Savior.
Fae freak.
Royal.
The labels this world threw at Brea were too much. She couldn’t handle the constant expectations, the gobs of information she still didn’t know.
And the kiss.
She lay in her bed, staring at the canopy overhead. Too many emotions to decipher rolled through her like waves, bringing her magic to a crest before it tumbled into her stomach, crashing in on itself.
Lochlan tricked her. The kiss was nothing more than him trying to stir up her emotions and get her power to explode out of her. He hadn’t done it again in the week they’d been training, but he used other tactics, talking about her family in Ohio and some of the things he’d witnessed. Embarrassment burned through her.
How many times had she told her mom there was someone watching her? On some level, she’d felt it and even seen him, claiming there was a boy with pointed ears and flashing eyes.
All that got her were multiple stays at the Clarkson Institute.
And he’d seen it all. Had he watched them strap her to a bed as she screamed she wasn’t lying?
Did he watch when her dad called her every name his drink-addled brain could conjure?
He thought he knew her because he spent all these years watching over her, but she wasn’t even sure she knew herself. She knew she should feel creeped out that her mom would send someone to spy on her, a teenager no less, but instead, she took an odd comfort in it. Even when she’d been locked away, she hadn’t been alone.
Lochlan wasn’t Griff, and maybe it was time for her to stop treating him like they had the same motives. One wanted to manipulate her while the other had devoted his life to keeping her safe.
Kicking off her covers, she sat up as Rowena entered the room carrying a tray that no doubt held Brea’s breakfast.
“Morning, Ro.”
Rowena set the tray on the table and placed her hands on her hips. “Ro? What have I told you about that silly nickname?”
“You know you love it.” Brea’s lips curled into a smile. “Or would you prefer Wena? Rowy? Lady Wen?”
“My name is Rowena, my lady.”
“Okay, no nicknames for you. Got it.” Brea snagged a pastry off the tray and wrapped Rowena in a hug. “Thanks for breakfast.”
Rowena stiffened. “My lady, this isn’t proper.”
Brea laughed. “So?” She released the uncomfortable maid and bounced toward her wardrobe. “I think I’ll get my Eldur Brew in the city this morning.” She hadn’t been into the city in the weeks since Lochlan and Finn returned. Maybe it was finally starting to master her magic or starting to trust this place, but she felt better than she had any day since coming to this world, and probably before.
She flung open the wardrobe doors and flipped through the dresses, wanting something simple. “Rowena, just for today, I’d like to forget about every bad thing that has happened.”
“Forgetting does not make it disappear, my Lady.”
“Yes, I know that. But I need to smile. Maybe even laugh. I want to have fun.” She looked back over her shoulder. “Does fun exist in the fae world?”
Rowena’s expression softened. “Yes, Lady Brea, though, it’s rare for royals in Eldur.”
“Ah, but I’m not an Eldur royal. This city only knows me as a Fargelsian princess.”
Rowena stepped to her side and pulled a simple yellow dress free. “This one.”
Brea smiled. “You’re right. It’s perfect.” Knowing Rowena wouldn’t care because of the odd fae lack of modesty, Brea shed her sleeping gown and slid the sheath dress over her head.
“Sit,” Rowena ordered, pointing to the stool in front of the vanity. “Now that you are a known princess, I cannot have you wandering into the city looking like any old commoner.” She ran a jeweled brush through Brea’s long hair before twisting it into a braid and wrapping it around the crown of her head. “And you are not to go alone. I don’t know how your mothers allowed it before.”
“They were a little preoccupied, Rowena.”
“Yes, well, we all miss Alona, but you’re their daughter too, and you deserve their full attention.”
Brea turned her smile on Rowena. She was the first person to voice what Brea had been feeling since arriving. Alona being abducted was a tragedy, but she wanted a place in this family too.
She thought back on Lochlan’s revelations, and her smile widened. “I have had their attention. My entire life they have cared.” That knowledge lifted a weight from her, freeing her from the abandonment she hadn’t even realized she’d felt.
Yes, Myles and Alona were still prisoners. Aunt Regan would still come after her if she ever left the safety of Raudur City.
Lochlan was still a frustrating enigma of a man.
