chest warmed. My breath caught.
Orion moved in front of me instinctively. “Why are you here.”
Ezra did not look away from me. “Because she feels me. And because I feel her.”
Orion stepped closer, fists clenched. “You cannot appear every time the bond moves.”
Ezra finally turned his head slightly. “I do not appear every time. Only when the bond calls strongly. And today it did.”
Orion’s voice held anger but also desperation. “She is trying to fight it.”
Ezra’s expression softened. “I know. I feel her struggle. I feel every part of it.”
I trembled. “You feel it.”
Ezra took a slow step forward. “Every moment. Every breath. Every time your heart pulls toward me, I feel it.”
My chest tightened painfully.
Orion shook his head. “Stop saying it like you are something she needs.”
Ezra looked at him with surprising calm. “I am something she is bound to. Not by force. By fate.”
Orion’s voice was almost a growl. “Do not talk about fate as if it gives you permission to steal her.”
Ezra inhaled slowly. “I am not stealing her. I am answering her.”
“Answering what,” Orion snapped.
Ezra looked back at me. “Her longing.”
My entire body froze. “I do not long for you.”
Ezra stepped closer but remained at a respectful distance. “Then why does your heartbeat speed up when I am near.”
I felt heat blossom under my skin.
Orion turned toward me sharply. “Zara. Tell him it means nothing.”
I opened my mouth, but the words tangled painfully.
Ezra spoke quietly. “You do not have to lie.”
“I am not lying,” I said quickly. “I do not want this bond.”
Ezra nodded. “I know. But the bond wants you.”
Orion moved closer to me. “She chooses me.”
Ezra’s voice was soft. “Perhaps. But the bond chooses me.”
I closed my eyes as tears burned behind them.
Ezra’s voice reached me again, gentle and warm. “Look at me, Zara.”
Against my will, my eyes opened. Ezra’s gaze caught mine instantly. The bond pulsed with heat and I felt something inside me respond like a flower turning toward sunlight.
Ezra’s voice dropped even softer. “Breathe.”
I exhaled shakily.
He stepped forward until he stood only a few feet away. His voice caressed my senses. “Talk to me. Tell me what hurts.”
I swallowed. “Everything.”
“What part hurts most,” he asked.
“The part where I am breaking Orion,” I whispered.
Orion’s breath trembled, but he held his chin high.
Ezra’s expression softened with a kind of sorrow that surprised me. “I do not want to break him. I respect him.”
Orion scoffed. “Then step back.”
Ezra met his eyes. “I will not step away from my mate.”
The word mate hit me like a pulse. My heart responded instantly. Ezra felt it too. His breath caught and he took another step toward me.
Orion moved between us again. “Stop moving toward her.”
Ezra’s jaw tightened as he fought to control the bond’s pull. “Then stop blocking her.”
“She is mine,” Orion said quietly, voice trembling. “She was mine first.”
Ezra’s voice held something like grief. “She was never meant to be yours.”
Orion’s shoulders fell. “I know.”
The pain in his voice cracked me open.
Ezra turned back to me again. “Zara. Tell me what you want right now. Not forever. Just this moment.”
My breath shook. “I do not know.”
He stepped closer. “Then tell me what you feel.”
I pressed a hand to my chest. “I feel pulled.”
Ezra’s voice softened. “Toward me.”
“Yes,” I whispered.
Orion looked away, face crumpling.
Ezra took a careful step closer. “Then let yourself feel it.”
“I am scared,” I whispered.
Ezra’s voice was warm and steady. “You do not have to be.”
Orion finally broke. “Stop telling her she is safe with you. You are her bond, not her comfort.”
Ezra shook his head. “I can be both.”
Orion’s voice rose. “You cannot.”
“You do not know that,” Ezra replied gently.
“Because you are the one fate picked,” Orion said, voice sharp and raw. “But I am the one she loved first.”
Ezra looked at him with surprising respect. “I do not deny that.”
Orion’s voice cracked as he whispered, “Then do not take her from me.”
The air hung heavy with pain.
Ezra spoke after a long moment. “I am not taking her. But she is being pulled. And the more she resists, the more she hurts.”
I felt my body sway slightly, overwhelmed by all of it.
Ezra stepped forward instinctively and reached out a hand. “Zara.”
Orion grabbed my arm protectively. “She stays with me.”
Ezra’s eyes met mine. “Do you want to stay with him right now.”
My head spun. “I do not know what I want.”
Ezra nodded slowly. “Then let me hold you for one moment. Just one. To ease the bond.”
“No,” Orion said instantly. “Absolutely not.”
Ezra’s voice stayed calm. “You felt what happened last time she resisted.”
Orion’s eyes flickered with fear and memory.
I placed a trembling hand on Orion’s chest. “Orion. I cannot breathe well.”
He closed his eyes, agony etched across his face.
Ezra stepped closer, voice warm and gentle. “Zara. Come here.”
Orion’s grip loosened.
My legs moved without permission.
Ezra closed the distance slowly and placed his hands gently on my arms. The moment he touched me the bond surged with warmth. My heart steadied. My breath calmed. My chest loosened.
Ezra exhaled softly. “There you are.”
The relief washed over me so intensely I nearly collapsed against him, but he held me upright with careful strength.
Orion turned away and covered his mouth with his hand, shoulders shaking.
Ezra whispered into my hair, “I have you.”
I whispered back, trembling. “I know.”
He tightened his hold slightly, a quiet promise. “I will not let you fall.”
I kept my forehead against his chest until the warmth of the bond settled into a steady hum.
When I stepped back, Ezra let me go instantly, hands falling to his sides. His gaze held tenderness and restraint.
Orion wiped tears from his face before turning. “Zara. Come to me.”
I moved toward him slowly. He took my face in his hands and rested his forehead against mine.
His voice was broken. “I love you. And I am scared I am losing you.”
Tears filled my eyes. “I do not want to lose you.”
Ezra spoke from behind us, voice quiet but firm. “You are not losing her. But you cannot stop the bond.”
Orion glared at him. “You do not get to decide what I lose.”
Ezra shook his head. “No. Fate decided that long ago.”
Orion stepped back from me, face raw with pain. “Zara. Tell me you want me.”
I choked on the words. “I do.”
Ezra’s voice wrapped around me. “And tell the truth. Tell us both what your heart feels.”
My breath shook uncontrollably. “It feels both of you.”
Orion closed his eyes.
Ezra inhaled deeply.
Tears streamed down my cheeks. “I do not know how to choose.”
Ezra said gently, “You do not have to choose today.”
Orion whispered, “But you will eventually.”
The wind rustled through the trees as if the forest itself listened.
Ezra stepped back. “I will give you time.”
Orion stepped forward. “I will give you love.”
My heart pulled in two directions, and I had no idea which path it would break first.