Janice POV
I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, and once I stormed into my room, I slammed the door closed and leaned against it, breathing fast.
"Stop it... Stop it, please... Stop it," I muttered as I hit my chest repeatedly, but all attempts to stop my heart from beating fast proved abortive.
Slowly, I dragged myself from the door and advanced toward the bed, slumping on it.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and bit into my lip nervously. For a moment back there, I wanted him to kiss me and do other things to me, I didn't care back there if he felt something for me or not, but I was glad that I was able to resist him.
I was still trying to get over the shit he put me through when the door burst open and he barged inside. I rose to my feet.
"Wh... what are you doing..." I couldn't finish my statement when he covered the distance between us and pulled me close to himself. And as our body collided, I felt it again. The burning sensation in between my legs, the crazy cravings that were messing with my head, the burning desire, and the pleasure from nothing. It was so intense. The feelings were fucking intense that I didn't know whether I'll be able to control it this time.
"What have you done to me, Janice? Why are you messing with my head?" With his eyes piercing into mine, he whispered those words that made my heart flutter and my abdomen twitch.
"Why am I suddenly going crazy because of you? Why can't I bear seeing you with another man?" His eyes were filled with sincerity, but why do I still feel like he was messing with me even with that expression on his face?
"Let go of me," I tried to sound angry and push him off, but my voice betrayed me at that moment as it came out soft and seductive.
"Are you sure you don't want this? Are you sure you want me to leave you alone?" His voice was domineering, his eyes stripping me out of my clothes, and as his warm breath caressed my face, I felt the hotness right between my legs. My legs shook, growing weaker.
"This is what you've always wanted, Janice. Why are you hesitating?" My subconscious mind reminded me, and I bit my bottom lip and swallowed the lump that formed in my throat. Yes, this is what I wanted, but I suddenly didn't feel like it because, to him, it was just going to be like every fling he's had with women out there. At first, I didn't care but just wanted him to do it with me, but right now, I wasn't sure I wanted to give my virginity to someone who wasn't even worth it.
"I don't want this... I don't want to..." With all the strength in me, I pushed him off and stepped away from him.
His face was laced with disappointment and sadness as he stared at me.
"You think you could get whoever you want just by flirting with them? Are you ever serious with anything?" I didn't know why my eyes were suddenly watery, and soon tears dropped down my cheeks.
"Open my legs for you and allow you to fuck me, and then what? Count me as a new body count?" I sneered at him, more tears streamed down my cheeks. I desperately wanted to give him a chance to take my body, but I was scared... Scared of being counted as a new body count to him, I was scared of having just a one-time thing with him. He doesn't fuck the same pussy twice, so what was the point of it?
"Janice..."
"I won't ever allow that, Connor... I won't ever be one of your victims," I shook my head, and he scoffed and sighed.
"Yes... I... I love you... I fucking desperately love you with everything in me... I didn't know how it happened or when it did. If I knew how and when, I wouldn't have allowed myself to fall for someone like you..." I wiped my tears with the back of my palm, but more kept coming, so I allowed it.
"You were the last person I would allow myself to fall for if I had control over my heart... Leave me the hell alone and let me get over this feeling, ok?"
"Why do you want to get over it?" He took a step close to me, his eyes not leaving mine.
"Is that even a question?" I scoffed unbelievably.
"Because I'm not worthy of your love?" He asked disappointedly.
"Because you won't ever reciprocate the feeling! The only thing you want is sex..."
"And you think I won't get it out there if that's what I want, huh? Thousands of women out there would go on their knees and fucking worship my cock. I could sleep with any woman out there because they are dying to have me. Do you think that's what I want?" He huffed again, and I raised my eyebrows.
"Are you this fucking clueless or are you pretending not to see how much you've driven me crazy? Are you pretending not to see that I'm dying here because I'm desperately in love with you?" His voice was a bit high-pitched, filled with sincerity, and his eyes conveyed nothing but the sincerity of how he felt, although I've doubted him before, I knew he was telling the truth. I froze on the spot, my jaw dropped as I stared back at him. Slowly, my heartbeat slowed down until I could barely feel it, and when I least expected it, I felt it thumping slowly, but so hard that I thought it was going to explode. Did Connor just confess to me?
"Hu... huh?"
"I love you, Janice... With every drop of blood in me, with my whole entirety... I didn't know how or when this feeling started, but I know I don't ever want to let you go..." He paused and finally covered the distance between us, his eyes not leaving mine.
"I was scared, Janice... I was scared you'd be hurt... I didn't want to hurt you, but I can't take it anymore. I can't take the pain of seeing you smiling at another man... I can't bear to see another man making you smile anymore when I should be the only one behind your smiles..." He paused and slowly, his warm hand found its way to my cheek and cupped it, slowly caressing my cheek with his thumb.
"Henceforth... Let me be the only man you would smile with... The only one you would talk to... The only shoulder you would lean on. When you hit your lowest, let's hit it together, and when you reach your peak, let me by your side, cheering for you," Those words melted my heart, and seeing the sincerity in his eyes made my heart flutter. I didn't know how to feel. Connor just fucking confessed to me that he loves me, I didn't know whether I should scream out of excitement, dance, or hug him. I didn't know.
"Will you give me a chance to be with you?" He asked, his eyes demanding answers and I knew he was waiting for a positive answer.
"No... You can't mess with me, so get the fuck away from me!" I snapped and stepped away from him, and his face dropped. The hope he held high seemed to have been smashed with those words I said to him.
"I really love you, I swear it..."
"And you want me to believe that? You are a playboy, Connor. You don't do love. You are going to keep fucking around with women, so I can't trust someone like yourself with my heart. I'm going to get over my feelings for you, so you should deal with yours," I stated bluntly, and he bit his bottom lip.
"I understand how you feel, but I'm never going to give up. I'm going to win your heart and make you mine. I'm going to prove my love to you and make you see reason to not get rid of your feelings for me," His eyes glistened with tears as he said those words, and with that, he turned and started heading to the door.
"And who said you need to prove anything to me?" I spoke up, and he stopped then turned and faced me.
"I'm just kidding. I will give us a chance together," His mouth dropped as he stared at me unbelievably.
"How was that? Sweet, right? Well, that's my revenge for going out with Liana today," I winked at him, and he scoffed a warm smile laced up his lips.
"Come here," He pulled me into his arms and pecked my lips before pulling me into his arms, hugging me like his life depended on it. I guess we are a couple now, right?