Chapter 223
"I'm sorry," I told him, looking down. He looked up to meet my eyes and gave me a sad smile, reaching over and putting his hand on mine. Any tears that had been on their way finally arrived in my eyes as Layla walked in.
"Hey guys-" she stopped herself and her smile fell when she saw our expressions. "Oh, sorry, did I walk in on a moment?"
"No, no, um," I took my hand from Jake's to run it through my hair, trying to keep myself together, "I actually have something we should talk about, though.. um," I couldn't bring myself to say it.
"It's bad?" Layla asked, and I looked up to see her slightly worried expression.
"Yeah.. see, I might, um," my voice shook, "this might effect our custody situation... they said I might, um, they said I could lose custody of you two," I finally got out, and when I looked back up at Layla, my heart fell apart. I had never seen her eyes so wide and so painfully shocked.
"No," she shook her head, and I swallowed the lump in my throat. "No. No no I am not going back," her voice shook, a tear already falling as she continued staring at me in disbelief, "I'm not fking going back there, I can't. I won't. No. I finally found you guys, and Jake- no way in hell can Jake go through what I went though. He can't. It took me four years to finally find a good family that didn't either treat me like shit or rejected me. Four years! I can't go back, Asmodeus, and Jake can't go with me," she pleaded, on the verge of falling apart. Tears built up my eyes as I watched her.
She never really talked about foster care outside of the occasional, light-hearted anecdotes she told. I never realized how truly traumatizing all those years had been for her.
I felt frozen in place as Carla and Jessica came in, Jessica immediately going to hold Layla as she slowly fell to the floor crying, and Carla watching Jake as he asked what I was talking about. I realized then that he didn't even know what the word custody meant, or why Layla was breaking down, but I didn't have the strength to tell him as I just watched Layla sob into Jessica, who was looking up at me confused- not knowing what happened and asking for an explanation with his eyes.
"I can't go back," she repeated herself and gripped Jessica's shirt in her fists as she cried into him. Then it finally clicked with Jessica what she had found out about. I looked up to Carla as she came over to me and Jake, taking our hands in hers and bringing us out of the room
"You should tell Jake later," she suggested quietly, and I nodded, my mind still somewhat elsewhere as I heard Layla's quiet yet intense crying still coming from inside the room. "I'll stay with him, you gotta shower and clean up before anything gets infected," she said, and I nodded again.
I watched as she took Jake with her to my room, and then I walked to the bathroom. It was pretty damn painful, and took sort of a long time for me to get myself showered and bandaged up. I had to call Carla in once to help me with my forearm.
By the time I was done, Layla had calmed down a bit and she was lying across Jessica's lap the couch. I didn't say anything to them about keeping a distance, wanting Layla to feel better in any way she could. Her eyes were closed against Jessica's chest, his arm around her, and he shook his head to me slightly- telling me that she wasn't doing too good. I just sadly nodded and went to my room.
Carla and Jake were sitting on my bed, and she was tossing pieces of popcorn at him which he would try to catch in his mouth- then he would do the same for her. It was nice to hear his little laugh again as she caught one in her mouth. They looked up at me when I walked in.
"Hey," Carla gave me a small smile, and I forced one onto my face in return. My bed was covered in random pieces of popcorn, but I couldn't care less.
A few moments later, Jake got up to use the bathroom, and Carla turned to me.
"So," she started, and I popped another piece of popcorn in my mouth, "there's something that I feel like I really need to do- and before you freak out, this is the perfect opportunity to do so because he can't do anything and there isn't really a safer place for me to do so," she paused, and I furrowed my brows. "I'm gonna visit Milo in the hospital and make him fear for his life just a little bit more."