Chapter 36

**Chapter 37**

**Kent's POV**

There's a weight on my arm, and it's lightly snoring. My eyes are closed, and I debate whether to open them to see where I am or just play it off and pretend I'm asleep until she wakes up, or I leave and pretend I was never here.

The flashbacks from last night hit me like a bull. I passed out during that. I was embarrassed and wasn't about to talk to Lilith about it this early.

I gently remove her hands from around me, trying not to disturb her as I leave the room as quietly as possible.

I turn back, looking at her lithe body in the sheets.

*What are you doing to me?* I muttered, my voice barely a whisper as I gazed at her.

I leave the room, hoping no servants see me and hoping Lilith doesn’t notice I’ve gone.

I turn away from Lilith’s door, taking a deep breath.

“Good day, sir.” My body tenses as I turn toward the servant in front of me.

“Good day.” She looks at me and then back at the door, which everyone knew was Lilith’s chambers.

A strange look passes over her face as she glances at the door again, then back at me.

“Is anything the matter?” I asked her, trying to sound unbothered, though I could feel the anxiety rising.

“Not at all, my Lord. It is a fine day.” She walked away, her eyes twinkling with amusement as she glanced back at me.

A deep breath leaves me as I walk to my chambers to take my bath, trying to shake off the strange feeling that had settled in my chest.

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Breakfast time arrives, and Lilith still isn’t here. I feel both disappointed and relieved. I want to see her, but I can’t bear the thought of facing her after yesterday’s mishap.

I hear the sound of footsteps clacking down the hallway. My heart speeds up. Lilith is coming.

“Kent, good morning,” she says in a small voice as she sits at the far end of the table.

“Oh, Lilith, you’re awake.”

“I am. Did you wish for me not to wake?” She stares intently at her empty plate, not looking at me.

“I would never.” My face turns hot at her words.

“But you saw fit to leave me alone this morning—” I let out a loud cough, cutting her words short.

“I… Let's not talk about that right now.”

I stood up too quickly, casting a quick glance at her. “I’ll see you later.”

I step out of the manor, heading toward my carriage.

“Kent!” A voice calls after me.

I turn slowly to see a red-faced Lilith, who looks really annoyed. I walk toward the garden, settling into one of the chairs.

“Please leave me alone, Lilith,” I murmur, not wanting to deal with this right now.

“Why? Are you embarrassed by the idea of being with me?” She finally looks up at me, her brows slanted in defiance. She sits down in the chair farthest from me.

“That’s not the case.”

“Then?”

“Please, let’s not talk about that right now.”

“We will. I insist.”

“Lilith.”

“Do you know how I felt this morning when I looked over to the other side and saw no one there? The bed was cold and made, as if everything that happened yesterday was just a figment of my imagination.”

“Lilith…”

“You couldn’t leave a note or even wake me. You couldn’t even look me in the eye. Do I really embarrass you?” Her words pierce through me, and I finally look at her, seeing the hurt in her eyes.

“No, Lilith. You’ve got it all wrong.”

“I’m sitting here. Make me get it right.”

“I left not because you embarrassed me, but because I embarrassed myself.” My head hangs low, my face burning with shame.

Her chair scrapes loudly on the floor as she stands and walks around to my side.

Her shoes click against the floor as she settles down in the chair next to me.

“How so?” she asks, her voice soft but determined.

“I fainted when all that was happening, and you had to carry me up all those stairs by yourself.”

“Oh, that.” Her voice softens as she recalls the moment. “Is that why you’ve been avoiding me? Because you’re embarrassed?”

“To say it plainly, yes.” I look at Lilith, finally meeting her gaze.

Her head tilts back, and she bursts into laughter, covering her mouth with her hand as her shoulders shake.

“Kent, you need to go be embarrassed,” she says, still laughing. “You just wanted to go to sleep, and that’s presumably softer. It’s alright.” Lilith blushes as she recalls the events from the night before.

I look at Lilith in alarm. She thought I wanted to take a nap? She doesn’t know what was about to happen. I had almost—well, it’s best not to think about that now.

I stand quickly, bowing slightly. “I duly apologize for my indecency yesterday. I can assure you it won’t happen again. I am not in any position to do anything unsightly to your body.”

“What if I want it to happen again?” she asks, her voice low, and her eyes suddenly intense.

Silence stretches between us as we look at each other, sparks crackling in the air.

“Did you sleep well?” I ask her, desperately trying to change the subject, to get control over the situation.

“Yes, I did. And I hope you did too.”

“The best in a long time.” An awkward silence hangs in the air as she looks at me, her gaze lingering just a little too long.

My lips thinned as I wondered why I said that. What was it about her that made me so unable to control myself?

“Well, I guess I better not waste your time,” I say, standing. She passes me, heading back toward the main house.

I close my eyes, inhaling deeply. Her sweet scent lingers in the air, and my chest tightens as I remember how delectable she looked and smelled last night.

“Kent?” she says, breaking me from my reverie.

“Is anything the matter?” she asks again, her voice full of concern.

“Not at all,” I answer, my voice coming out colder than I intended.

“Lest I forget, my friend will be coming today for tea. Do you remember him?”

“Oh,” I say, the memory clicking into place. The one who is in love with Lilith. The one who she always greets with those warm smiles whenever they meet.

“We’re going to have a swell time. What time are you getting back? Do you want to join us for tea?”

“I’ll be a bit busy, but I’ll see if I can make it, hm?”

“Okay then.” Her voice drops a little, a strange, disappointed note creeping into her words.

An awkward silence follows.

“I guess I’ll see you later,” Lilith says, twisting her hands nervously.

I walk toward the carriage, stopping to glance back at her. “Goodbye.”

I climb into the carriage and watch as she disappears into the distance. My mind is a whirlwind of confusion, longing, and regret. I couldn’t shake the thought of Lilith, the way she looked at me, the way she made me feel. I don’t know where this is all headed, but I know I can’t run from it forever.

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