But, just once, she wanted to be a young woman exploring a new world she’d found herself in. No worries, nothing to push her magic out of control.
It was her birthday present to herself, even though that day was past.
She belted the waist of the dress, much to Rowena’s dismay, and tied the pouch of coins her mom gave her to the belt. Slipping into her boots, she waved goodbye to Rowena and darted into the hall.
Getting into the city was about more than just having fun. She’d made friends there and was anxious to see them. But Rowena would have a fit if she didn’t find an escort.
Maybe Tierney would go with her. Changing direction, she headed toward the throne room. Her two moms were never far from each other’s sides. She figured the queen would have duties to attend to, but her wife might enjoy a trip.
The door stood partially open and arguing voices filtered out. Brea recognized Lochlan and Eamon Donovan immediately. She slipped into the back of the room.
“There is nothing we can do about it,” the queen stated calmly.
Lochlan ran a hand through his hair. “So, my uncle is allowed to just welcome the prisoners into Iskalt?”
Prisoners?
Eamon held up a hand. “Your Majesty, we have company. Maybe this is a discussion for another time.”
All eyes fell on Brea, and she wished she’d just gone into the city on her own.
“Dear.” Tierney rushed toward her. “Good morning.” Her kind smile relaxed Brea’s nerves. “What brings you to the throne room so early?”
“Um… I wanted to see if you’d like to go into the city today.”
“Oh, darling, I would love to, but I have appointments most of the day.”
“Oh. Okay.” Brea’s good mood plummeted. “I can just go by myself then. That’s not a problem.”
“Nonsense.” Her face brightened. “Lochlan will take you.” She clapped her hands together like it was a grand idea.
Brea looked to Lochlan, who’d jerked his gaze their way upon hearing his name. She’d avoided him outside of training, and his dark look told her he had no interest in going into the city today.
“That’s okay. He doesn’t have to.”
“Nonsense, Brea.” She looked to her wife across the room. “Faolan, can you spare Loch for the day?”
Faolan slumped on her throne, looking exhausted despite it being early in the day. “Well, there is little we can do on this matter. Lochlan is all yours.”
They traded him like he had no say, but he probably didn’t. As a ward of this palace, he probably obeyed the queen in anything.
Lochlan grumbled something under his breath and walked toward the door. “All right, Brea, let’s go.”
Brea ran after him, struggling to match his pace. “Really, you don’t have to. I know spending time with me isn’t high on your priority list.”
He stopped walking, not turning to her. “Why would you say such a silly thing?”
She shrugged.
“Brea, we train every afternoon and evening. I’m not the one who has been avoiding you outside of that.”
“I haven’t—okay, I have. I just feel super weird that you know all these things about me, but also I—”
“Like it.”
“Yeah. I mean no. I mean… I don’t know. I feel…protected? That’s probably not the right word. I know you were only there on orders from the queen, but I like thinking I wasn’t alone at some of the worst times.”
Lochlan started walking again, still not looking at her. “I was ordered to go to the human world once a year, Brea, but I was there much more than that.” His voice was low as if he couldn’t believe the words he said.
A smile spread across her face, bringing back the happiness she’d felt in her room earlier. “Okay.”
Opting not to have any of the guards fetch horses, they walked down the long road from the palace to the great city beyond. Brea buzzed with excitement the closer they got.
“I know you do not read,” Lochlan started. “But I’d like to visit the bookshop while we’re here.”
“Oh good. I want to see Fiona anyway.”
“How do you know Fiona?” He looked sideways at her.
“She’s my friend.”
His brow creased. “Oh, right. She comes to the palace to take care of the library. Stay close to me today. This city can be dangerous and is very crowded the closer we get to the market.” As they entered the city streets, he pointed out shops and landmarks as if she’d never been there before.
It took her a while to realize he didn’t think she had. She bit back a grin and nodded along with his explanations for everything they saw.
Outside his tavern, Xander swept the walkway, his large shoulders hunched forward.
Forgetting Lochlan by her side, Brea shouted, “Xander!”
The burly man looked up, a grin spread across his face. “Well, if it isn’t our Fargelsian princess.”
She ran across the road, narrowly missing being hit by a cart carrying casks. She threw her arms around Xander, realizing how much she’d missed being with anyone who didn’t treat her like a royal.
