Chapter 10

No matter how hard I tried, I could not bring myself to get out of bed and start a new day. 

A million strings of memories and questions crippled me, and their weight refused to let me stand up. 

Mom and Dad had both been in my room earlier, wondering if I was all right and why I was not going to the cafe today. I had made up an excuse of feeling unwell and they had bought it. The possibility of falling sick after having eaten something at the carnival last night was legible enough. 

However, Mom had seemed a little doubtful because of my puffed-up face and red, swollen eyes. She knew that I had been crying and she had tried to coax the reason out of me, but I had given her no answers. 

I was not ready to tell her what I had learnt last night. I had not gotten my own head wrapped around it yet. What was I going to tell her? 

I was currently alone in the house with only my thoughts left to fill the silence. Mom had gone out to run some errands and Dad had left for work. 

I had not gotten a wink of sleep last night. I could not understand how Jace could do something like this to me. I simply could not. 

He was dating Sierra. He was in love with Sierra. 

Every time that I thought I had cried to my heart's content and that there were no more tears left in me that could possibly be shed, the raw truth in front of me made me shrink more into my bed and scream into the pillow until a cascade of tears started to flow again. 

Sierra was my cousin and Stefan's younger sister. She was barely three months older than me and yet had terrorized me to my limits, all through my life. Unlike Stefan, she had diligently taken after Uncle David and Aunt Mellanie, maybe even surpassing them in mastering the art of wreaking havoc in my family. 

Sierra, too, went to boarding school abroad with Stefan. But, unlike Stefan, she did not come back to pursue her under graduation here. She had preferred to continue her studies abroad. However, she did come back to Emberhill during the holidays every year. 

There was not a single time that I could remember when Sierra was back in Emberhill, and my life had continued to proceed peacefully. 

I could not even begin to elaborate on all that she had done to me and my family up until now. A lifetime would fall short. 

She had chopped off the entire length of my hair when I was in fourth grade. For months, I had to go to school looking like as if a rat had bitten off my hair. At a family gathering, she had accused me of stealing her jewelry, in front of everybody. Once, she had almost gotten me arrested for 'threatening' to kill her, which was a complete lie. 

She had severely crushed my self-esteem on numerous occasions with her insults and taunts. She had humiliated my parents to the point that I had found my mom crying alone once. 

I despised Sierra and couldn't stand her even for a second. And Jace knew all this. He knew every single thing. He was always the first person that I used to run to whenever Sierra did something to me. 

Sierra and Jace had never met each other, either through me or in front of me. Whenever I was forced to be in the presence of Sierra, like during family celebrations and dinners, Jace was not present there.

And whenever Sierra was in Emberhill for the holidays, Jace and I always met at his house, never at mine. I knew there was a chance that Sierra could drop into my house anytime. I could not take the risk of her ever finding out about Jace. I was sure that just like she had destroyed everything that I cherished, she would find a way to spoil our friendship too. So Jace and I were careful and secretive. 

Four years ago, when Jace had simply stood up and left after I had confessed my love for him, without turning around even once, and then left Emberhill altogether, leaving me confused and hurt and abandoning our friendship, there was still no clarity regarding where we stood. Our friendship was hanging in the air.

If I pushed all the rationality and emotions aside and thought clearly about his actions, then maybe I could begin to try and understand his actions. 

But the fact that after breaking my heart so ruthlessly and tossing any respect for our friendship into the trash, he had gone on and begun a relationship with Sierra… I could never fathom this. I could never understand, and I could never forgive. 

He knew everything about Sierra. He knew about everything that she had done to me and yet he had thought that it would be totally fine to date her. 

For years and years together, literally our entire life, we had been joined at the hip. We had shared every single joy and sorrow, seen each other at their best and worst, kept promises and protected the deepest of secrets. We knew each other in and out. We were closer than any meaning of best friends that could be described. We trusted each other. 

And yet, Jace had betrayed me. 

I had thought that him rejecting me could not get any worse. I had thought that there was no bigger heartbreak than our broken friendship. But I had been wrong. This truth had rattled every single one of my senses. 

I was still not able to believe it. I had to blink several times, at different moments, to realize that I was not in a nightmare. This was reality. A reality in which Jace and Sierra were a couple. 

Jace and Sierra. 

It even sounded horrible, like something that was never meant to be. 

Why? Why had Jace chosen Sierra? Why out of all girls?

Why over me? 

He knew that it was the same Sierra. He knew the surname. He had seen the photos that I used to show him. He knew. He knew bloody everything. 

How could he? How could he do this to me?