"His name is vodka, you're gonna love him, you two go way back" he grins, and I squint at my phone, flipping it off. Bribery now too? He's on a roll tonight the prick. He knows my relationship with vodka, it's the only reason he has that fucking video. "Fine. I'll go" I concede, looking to Gizmo who is watching me intently with a puddle of drool forming on the floor near his mouth. "Brilliant! I'm on my way!" Frankie says brightly. I crease my brows "But you didn't know if I was-" "Sorry! Can't talk! Driving! See you in thirty minutes sweet cheeks!" he says loudly, trying to sound distracted and hangs up before I can reply. I just stare at my phone, blinking slowly. That sly fucking... I look at Gizmo again, who has rolled back onto his stomach, staring up at me with big dopey eyes as he snorts trying to inhale too quickly while his jowls smush against the floor and his tongue pokes out the front of his mouth, before he manages to suck it back in. I groan, leaning my palms on the counter as I hang my head "How do I always get dragged into shit like this by that annoying loveable twat?" ~•~ I've managed to look partially human, at least I don't look homeless - that's new. I stare in the mirror in my room, letting out a heavy breath as I press my lips together and look over my jeans and vintage distressed t-shirt, glancing down to my boots and back to my face. I mean, if a shirt is older than you are, and has holes in it but you refuse to throw it out because it's one of your favourite bands - you can get away with calling it distressed and vintage right? This is as party ready as I can manage, at least I brushed my hair. Maybe I can say I'm going for that rockstar without a care look? Just you know, without the fame, talent, looks or money. That works. I stare at my eyes briefly, barely recognising them. For how full they should be from all the things that they've seen it's a wonder they look so vacant, but I can't remember seeing them look any other way these days. I lean over to the reach next to my mirror grabbing another layer of clothing, pulling my red flannel on, and running my fingers through my long brown hair, before pressing my hands to my face and trying to coax myself into not feeling the amount of dread I do about going to this fucking party. It's so bizarre to think I actually use to enjoy going out, that I wanted to make friends years ago - I was bright, funny and somewhat confident but these days everything just seems grey, and like its too much effort. But I suppose when you have everything you cared about and your life flipped upside down, also kicked in the teeth, betrayed by everyone you trusted within three months, it might be the final straw for anyone when life hasn't been kind to you to begin with any way. I just don't really see the point if I'm being honest, getting up every day just seems like walking to a toaster and sticking a fork in it, listening to everyone else tell you how great it is, because their toaster isn't turned on and they aren't having their insides fried. I have Gizmo though, he's all the reason I need to get out of bed and deal with that every day. Speaking of that ball of dough with fur, he is sitting there staring up at me, whining as I shove my phone in my back pocket. "Don't give me that look Gizzy, I tried okay? This is as good as it gets, I don't need your attitude too" I say, gesturing to my outfit and he just cocks his head and huffs. "You'll be fine here for a couple hours, I left you extra food and new toys" I try and reason with him, crouching down to hold his wrinkly giant boof head "Just for the love of Christ, please don't try and eat the couch while I'm gone, not again" "Still talking to yourself I see" Frankie's voice scares the absolute shit out of me from my bedroom door way and I scream, flying backwards and landing on my back with a thud. "Have you heard of fucking knocking you creeping Jesus!" I gripe, pushing myself up on my elbows to glare at him. "You didnt give me a spare key so I wouldn't use it" he shrugs, trying to hold in a laugh as he leans against the door frame. Actually I gave you that key for a completely different reason Frankie and you know it, you turd. "I wasn't talking to myself" I huff, deciding to change the subject and pulling myself to my feet. "You're either talking to yourself or the dog - basically the same thing" he points out, looking over my outfit and giving me a smug grin. "You look smokin' by the way, but you always do" I frown at him, giving him a look that says he's full of shit. He always says things like that to me, and I know he's just trying to build my confidence but I know I look like a permanently tired pigeon, I don't need smoke blown up my ass about it. "Can we please just go so I can get home?" I ask, before leaning down to press a kiss to the top of Gizmos head which he only snorts at again, before standing and waddling over to his pile of pillows in my room and flopping on them. I swear all he does is eat and sleep, when he's not trying to give me a nervous break down using my phone that I can't afford to replace as a snack. It's the third one this year. Frankie steps aside to let me pass him as I walk out of my room, and he waves to Gizmo warmly before turning to follow me. "Damn calm down party animal, I know you're excited but I don't think I can handle all of this enthusiasm" he dead pans. "I'm being bribed and blackmailed to go to this, may I remind you" I point out, grabbing my keys off the table and Alex's birthday present. Even though I was trying to avoid the social situation, I'd had this present picked out for him for weeks - as much as I avoid connections with people and my feelings, I'm a sentimental piece of crap and I really hope he likes what I had made for him. It's special, just like he is, Frankie too. Frankie doesn't reply and I see him staring at the bedroom door down the hall from my kitchen, and looking back to me with a sympathetic smile "How was it today? You okay?" "Just like every other day" I dismiss, not wanting to talk about it. Frankie is really the only person I've let into that part of my life, well, since everyone I thought I mattered to took a flaming dump on it and even though it's hard for me to show it, I know he knows I appreciate him trying to be there for me, he knows how hard it is for me to let anyone in. "You're normally not this down, are you sure you're okay? I've barely gotten that sense of humour of yours from you all day" he presses as he follows me towards the front door, sounding sincere but I don't miss the concern in his voice. "I'm fine Frankie" I sigh, opening the front door as we walk through it, and I lock it behind me "It really was just like every other day, I'm just tired" I'm always tired. He slings his arm over my shoulder as we walk towards his car, giving me that enthusiastic grin I know so well, that always seems to manage to lift my mood whether I like it or not. "Well we're having fun tonight, even if I have to give you liver poisoning with alcohol to drag it out of you" I smile "Awe damaging my vital organs to make sure I have a good time, that's so sweet" I coo at him, holding my hand over my heart. He shrugs, waggling his annoying full perfect brows at me "What else are friends for? Let's get wrecked baby cakes"