Chapter 165: #3 Chapter 50

Ravazzani Estate, Siderno

"What's wrong with Zia GiGi?"

I could hear Raffaele's voice from the other end of the pool as he asked his mother-again-what was wrong with me.

If only I could explain it.

"She's just a little sad, baby," Frankie said to the four-year-old boy.

"But she's been sad for days," he complained.

"Sometimes that happens."

"Why is she sad?"

I could feel tears threatening again as I stared out over the rolling hills of the estate. I should leave. I thought coming out to the pool and getting some fresh air would be a nice change from staying in my room, moping. I was wrong. Out here, I was ruining everyone's fun.

"That's none of our business," Frankie said. "And it's not polite to talk about other people."

A small finger tapped my shoulder. I looked over and found Noemi, my two-year-old niece. "Here, Zia." She held out a small yellow flower. "Feel better."

God, these kids.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and accepted the tiny bloom. "Thanks, Mimi," I croaked, using the nickname I'd coined for her because it was like mine. "You're so sweet."

The little girl skipped off toward the vegetable garden. I twirled the stem in my fingers and watched the petals spin. When would this heaviness leave my chest? I've been here for five days. I should feel better already.

You were just pussy to me, nothing more.

I dragged in a deep breath and tried not to think about him. He didn't deserve my time and energy, not after the hurtful things he'd said.

If only my heart was on the same page. I knew Enzo was an asshole, but I couldn't stop thinking about the way he'd made me feel. Like he saw me, like he cared about me. Like I mattered to him.

Lies. It had been nothing more than lies. I couldn't forget it.

Someone sat next to me and I didn't need to look over to know who it was. I could always sense when my twin was nearby.

"You're not ruining anything," Emma said. "So put that right out of your mind."

Unsurprising that she'd read my thoughts. "But-"

"They're kids, Gia. They've already forgotten about you. See?"

It was true. A laughing Raffaele was jumping off the side of the pool into Frankie's arms, and Noemi was eating peas in Zia's garden. "I'm sorry," I couldn't help but say.

"There's nothing to apologize for. We're worried, that's all."

"I'll be fine."

"That's what you keep saying."

"Because it's true." Soon I would forget all about Enzo D'Agostino.

Sighing, Emma wrapped her arm around me and dropped her head on my shoulder. We watched Raffaele-mini-Fausto-splash around in the pool. Really, what more could be said?

I'd filled my sisters in on everything when I arrived in Siderno. Well, not everything. I told them the sex was consensual and fun, that it meant nothing. I didn't tell them about the cage. I didn't reveal how Enzo had degraded me and how much I enjoyed it. I certainly didn't tell them that I'd fallen in love with him.

They would have me committed.

The nanny came out to collect Raffaele and Noemi for their naps. Frankie got out of the pool with her son, then kissed both kids and promised to see them in a few hours. She walked over toward us, a tiny baby bump peeking out from her bikini. I thought she might get back in the pool, but she sat on my other side instead, her feet dangling in the clear water.

"I hate seeing you like this," Frankie said after she settled. "It makes me wish that Fausto had killed Enzo that day on the yacht."

I didn't regret keeping Enzo alive. Even though he'd broken my heart, Enzo didn't deserve to die. His children had lost their mother; they shouldn't lose their father, too. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine. You aren't sleeping, you aren't eating. You're not even drawing or designing. All you do is lay in bed."

Sisters were a pain in the ass sometimes. "I went through a traumatic experience, Frankie. Maybe it's PTSD."

Emma stared at her feet and I knew she didn't believe me. After all, she'd been on the yacht and saw me on Enzo's lap, eating from his hand. "You have a broken heart," my twin said. "You're in love with him."

Frankie shook her head. "God, that is really fucking hard for me to understand."

My oldest sister was starting to piss me off. "Really? You fell in love with Fausto, who kidnapped you and brought you to Italy to marry his son. Can you really not understand what I'm going through?"

"It's not the same. Enzo kidnapped me when I was pregnant, Gigi. He put a gun in my mouth. Che cazzo?"

She often switched between Italian and English now, so this didn't surprise me. "Fausto kidnapped Enzo's kids and held them at gunpoint. His kids, Frankie. Babies in their pajamas. So please get off your high horse."

Emma leaned forward, her brow wrinkled as she looked at Frankie. "Is this true?"

"Yes, it's fucking true," I snapped.

Frankie pushed to her feet and dragged a hand through her wet hair. "Okay, fine, but Fausto only did that to rescue me. Did you not hear the part about me being kidnapped and a gun forced into my mouth?"

"Think about your kids," I said, shifting to see her better. "Think about how you would feel if someone took them from their beds, kidnapped them and held them at gunpoint."

She pressed her lips together and closed her eyes. "I didn't agree with that choice at the time. I tried to apologize to them and I made sure-"

When she didn't finish I instantly knew. "You made Fausto promise not to hurt them."

"Yes," she said after a long pause. "But I don't believe the promise was actually necessary. Fausto wouldn't have hurt Enzo's family."

"Now who is being foolish?"

Frankie's neck flushed as she folded her arms across her chest. "You're being a real bitch, you know that? You need to lash out at someone? Fine. I guess it can be me. It's certainly not the first time."

I got to my feet, anger burning hot in my lungs. "I'd rather be a bitch than a naive mafia wife. You excuse whatever Fausto does because he's your husband. You sound like Mamma."

Frankie's face paled. "Take that back. I am nothing like her and Fausto is nothing like Papa."

I lifted my hands. "I'm sorry, but don't you see the hypocrisy? And what the fuck is wrong with us? We all swore to get out of this world, not to end up with mafia men, and instead we both fell in love with one. Jesus Christ. If anyone should know better, it's a Mancini daughter."

While my twin stood and put her arm around me, Frankie didn't move, just stared off across the estate at the vineyard. "I never wanted this for myself or for either of you," Frankie said. "It was why I never argued with Papa over my future, so that you two would be able to make your own choices. I wanted you to have a different life, one with freedoms I never had."