Chapter 22

But when he turned his back on the window and the busy streets, he saw his lover in deep conversation with a blonde. She wore a pretty red dress that hugged her curves in a conservative way, and her hair was swept up in an elegant chignon, revealing a long, delicate neck. Her manicured hand rested on Mick’s forearm, and he listened intently to whatever she said. A few feet away, his boss regarded them with a smile, nodding in approval.

Elliot wanted to scream. He understood this was the reason for Mick’s reluctance to introduce him as his partner, that his life at the firm would become difficult if his boss found out he was gay. But Elliot needed more. His coming-out process had been painful, to say the least, and he resented being shoved back into the closet.

The blonde took a step closer, and Mick’s back stiffened. His smile lost some of its genuineness, but she didn’t seem to notice. Maybe it was only apparent to Elliot, who’d spent hours mesmerized by the way Mick’s mouth quirked up more on the left side, and how it curved down the tiniest bit in the right corner, giving his smile almost a question-mark shape.

But even though Mick was blatantly uncomfortable, he didn’t attempt to step away. Just like that, Elliot knew he had to get out of there before he caused a scene or said something he’d regret later. Despite his unhappiness with Mick’s actions, he didn’t want to screw up his lover’s life.

He put the eggnog on a small marble-top side table with gilded legs. He wrinkled his nose and tapped his lower lip with his index finger, knowing his lover wouldn’t be happy about him leaving. In the end, he decided to just get out and text Mick later.

He made it all the way to the door without anyone noticing him, as if he were invisible to the bigwigs attending the party.

Immediately after stepping out on the sidewalk, he managed to flag down a taxi. As he sat in the back of the car, watching the chaos of the city whiz past the window, he started to question his decision. Mick would be understandably upset, something he could have avoided if he’d acted like a responsible adult and let his partner know he was leaving

“Shit,” he muttered. He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and middle finger so hard, he made tiny flashes appear in his sight. Being reduced to a friend, despite Mick’s repeated promises to tell the truth, stung more than Elliot wanted to admit.

He’d suggested Mick attend the Christmas party by himself to avoid awkward introductions, but Mick had been adamant.

“I want you by my side,” he’d said and silenced all objections with wet, open-mouthed kisses until Elliot had surrendered and agreed to come.

Why hadn’t Mick taken the out Elliot had offered? Would he ever acknowledge their relationship officially? They’d been together for almost two years and recently started talking about moving in together. How would that work if Mick couldn’t admit his sexuality?

Elliot shook his head and forced back the guilt. Yes, it was petty to leave without saying goodbye, but he couldn’t go on being Mick’s dirty little secret. Something needed to change.

* * * *

Elliot only had time to kick off his shoes at home before his phone went off. He leaned his back against the door with a deep sigh, pulled out the phone, and answered without looking at the display. He knew who the caller was.

“Yeah?”

“Elliot? Where are you?” Mick spoke in a hushed tone, and Elliot could hear other voices in the background, letting him know Mick wasn’t alone.

“I went home.” He squeezed his eyes shut and slid down the wall until his ass hit the floor

“What? Why?” The irritation crept into Mick’s voice, even though Elliot doubted anyone else would recognize it.

“Why do you think?” Elliot didn’t want to do this over the phone, but he guessed he only had himself to blame since he hadn’t texted Mick immediately after leaving. But he still wasn’t in the mood to make it easy.

“I’ll call you back in a minute,” Mick said after a moment’s silence.

The line went dead and Elliot considered getting off the floor. Instead, he put the phone down next to him and started unbuttoning the peacoat. He had managed to struggle out of it when the phone rang again.

“Hello?” No response. “Mick?”

“I’m sorry.” The words were low and full of misery.

“Aw, shit, honey.” Elliot groaned and doubled over, feeling like someone punched him in the gut. He rested his forehead against his knees.

“I wanted to tell them. I did. But…” Mick’s voice trailed off.