Chapter 22
Ruby
Owen takes me home immediately, this time I tell him to leave me a few meters from home, I cannot risk having him in my room now. Despite feeling bad, I still want to be with him, I want him near me, I want him to hold me until I fall asleep. He asks me what it is, but I just brush him off, I tell him I will let him know when I am alright.
“How could you do this to me, how could you shatter my heart like that, Ruby? I felt everything, I felt it. And I can smell him all over you. Why!” Damien breaks down the moment he sees me, he is sitting in the resting area outside our house. “I felt the pain, it pierced right through my heart. You've shattered me.” he adds. I can't stop the tears brimming out of my eyes. Guilt washes over me, I love him so much and I don't want to see him this hurt, but I also love the other two.
“I didn't mean to hurt you, I couldn’t control myself.” I try to explain. I feel so guilty.
“You are my mate Ruby, my Luna, how am I going to look at you now. You disgust me, Ruby.” I feel every word he says, every utter breaks me literally. I cannot bear him speaking like that to me. I feel so dirty. “Even after feeling like this, my heart only beats for you, Ruby. I cannot get you out of my head, and I can't bring myself to reject you.” He says, sitting on the floor and hugging his knees as he cries.
“I am so sorry Damien, please forgive me, I didn’t mean to do it. It’s just that when I am with one of you I feel completely immersed, I forget the rest of the world even exists. It’s like I am always another person.” I try to explain myself. “I can’t hurt you intentionally, Damien. I can’t whatever you feel, I feel it too, deeper and intense. Please believe me.” I add, kneeling beside him and taking his hand. He immediately looks at me. He stares for a long while before clearing his throat, “Be mine alone please Ruby, I beg you.” He wipes his tears.
I get up and walk away from him a little.
“Please be mine Ruby, I can’t afford to share you with any of them, and I can’t afford to lose you either.” He walks up to me and circles his arms around my waist.
“I don’t know what to say, Damien.” I say, still looking away from him. The thought of losing Owen and Rowan over Damien doesn’t sit with me well.
“Say yes then, my love.” He pleads, leaving my waist and circling back to face me.
“I can’t Damien, I want you all equally.” I say.
“Please don’t say that, please my Luna, I need you.”
“They need me as well, Damien just as you do. I can’t be the one to decide who I hurt and who I don’t.” I say from my heart.
“Please, we are the same, we are wolves Ruby, biologically, and logically, we are supposed to be together.” He explains.
“What I am asking myself is the fact that the moon goddess paired me with the three of you. Don’t you think there is a reason why she did that, Damien.” He thinks for a while before answering.
“Maybe it was a mistake.”
“No Damien, how do you explain the feelings I have for them?” I ask.
“I can’t share you, Ruby, I am sorry.”
“What do you mean by that? Please don’t reject me?”
“I am sorry Ruby I can’t, I better hurt now, than hurt for the rest of my life.” The thought of him leaving me breaks my heart.
“Don’t do it please, don’t shatter my heart please, and don’t make me go through all the pain.”
“I have to go.” He says simply and walks away.
“Don’t leave me, please.” I call after him, but he doesn’t even look behind. I only see his clothes ripping apart and in seconds a huge gray alpha wolf appears as he runs off to the woods. I want to run after him, but I can’t, I cannot leave Damien and Rowan. I am in such a dilemma.
I run to my room confused about what to do, I am confused, I don’t deserve all this at all. And they don’t either. There is only one…
“I am not going to accept to lose you just like that, not after what we shared, Ruby no, you only belong to me.” Owen's sudden outburst shots me off the bed. What’s he doing here, I said I didn’t want to see him, not now at least.
“I am sorry, Ruby, you are mine.” He says, walking towards me and yanking me off the bed and pulling me towards his chest. He circles his arms around me tightly and all I can feel is his breath fanning my face. His ruby eyes enchant me and I get lost in them.
‘Just take me, please, don’t let me go.’ I hear his voice in my mind.
I didn’t know he could speak in my head like that.
‘Yes Ruby there are so many things you don’t know about me, but I am sure if you give me a chance, you will get to know the real me even better.’ He adds in my head. I hate it when he does that, why would he do something I warned him not to do.
“I am so sorry Ruby, I couldn’t help it, I just found myself getting inside your head. Your mind always fascinates me.” He says out loud.
“But you don’t respect me Owen, I asked you not to do it, and you promised you won't but look, you are going back on your words. A moment ago, I asked you to give me a little space. But look where you are now?” I say, trying to remove myself from his clutches. He reluctantly let's me go.
“Just go Owen.” I really need to be alone.
"I will go for now but I will be back baby, you can't get rid of me that easily." He says. He slowly kisses my lips before vanishing. I throw myself on my bed and start sobbing the pain out.