Chapter 126
Levi and the others kept drinking. Seeing how much fun they were having, I wanted to join in, but they all refused.
After the New Year's fireworks, Nola and the others said they wanted to go home. I wanted them to stay over at my place, but they insisted on leaving.
Thinking back to how Levi bought all those "stars" and brought them home, I was still deeply touched. If this was his way of showing love, it was quite impressive.
I sat in the living room, staring up at the second floor for a long time. In Levi's words, both subtle and somewhat direct, did he really love me?
If so, would he ever waver?
We were about to enter our seventh year of marriage. They say the seven-year itch is real. Jessa's appearance had terrified me. I had decided several times to divorce him, but now I found myself loving him more and more.
When it came to loving him, I could be impressive too. I felt that no one in this world loved him more than I did.
But the more I loved, the more I feared losing him, just like fireworks - brilliant but fleeting.
I was afraid that one day he might find someone new, and my personality was strange - when I feared losing something, I tended to give up first.
"Mrs. Morgan, why aren't you resting yet?"
Indigo probably came out to clean up. She didn't like leaving things for tomorrow. She glanced toward the dining room and thoughtfully poured me a glass of water.
"You must have eaten something cold. Drink some hot water."
Holding the cup, warmth spread from my palms throughout my body.
"Where's Mr. Morgan?"
"He went back to the room."
Indigo pointed at the clock on the wall. "It's past one in the morning. You should rest early, too. You can sleep in tomorrow, it's still the holidays."
"Okay."
"I'll go clean up then."
I stopped her. "Indigo, clean up tomorrow. It's too late, go rest."
"Mrs. Morgan, you always think of others. You should think about yourself more. You don't need to hold back your emotions. Enjoy first - it's not always a bad thing."
Her words seemed to enlighten me. I suddenly felt much clearer. If I kept imagining bad things happening, I would never be able to enjoy the moment.
"Good night."
I smiled and said good night to her. Since I didn't know what tomorrow would bring, I might as well stop overthinking.
"Good night."
I returned to the room. Levi was already asleep. After drinking so much, he would fall asleep easily.
After washing up, I lay down carefully, afraid of waking him.
As soon as I adjusted my pillow, Levi turned over and naturally wrapped his arms around me. My whole body froze, not daring to move.
"Why are you just getting back?"
Levi wasn't asleep? My heart pounded.
He seemed to sense my nervousness and gently stroked my belly. "Eat less cold things like ice cream next time."
"I didn't..."
"You two were having such a great time eating it."
Nola and I did eat ice cream, and we were indeed happy. After eating it, my stomach felt uncomfortable, and I'd been gritting my teeth to bear it.
"Don't move."
Levi's hand rubbed back and forth, trying to warm my belly. Gradually, his hand began to wander, and my heart beat even harder.
I felt the heat from his chest, as if it would melt me.
He pulled me closer into his arms. My brain was about to short-circuit.
Suddenly, I remembered - I hadn't had my period in a long time. I'd been too busy lately, and there had been all sorts of messy things at home...
I thought carefully. If there was one, it should have been after that time I got drunk...
I immediately grabbed his hand and held it at my waist.
He stopped, but two seconds later, his hand continued to wander. Maybe he thought I was playing hard to get?
I wanted to speak, but the words stuck in my throat and wouldn't come out.
I wasn't sure if my missed period was due to a hormonal imbalance or pregnancy, so I couldn't directly tell him my concerns.
"Not okay?"
There was disappointment in Levi's tone. He must have sensed that I was moved, too, but passion that stopped abruptly could be frustrating.
"Yeah."
I reluctantly refused. I wanted to wait until I found out tomorrow, then explain.
His hand slowly withdrew. "Sleep then."
His tone was flat. This time, I couldn't detect his emotions.
He turned over, his back to me.
I turned around and reached out to hug him.
His body stiffened. I hugged him tighter. I didn't speak. I thought he should understand what I meant.
After all, if he didn't initiate, I had never actively been intimate with him before.
I had gathered the courage to hug him. He should at least understand my feelings, right?
After a long while, I heard his soft snoring.
He had fallen asleep, but my thoughts were exceptionally clear.
I was really too careless. How could I have overlooked my period?
I let go of him, turned over, and picked up my phone, adjusting the brightness to the lowest setting.
I tried hard to recall the date of my last period. It had been over two months...
If I were really pregnant, would it be a boy or a girl? Did Levi like boys? He loved Celestia so much, he would happily accept a second child, right?
But if I really were pregnant, what about my thriving company? Nola was married, too. I couldn't keep sacrificing her time.
The company was doing well and needed more of my energy, but pregnancy would affect everything. Could I really manage both?
Although Jessa and Levi had separated, who could guarantee there wouldn't be other women who liked Levi? How would I deal with that then? So being pregnant would be a burden, right?
It felt like postpartum depression emotions were coming back. I couldn't help but think about many things.
I started looking up pregnancy symptoms. I had been so confused during the last pregnancy that I'd almost forgotten. Drowsiness fit perfectly - I dozed off whenever I had a bit of free time.
Childbirth seemed really painful. I remembered almost tearing the sheets. I hadn't even dared let Levi be there for the delivery. Back then, he didn't accept me.
This time, if I were pregnant and decided to have the baby, would he be with me?
Before I knew it, it was 3 AM. I touched my belly, feeling a mix of emotions. Drowsiness grew stronger; my eyes felt sore. I ordered myself to sleep. Everything else would become clear tomorrow.
Before sleeping, I made an appointment with a doctor to go to the hospital tomorrow for a checkup. If my guess were true, then I would decide carefully.
I turned off my phone. Everything fell into darkness. Closing my eyes, the image of the warehouse full of stars floated into my mind.
I had been so curious. Using the excuse of getting some air, I secretly went to see the warehouse. Nola's description had been too conservative. The scene was spectacular.
Levi loved stars, and he loved only me, right?
I silently repeated in my heart, 'I truly love only you...'