Chapter 15

Driving back home I kept glancing at the box of doughnuts in the passenger’s seat. I cursed myself for being so bad at putting my emotions into words. I had been unable to convey to Hana how touched I was by her gift. She had told me it wasn’t much, but it was. She had made these doughnuts herself, for me. She had taken the time to think about what I would like and then to make it. It showed how sweet and thoughtful she was. I looked at them again as I got home and placed the box on the counter in the kitchen. They looked like pieces of art, like something that should be placed in prominent places and admired. I looked at them and thought about the cookies and the cinnamon buns I had eaten earlier. I thought about Hana’s dream of opening a small bakery, the location where I first had bumped into her and I knew that if she had opened the bakery she would have been an instant success. She had what it took to succeed. And the gravity of her loss hit me like a ton of bricks. Because of Simon she wouldn’t have that, and it sent feelings of hurt and anger through me. I wanted to go to where he was held up and knock some sense into him. Before I did something stupid my more reasonable part told me to think of something else. The image of the stray blob of icing on the side of Hannas mouth popped into my head. How it had looked like something else, how she had used her thumb to swipe it away and then she let the thumb into her mouth. The memory of her plump lips forming around it had me instantly hard. Just like I had got in her kitchen when I saw it the first time. Her sensual but unknowing act had me imagining her sucking on other things than her thumb.

“Fuck!” I said out loud to no one. I was no longer furious, but I was horny like a teenager in an adult book store. I needed a cold shower before I decided to go over to Hana’s and do something stupid. Like kissing her. I had been so close to kiss her in her kitchen, I thought as I got in the shower and turned it to cold. I shivered as I remembered her clear blue eyes looking up at me, how she had leaned into me. My hand closed around my stiff dick and I groaned as I began stroking it. Images of Hana flashed before my eyes. My hand moved faster and I needed to brace myself against the shower wall with my other hand. I wished she could be with me in the shower, that I could get to feel her naked skin in my hands. In my mind she got down on her knees in front of me, those brilliant eyes locked on me, and when the memory of her cleaning her thumb combined with my fantasy I shouted as I came and emptied myself against the tiles. My legs were shaking as I returned to reality. The cold water was making me shiver. I rinsed off as quickly as I could and made my way out into the kitchen. I grabbed one of each doughnut and headed for the couch. Turning on the show I had been watching yesterday I ate my treat. They were just as delicious as I had imagined. I resisted the urge to get the box and go wild. Even though I loved them, I couldn’t eat two dozen on my own. Not in one sitting. I grabbed my phone.

Me: Thank you for the doughnuts, they were amazing. I might be addicted.

I felt like a loser as I watched the phone, waiting for a reply. To my relief I saw the dancing dots just moments later.

H: Have you already eaten some? You should have dinner first, you know.

I smiled at the message.

Me: Chocolate, coffee, sugar and fruit. I think I covered all the major food groups.

Hana sent me a GIF of a kitten that looked like he was giggling. Adorable.

Me: Would you be terribly upset if I took some of the doughnuts into work with me and shared with my co-workers?

H: Of course not. I didn’t think you would finish off two dozen doughnuts on your own before they go bad.

Me: Thank you. Am I disturbing you in the middle of dinner?

H: No, I have just taken a short nap and am trying to decide what to eat.

Me: That is always the problem isn’t it?

We continued to text, talking about what foods we liked, what we liked to cook for food. In the middle of our conversation I strolled back into the kitchen to heat up the leftovers from the day before. I knew all this communication was a bad idea. I was already having graphic fantasies about Hana. I had been moments away from kissing her. I needed to create distance between us. It would be the right thing to do. But it was fucking addictive to talk to her. She made the evening go by in a flash and before I knew it I was saying good night to her and getting ready for bed myself.

The next morning I strolled into the office with my box full of doughnuts. Well, I might have eaten some of them. I had eaten eight of them, but there were still some left. I stopped at Claire’s desk and opened the lid.

“The ones with the marbled glaze are coffee cream and the other ones are cherry and chocolate,” I told her. She looked delighted as she took a cherry one.

“Thanks boss, what’s the occasion?” she asked before taking a bite. Her eyes grew big and she let out a surprised moan. I knew how she felt.

“No occasion. I got these as a thank you and thought I might as well spread the joy,” I told her as I walked into my office. Ten minutes later, as I was eating another doughnut and trying to figure out how much extra time I needed to spend training to work all of the extra calories off, Jason walked into my office.

“Claire said something about doughnuts,” he announced before greeting me.

“Hello to you too, and yes. Please help me eat them before I end up eating them all.”

“Moufufe, feef a ealy goof,” he said with his mouth stuffed.

“Yeah, they are amazing,” I agreed.

“Where did you get them?” he asked as he swallowed and was heading for another.

“Hana made them as a thank you for me helping her,” I told him.

“Do you think she will bring some tomorrow?” he asked. I hadn’t told him about paying off her rent for her, so Jason presumed she had thanked me for my help with the Simon situation. I was happy to keep it that way. If Jason knew about the rent money, he would have questions. Questions I didn’t want to answer.

“Who knows, one can only hope,” I said.

“If all our pro bono cases pay us in doughnuts like these, I think we can start taking on more of them.” We both laughed. “So, did she agree to it?” he then asked.

“She didn’t have much choice, but yes she did. She asked a lot of questions about how it would happen, I think she has a good grip on what to expect,” I said.

“Do you think she will be able to handle it?”

“I think so. She has some trauma responses from I don’t know where. But I think we can keep those to a minimum,” I thought out loud. Jason nodded.

“I asked Tommy to pull up the plans for the restaurant. Let’s take a look at them and then decide who we want as backup,” Jason suggested. I nodded. We took the box of doughnuts with us to the conference room and laid the floor plan we had got out on the table. Digital blueprints were fine and all, but sometimes nothing beats the old way. It took us most of the day to plan out the strategy, put together the team and then brief them. The doughnuts were just a memory when we finished for the day and I decided to go home earlier than usual. I was planning on hitting the gym I had at home. I could use the gym at work, we had a state of the art one. But I thought that I might text Hanna while I was working out. And I didn’t need any of my coworkers to see that big grin I always caught myself having when we texted. I got in the car and as I was about to pull out my phone buzzed. Hana had written me a message and I smiled. Until I opened it and read what it said. My blood froze and I stepped on the gas.

H: Someone just tried to grab me. I don’t know what to do.