People stared at me.
It was the first thing that grabbed my attention later that afternoon as I made my way outside, hoping to have a walk and a breath of fresh air to help with the stifling feeling I’d felt since Amelia left, and when I stumbled on myself just outside the house, someone yelled out, “Be careful there.”
I reddened, mumbling a string of apologies before dashing off, hurrying down the concrete steps and disappearing into the sheltered garden that lay just up ahead, and only when I was out of view of everyone else did I find it in me to breathe better, but still, the heaviness in my chest remained.
I couldn’t get her out of my head. I didn't think I ever would. From my first meeting with her, Amelia had occupied my thoughts, the image of her lingering in my head, and there was nothing I hated more than the fact that I felt incomparable to the woman while knowing that I shouldn’t even be comparing myself to her.
We were opposites in every way two people could be, and I found myself asking things I didn't think I wanted to know the answer to. Did Callan notice the glaring difference between us? Did he think she was a better woman suited to be by his side because it was obvious she was? Amelia didn't seem like the kind of woman who would take any form of abuse from anyone, much less Alexander. She looked like she could stand up for herself and would hurt anyone who dared to attempt hurting her or taking something that belonged to her, someone like me.
I let out a sardonic laugh directed at myself at the thought. There was no way to the moon and back that I could have someone like Callan to myself, and seeing as I had yet to see him, the reality was sure now. We were back to his pack. He had saved me as he had promised, and with the fulfillment of his words, he no longer had any need to have to see me. This was his territory, and in here, he was an Alpha, and I was no more than a guest his betrothed would take care of.
Despite how I’d simplified it, each word of that thought tore at my insides violently, causing my stomach to sink further and further down until I could feel nothing but pain breaking and threatening to swallow me whole. How could anything hurt me from the inside like this?
My eyes blurred as I watched a tiny, red bird settle itself on the bench next to me, and I sat in silence with it, obscuring my mind from going haywire by letting the small animal protect me from my own self. That was until a ruffle from the bushes sent it flying away.
I didn't look back at the intruder, but when eventually he made his way to my front, dead leaves crunching underneath his heavy steps, I saw it indeed was Radley, as always, being an intruder. His dark eyes set on me, and I saw them run over my body, noticing every difference in my appearance, and that alone disgusted me.
“What do you want?” I found myself asking.
One of his brows lifted in surprise at my tone. “Ah, I see you've settled in already. Made yourself home, haven't you?”
I said nothing and simply stared straight ahead. There was everything off about Radley, and it had nothing to do with the fact that he had obvious disdain for me. No, the man actually had something about him. I couldn't place my hand on what it was exactly, but I could recognize the sinister look behind his eyes, a look I could easily tell because I’d grown accustomed to it. A part of me feared who Radley really was, but yet again, that had nothing to do with me.
“Did you not hear me speak to you?“ he barked, his voice slicing through the silence.
My eyes slowly went up to meet his. “Yes, I have.”
He chuckled to himself, one that didn't reach his eyes. “Do you even realize the impact of what your one little action has caused, Sophia? Or were you simply thinking of only yourself when you'd attempted murder, knowing Callan was going to save you?” The fury he felt caused his voice to shake.
My heart plummeted.
“It was a mistake,” I said quietly, remembering the feeling of Alexander on my body. It felt as though a thousand tiny insects were crawling over me—my arms, chest, and legs—invading all of me. I let out an involuntary shudder.
“No, Sophia, a mistake is spilling something, breaking something. There is no world that a mistake is attempting to kill someone, the same person who has housed and sheltered you for most of your life,” he paused, his eyes burning into me. “It just shows where your loyalty lies: to no one. You can believe me when I swear on my life that even if it is the last thing I do, I shall make sure Callan sees you for what you truly are: a cunning, scheming woman!”
His words hit me hard. They were the most brutal things anyone had ever said to me, and it hurt down to every single nerve in my body, stinging so hard I had to stop myself from curling into me and letting my emotions show.
I cleared my throat. “Are you done?” I asked.
His face burned redder with a level of anger I didn't know he could attain.
I got up. “Because if you are, I have nothing else to say to you.”
As I made to pass him by, a hand shot out and grabbed me by the arm roughly, pulling me back.
“When I speak,” he said in a dangerous voice. “You dare not walk out on me. You are here now, and I am your Beta, so when I fucking speak, Sophia, you stand with your head bowed and listen like the docile subject you are. Do you understand?”
His grip was tight, shrinking the part of my arm he held so much that I fought the urge to cry out.
“Let me go,” I said in a small voice.
“Do you understand?” he roared.
“Yes,” I said, this time unable to stop a tear from rolling down my cheek.
He let go of me, and I stumbled backward away from him, his menacing look was completely obvious now as we locked eyes.
“A good lesson on manners once in a while shall prove to be something useful to you.”
And with that, he stalked off, and it was only when he was gone did I allow myself to fall heavily on the bench, my chest rapidly heaving up and down.
I was going to have to fight him too, but for the life of me, I couldn't find the strength to. I was tired of fighting.