Chapter 64: Love boat

She didn't have a right to listen in, Irin thought, but her curiosity got the better of her. With everything that was happening around them, it was good to be cautious.

"Did your journey go well?" the captain asked whoever he was talking to.

"I don't want to talk about that," someone answered. Was there a smaller boat tied to the ship? Was that where the voice was coming from? The captain's back was turned towards her, so she sneaked up to the railing and looked over it. What she saw stunned her. A net was hanging over the side of the ship, and using it as a hammock was a merman. He looked relaxed as he talked to the captain. Then she saw a look they shared and everything fell into place for her, and her heart broke for them. Irin turned around to check if Koth had noticed the same thing she had. He was slumped against the railing, sleeping.

"I'm guessing you heard it all?" Irin turned back and saw Captain Hanook stood in front of her. She registered that the merman was gone.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to snoop. I was just getting some water and got curious about who you were talking with. I didn't hear more than a sentence or two. I'm really sorry," she told him. He sighed and shook his head.

"We shouldn't meet like this; I know it's not a good idea. It's risky," he told her. "So, now you know. Would you like to make your judgement?" he asked.

"Judgement?" Irin asked, confused. "Oh, that you are in love with a man? I don't mind. Love is love," she told him, and gave him a smile. He looked a little strangely at her.

"I was more thinking about the merman thing," he told her.

"Oh." She looked back over her shoulder and saw that the captain followed her gaze. Koth was still asleep. "Half orc," she told him and smiled again.

"Right," the captain said, and returned her smile.

"So that is the reason you travel the sea?" she asked.

"It is," he agreed. "Nalu saved me from drowning years ago. I was thirteen, but I knew that there would be no one else in my heart. I joined my first crew a month later. It didn't take Nalu long to find me, and we have stayed in contact since then."

"That is sweet," Irin said. They had both relaxed against the railing. Captain Hanook shrugged.

"Life is cruel in some ways. I can't live in his world, he can't live in mine. We both know how we feel, but we can't act on it," he told her. He was looking out over the sea, as if it held the answer.

"I'm so sorry, captain. Is there something I can do?" Irin asked and placed her hand on his arm.

"No, I don't think there is anything anyone can do. The best thing for both of us would be for me to be strong enough to stay on land. Find a nice house, a kind husband and settle down. It would give us both freedom. But I can't. Every time I try, my heart and soul calls me back, just as Nalu can't bring himself to go on his people's mating journey to find a mate. I wouldn't even blame him if he did. I want him to be happy." Irin had to look away as her eyes filled with tears.

"It's just so utterly sad and heart-wrenching," she said. The captain laughed, a dry laugh devoid of all joy.

"It is," he agreed. "Thank you for letting me share my burdens with you."

"I'm honoured. Your crew don't know?" she asked.

"No. Not everyone is as open minded as you are. Mermaids and mermen are seen as dangerous; they have an unfair reputation. Kind of like orcs, I guess," he said and they both glanced toward Koth. "Let me help you to get him below deck," he then offered.

"Thank you. I can do it on my own, but I would appreciate help with opening the doors," she said.

"You?" he asked, looking her up and down. She giggled.

"Magic, you know," she told him. He laughed.

"I forget that small thing. You look too dainty," he said as they walked over to Koth. Irin said a prayer and Koth levitated in the air, his toes just dragging on the deck. She gently took his hand and walked forward, him floating slightly behind. He was really out of it. The captain made sure the doors were open for her to take Koth through. When she had put him on the bed, she didn't dare to try and get him into the hammock, she turned to the captain.

"You have told me one of your secrets, so I think it's only fair you get to know one of mine. Koth and I aren't really married," she told him. The captain's eyes grew big.

"You have to be the most convincing actors I have ever seen," he said. "You had me convinced that you were a couple."

"I didn't say we aren't a couple. We are just not married. We started our journey as close to strangers. Then we became friends and developed feelings, but before we could explore those, we told the lie about us being married. The road is not always safe, and it's not always accepted for a man and a woman to travel alone," she explained.

"You did it for your protection," he said with understanding.

"Yes. It wasn't always easy for Koth. Looking back I can see how complicated we made it. We were both trying to protect our hearts and each other. But we found our way to each other in the end."

"So why not get married?" he asked. Irin blushed.

"There hasn't been time, and he hasn't asked," she said.

"Have you?"

"No," she confessed.

"Don't rush into things. Take your time. Maybe not as much time as I have wasted, but still. And in a couple of years when you have taken the big step and have a little one, you will come and see me and show me that you are happy. Sometimes I need a little help to remember that there is happiness in the world," the captain told her. Irin liked the idea, and she nodded. She gave him a hug, as it felt right. She could feel how shocked he was by the way he stiffened. Then he relaxed and returned the hug.

"Now get some sleep. You have a day left on my ship. We have made good time and will be arriving in the Capital the morning after tomorrow." He left her alone with a sleeping Koth. The sea was calmer than it had been in days, and Irin chanced to join him on the bed. She missed sleeping with his arms around her.

"Irin?" he mumbled as he felt her making herself comfortable.

"No, it's Captain Hanook," she whispered.

"Liar, the captain isn't this soft," he said, pulling her closer. She smiled and kissed him.

"Go back to sleep," she told him.