Chapter 141: The Interrupted Melody

I wanted to keep my mouth tightly shut, but I was sure Kenn would not stop pressing until I explained everything. If only explaining it were as easy as I imagined, perhaps I would not be this anxious.

"Why are you silent? Say something," Kenn urged in a low demanding voice.

I opened my mouth to answer, then closed it again because I had difficulty arranging the words.

"I want ...," I took a deep breath, "us to end this relationship that hasn't even begun, Kenn."

"What do you mean?" Kenn asked with a furrowed brow. "Did I make a mistake that I didn't realize?"

"No. You didn't do anything wrong. I just want us not to meet anymore. There will be no relationship at all," I said in a slightly raised tone.

His body stiffened. The grip of his hands on my waist tightened as well. I was sure he was very surprised, or perhaps hurt by my words.

"You think ending something is that easy?" he whispered, his breath warm yet hurried near my face. "Why?" His expression hardened. "Give me one reason why I should follow your wish."

Slowly, my hands moved down and stopped on his chest. My fingers clenched stiffly. I looked up, staring into the depth of his eyes. He only remained silent and returned my gaze.

"Stop looking at me like that, Kenn. You're making everything more difficult," I murmured softly. "I think the reason that I already have a boyfriend is strong enough for you to stay away from me, Kenn," I said, then lowered my gaze.

I felt his fingers touch my chin, lifting it so that I looked at him again. Kenn stared at me without saying a single word. His eyes were investigating, as if searching for a lie on my face.

"A boyfriend? Who? Kevan?" Kenn laughed cynically.

Sometimes I think Kenn can see inside me and tell when I am lying. Like now, my eyes moved restlessly because I was afraid he would succeed in reading my mind.

"Look at me and tell the truth. Do you love me or Kevan?" His cold face appeared again. "Say the name if you are truly sure about your feelings."

Strengthening my resolve, I gathered all the remaining strength I had left. I raised my gaze and tried to put on the calmest face possible while swallowing with difficulty.

"Kevan."

"Say it clearly! Don't just mumble!" His eyes still did not change. Cold and flat, yet as if hiding a wound inside.

My eyes felt hot. I felt these tears already pressing to come out. I closed my eyes tightly. For God's sake, don't cry now.

"You want to hear it again? Fine," I challenged with the remaining courage I had.

Once again, I struggled not to look weak. I looked at him arrogantly, not caring about my heart that was going crazy or my heart that was shattering into pieces.

"I'll repeat it, Kenn. I never had any feelings for you. I love Kevan. Not you!"

"So, everything that happened between us was just nonsense to you?" Kenn's voice lowered, almost like a growl.

"Yes. None of it meant anything," I lied, even though my tongue felt numb.

Suddenly he stepped back away from me. His face hardened and the muscles of his jaw looked tense. He stopped a few steps away from me, still staring at me while putting both hands into his trouser pockets.

"If you still remember, actually from the beginning I had already chosen to stay away from you. But you kept coming and opened that chance again," he said sharply.

I gripped both sides of my uniform skirt. I must not cry.

"It was your choice to come back, not my fault," I replied cruelly.

"Right. I'm stupid for having believed that there was something real here," he retorted with a tone of self-contempt.

"Fine. This time, I will also fulfill all your wishes. After this, we don't need to have any contact anymore." He seemed to swallow and tighten his jaw. "Just assume we never knew each other. Just assume I never existed in your life."

My body froze. My heart felt as if it had stopped beating. My body suddenly weakened and my breath felt tight, as if an invisible spear had pierced right through my heart.

"That's the best for both of us," I replied softly, almost inaudible.

For a moment, I could still catch his gaze that was full of hurt and disappointment before he chose to leave, leaving me alone in this room.

I knew everything was over now. Kenn followed my wish. He left carrying the series of words I had said that managed to hurt his feelings.

Unconsciously, my body slid down to the floor. I covered my face with my hands and cried uncontrollably. My shoulders shook violently holding back the suffocating sobs. I hit my chest, ordering these tears to stop flowing. But everything was useless. The sadness only gnawed at me even more.

"Forgive me, Kenn ... forgive me," I sobbed in the silence of the room.

Yes, I finally chose to let Kenn go.

This is the right decision, isn't it? But why does it hurt this much? Why won't my tears stop flowing?

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