He laughed and patted her back.
A cough cleared behind them, but Brea ignored Lochlan as someone appeared in the doorway of the tavern.
Adamina squealed when she saw her, and the two girls ran into each other’s arms. “It’s been weeks.” Adamina squeezed her.
“Can’t breathe, Mina.” Brea laughed as she stepped back from the girl.
“Sir Lochlan.” Xander’s eyes widened as he finally took notice of Lochlan. “Welcome.”
“Xander.” Lochlan inclined his head. Of course he’d know the tavern owner.
Leaving the men outside, Adamina pulled Brea through the door. “I just made some Eldur Brew. It’s like I knew I’d get a visit from a princess today.”
“Please don’t call me that.”
Adamina giggled. “Why didn’t you tell us? We just thought you were an escaped Fargelsian noble, not the princess.”
Brea shrugged and dropped into a chair. “Reasons.”
Adamina shook her head and walked back into the kitchen. Xander and Lochlan walked in, both stiff with discomfort. Lochlan had that effect on people.
Brea patted the chair beside her. “Relax. It’ll be good for you.”
He sat beside her, his eyes traveling over her face. “How is it that the people in this city are so infatuated with you?” He leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table. “I’m not sure you even noticed how many Eldurians waved to us on the way here. They love you. Why?”
“They don’t love me,” she scoffed. She’d never been the lovable type. In school, the kids made fun of her, despised her.
He sat back, his eyes never leaving her. “What am I missing?”
Adamina returned with two steaming mugs. She set them on the table. “Eldur Brew, coming up.”
Brea brought the cup to her lips and inhaled with a sigh. The brew burned her tongue, but she didn’t care.
“Eldur Brew?” Lochlan stared at his cup in disgust. “Put it down, Brea. That’s not a drink suitable for a princess.”
“Don’t be such a snob.”
He looked to Adamina. “You serve her a commoner’s drink?”
Brea set her mug down and stared daggers at him. “Don’t be a douche.”
“See, I knew it was an insult!”
“Fine. Yes, douchey means obnoxious.” She raised a brow. “Offensive.”
He met her gaze, his voice dropping. “That is how you see me?”
“Sometimes, yes.” She stood, sending an apologetic smile to Adamina and Xander who watched on in fascination.
“What are you doing?” Lochlan asked.
She rounded his chair and put her hands on his shoulders. “Relax, Loch. No one here is watching you or judging you. We aren’t surrounded by gilded palace halls. No one here wears a crown.” Her hands slid down his arms, and she squeezed. “Now, pick up the drink that Xander and Mina have graciously provided. Take a sip because drinks do not have class distinctions.”
She released him, fully expecting him to shove the mug away like the petulant child he could be. Instead, he lifted it, staring into the dark liquid before tilting the cup against his lips.
Brea moved to stand beside Adamina, and they waited in anticipation.
Lochlan set the mug down, a crease between his brows. “That tasted pleasing.”
“Pleasing?” Brea yelled. “Seriously? At least tell me I was right?”
He smirked. “I do not think you can handle that.”
She laughed. “Well, for your information, my mother enjoys Eldur Brew. Take that for it being a commoner’s drink.”
His brows shot toward his hairline. “The q—” He caught himself, throwing a look toward the tavern owner and his daughter. “That is quite strange—even for a Fargelsian.”
Xander and Adamina joined them at their table until they needed to finish preparations to open for the noonday meal.
By the time Lochlan led Brea back into the street, he’d had three cups of Eldur Brew, but she wouldn’t point that out. A small smile played on her lips as she greeted shopkeepers by name. They smiled when they saw her, and a few tried to bow.
Brea spent a lot of time among these people to distract herself from worrying about Lochlan and Finn when they were gone. Now, with Lochlan by her side, it felt more complete. She was still using the city to forget her constant fears, but in that, she and Lochlan were together.
They sauntered through the market, bumping shoulders as the crowd jostled them. “Myles would love this place.” She grinned. “So full of life, so vibrant.”
“I’ve never thought of Raudur City in such a way. My duties at the palace and abroad kept me too busy to spend much time dwelling on it.”
