"Will you be the one to teach me?" I ask turning further into the warmth of his touch. He smiles for the first time since the conversation took a bad turn. I don't know what fear it is that is controlling me from getting closer. One moment I want it then the next I don't. He told me because he wanted me to be ready if my heat were to come earlier than what they had originally thought. "If I go into heat next week and I want it, will you give it to me?" I ask him quietly not brave enough to meet his eyes. "I- I don't know." He stutters. When I turn to him I see him looking vulnerable. His hand is shaking lightly but he's quick to clench his fist to stop it. "I would want to, I want to now but I will be loyal to you when I say that I will not mate you till you are of age." Smiling at him I step forward and gently run my hand down his cheek. It calms him and I can see the stress visibly fall from him as he rolls his shoulders back. "You are way too good for me." He scoffs but doesn't break eye contact, "You deserve way more than what I can give you." Wrapping my hand around his neck I force him to bend down closer to me. "Shut up, you idiot. You're perfect and I love you." Smiling he comes back down to kiss me quickly as his arms move back around me. "When you do go into heat I promise you that you'll love it." "Well aren't you cocky." I smirk at him and he smirks back at me. We spend the rest of the afternoon together curled up on the blanket. It was after an hour that he told me that he was going to go somewhere and he'll be back soon. Not even ten minutes later his wolf comes prancing back into my sight with a basket in his mouth and an extra blanket thrown over his back. He drops the basket down near my feet and shakes the blanket down on top of my head. When I scold him for doing so he lets out a throaty bark that I pass it off as a chuckle. When he comes back he lies down he pulls the other blanket around me since he was lying on the cold ground just because he was worried about me being cold. The basket has food in it and we lie together talking with him passing food to me as he tells me stories about his childhood. A lot of them were about his mother and only once had he mentioned his father and even then I could hear the difference in the tone his voice took. He quickly drops the subject and that's when I realise that it's gotten dark and that I had snuggled in closer to his side to keep warm in the cold weather that Jordena seems to take during night hours. "Can we stay out here for the night instead of going back?" I ask him trying to pull his attention away from whatever bad thoughts he's having. "When you have your weight back up but not now it's too cold but trust me when we do I'll have other ways of keeping you warm." I give him a short burst of laughter that I have to cover my mouth to prevent the horrid sound from continuing. "You really are cocky aren't you?" We stay out for a little while longer before we go back to the castle at a slower pace with both of the blankets securely wrapped around me. I feel relaxed with him but when we get back to the castle that quickly disappears when Alexander storms over to us. Ryder had changed back at the barn and when he sees that his father is angry he pushes me behind him and my guards seem to appear out of nowhere to flank him. "Where have you been?" He's angry but he doesn't wait for a reply from his son. "Get her somewhere safe now and follow me there's an attack in the city and they're getting close to the castle." Ryder tenses and gives Reynolds a nod. When Reynolds places a hand down onto my lower back I turn out of his hold and grab onto Ryder around the neck pulling myself to his chest. "Lottie, it's ok. I'll be ok. Go with Reynolds and I'll see you soon." He says quietly and I can almost sense Alexander's frustration at our interaction and my guards' nervousness. "I love you." He sighs holding me to his kiss and once again I get a desperate and rough kiss from him and just like before he needs it and so do it and unlike I thought I was actually ready to receive it from him. In it is a promise that he will be back for me and it's also a goodbye. I've just grown the courage to get close to him and now the rebels are going to take him away from me. "I love you and if you don't come back I'll kill them myself." I say as I press another kiss to his lips before he nods at Reynolds. "You'll make a perfect queen." He says mostly to his father with a smirk. I can't react to his words as I allow Reynold's to pull me away and up to the safety of the room as I watch him and father shift without a moment's hesitation or to worry about their clothes as they run to protect their kingdom. The moment I see him leave I feel an ache in my chest.