“Well, maybe you should start. I know you’re an Iskalt prince or whatever, but Loch, you grew up here. These people are yours.”
“And yours.”
She looked away, concealing a smile at the thought. The people of Eldur had a fierce pride in their kingdom, and she was a part of that.
They left the market behind, still walking in step with each other. Brea had waited to ask about what she’d heard, but she couldn’t any longer. “What were you arguing about in the throne room this morning?”
“It’s not important.” He rubbed the back of his neck.
“It sounded important. Something about prisoners.”
A sigh pushed past his lips. “Have you been told of the fourth realm of the fae?”
She nodded.
“It is the prison realm, spelled to protect the rest of the fae from its dangers. No one ever escaped… until now. There are now prisoners living in Iskalt, and my uncle has given them places in the army, an army that was an honor to serve when my parents ruled the kingdom. It was the most noble fighting force in all of faedom. Now, it is another in a long line of Iskalt traditions I have to watch my uncle burn to the ground.”
Brea glanced down to where his fists clenched at his sides and reached for one of them. She pried his hand open and held onto it for just a moment before releasing him. “I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how difficult it is to lose your parents and then your kingdom.”
He stopped walking and stared down at her. “My parents died for a noble cause, Brea. I will not take that from them by wishing it was not so.” She wanted to ask if that noble cause was her, but held the question back, unsure if the answer would hurt her more or help her understand.
Lochlan continued. “One day, I will reclaim what is rightfully mine. And then you and I can repair the damage that has been wrought on our world.” He turned to walk into the bookshop.
Brea ran after him. “Me? What do I have to do with it?”
He froze inside the door. “You, Brea Robinson, will be the queen of Eldur.”
Her jaw dropped open, and the magic froze in her veins, threatening to shatter her like an icicle crashing into the ground. Queen? No. That wasn’t the deal. “But I don’t even want to be a princess,” she whispered.
Before she got a chance to ask any questions, Fiona swept in, brushing right by Lochlan to wrap Brea in a hug. “Lochlan O’Shea, what did you do to the girl? She looks as white as an Iskalt winter.”
He shrugged as if he truly had no idea why she suddenly couldn’t speak. Fear, but also anger, curled inside her, but she breathed deeply, using the mental exercises Lochlan taught her to control the emotions—and therefor control the magic. It did no one any good if she wrecked Fiona’s shop.
“You’re okay, dear.” Fiona rubbed her back as she guided her farther into the store.
She should have known Eldur wanted her for the same reason as Fargelsi. They needed an heir, one with magic. It made so much sense. Alona couldn’t inherit the throne because she had no power, hadn’t they told her that a few times already? How had she not put it together?
Faolan didn’t want to bring her daughter back to get to know her. She needed Brea the same way Regan had.
Brea’s breaths came in short gasps as she did everything she could to control her magic.
“Lochlan,” Fiona hissed. “What happened?”
“I told her something she didn’t want to hear.” He sounded so nonchalant as if he hadn’t just pulled a “you’re a wizard, Harry” on her. Only, she already knew about the magic. She wasn’t just a wizard. More like a wizard-queen.
How ridiculous was that?
Her magic snapped inside her as she gained full control and marched toward where Lochlan thumbed through books on a shelf.
Pushing her hand out in front of her, she forced Lochlan against the shelf. It rattled from the impact, and a book teetered before falling on him. He tried to pick it up.
“Don’t move,” she growled.
“Calm down, Brea. Rein in the magic. Control the emotions.”
Her jaw clenched. “I am controlling it, and I don’t want to rein it in. You listen to me, Lochlan O’Shea. I am no one’s pawn. You fae-people watch me my entire life after abandoning me to a world I didn’t belong in. You trade me between kingdoms like a prize. I might have Fargelsian royal blood and Eldurian royal blood, but I am still Brea Robinson of Ohio. And I will make my own blasted choices.”
He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. “You’re going to make an amazing fire queen.”
Pulling her magic back in, she released him and turned before striding out the door. It wasn’t Lochlan’s fault people kept things from her, or that she was in this situation in the first place. If it wasn’t for him, she doubted anyone would be honest with her.
No, there was someone else who needed to hear what she had to say.