**Chapter Fifteen**
It’s the night of the party while Dillon and Cameron waited outside with me. I was pacing around outside the 9th hall waiting for Keegan to show up. If he even would. My fear was that he wouldn’t, and I’d be stood up, but we were trying to think positively. I was still nervous for him to come and didn’t know how this night would turn out. It could be great and be something I would remember for a long time. However, it was so much more to it than just seeing Keegan.
After Julie and Drew’s fight yesterday, things in our group have been quite dysfunctional. Drew was missing as per usual and Julie took a different approach to things. As soon as we got to the party, she immediately made a B-Line for the drinks. Who knew giving someone a hat would stress her out so much? It’s safe to say I needed to take the hat back from Drew, but he seemed to like it so much. Though, it was for the betterment of the group.
Continuing my pacing, Dillon laughed as she watched me act so nervously. “Anna, relax, he’s going to show up.” She tried to console me.
I nod, still feeling nervous. “What if he doesn’t, though? What if he got lost? Or just don’t want to come to some stupid college party.” Keegan was only 21, but college might not be for him.
“He wouldn’t have asked for an invitation if he didn’t want to come,” Cameron reminded me. “Just relax. I’m sure he’ll be here any second.”
I wanted to take Cameron’s advice, but time was ticking. Keegan was nowhere to be seen, and I didn’t get even a text from him. I was thinking he would not show up. It made me sad because he sounded so sweet over the phone. The least he could’ve done was tell me he couldn’t make it. We could reschedule and move on. But nope, instead he opted to not show up and not inform me. This night already sucked.
Since Keegan didn’t show, I wasted no time following Julie’s approach, grabbing whatever it was to drink. I chugged it, grabbing another right after. The annoyance I felt from him not showing up drove me mad. How could you stand someone up like that? He didn’t even have the common decency to let me know ahead of time. Now I felt like an idiot.
Dillon watched me with concern on her face. This behavior wasn’t like me. “Anna, slow down there,” she suggested, taking the third cup I picked up from me.
I shrug. “What? I’m fine, anyone wants to dance? Let’s dance!” Anything to distract me.
Before we could do that, Cameron’s mystery girl finally appeared and, honestly, she was gorgeous. Her pretty red hair cascaded down her back. She had these light brown eyes that were round and big. If this were a fairytale, she’d be the princess. It amazes me how Drew and Cam found these really gorgeous girls. Who were just that, girls? Your typical, I love pink, girls. That could be why guys stand me up. I’m not girly enough.
Regardless, I was excited to meet her and so was Dillon. She didn’t seem like she’d want to hang out with our gang of people, but the right fit for Cameron. He wasn’t kidding when he said she was shy. I thought I was bad. Kayla took it to a whole other level. She made me look like an extrovert.
Cameron couldn’t help the smile on his face as he hugged her tightly. “Dillon, Anna, this is Kayla!” He yelled over the music.
Dillon and I both smile. “The Kayla, we’ve heard so much about you,” Dillon spoke first.
“I’m so happy you swept up our little Cammy Cam,” I had to tease him just a little.
Kayla smiled before looking down at the ground. “Um, hi,” was all she said with a nervous wave.
Dillon and I didn’t want to pressure her too much. She was 100 percent the shy type. It’ll take some time for her to get used to us being around. In the meantime, Cameron went off to find the others to introduce her to. While Dillon and I made our way to the dance floor. There we found Julie, who looked to be on her 5th drink. I wanted to be where she was. Forgetting Keegan was supposed to even come here. I told her what happened, and she handed me another cup as we danced.
Eventually, Dre, Cameron, and Kayla came to join us while Drew was nowhere to be found. It’s very typical of Drew to be missing. I’m guessing his way of coping was being alone. Though I didn’t see how that would bring him any solace. He should be with us partying and having a good time. Instead, he wasn’t. That made me worry about him. So much so that I needed to take a break outside.
Exiting the hall, I made my way outside with another drink in my hand, thinking about where Drew could be. There were so many options I could think of. He could be in his dorm, in his car, maybe even where he took me a few days ago. The option was endless. My main concern was that he was ok.
Just then, I hear Dre come out, sitting next to me on the steps. He looked like he had a few drinks himself, but he stayed calm. What he was mainly doing was checking on me. Dre and I had never had much of a conversation alone before, but he was always nice to me growing up. That was all I could’ve asked of anyone back then.
Nudging me, Dre smiled. “What are you doing out here, girl? The parties in there,” he said with his cheerful attitude, like always.
I smile. “I know, I just needed some air, and…I’ve been wondering about Drew,” I admit to him. “Do you know if he’s ok?”
Dre nodded, getting my sentiments. “Yeah, I’m sure he’s fine. The fight got a lot more heated than he expected.” He tells me before looking at me curiously. “Anna, will you be honest with me?”
That confused me, but I didn’t see why I couldn’t. “Uh, yeah, but why?” I wondered.
He sighed before looking back at me. “Do you like Drew?” That shocked me.
Averting my eyes, I didn’t know if I should be honest about this question. This was Drew’s best friend we’re talking to here. If I told him, would he go back and tell Drew? Also, he knows he’s dating Juliana. What would it look like for me to have a crush on him knowing he’s dating Juliana? But I’ve also liked him for so long. Getting it off my chest could be a good thing.
My leg shakes violently, debating in my head if I should answer that. “I…I guess I do,” I say nervously.
“You guess? Anna, that’s not a sure answer,” He said. “You can tell me, it’s ok.”
I sighed. “Yes, I do and have for so long,” I admit. “But I’m trying to get over him and if Keegan had showed up, I probably could have.”
Dre looked at me, bewildered. “Is it necessary to get over him?” He asked me. He was really digging for answers.
For me, it was necessary. Drew has clarified that he only sees me as a friend. We would never be more than we were. Which, in hindsight, was fine. So long as we were friends, my feelings for him didn’t seem to want to go away. Anytime he was around, all I wanted to do was hug him. Be near him, close to him even. The kindness he’s always giving me left a mark that I could never forget. It was hard, but I would do it.
There was that, and there was Juliana as well. I never imagined we would become friends in any capacity. Despite having this crush on Drew for as long as I did, it wasn’t fair to Julie. We were friends and I didn’t want to betray her like that. It’s just hard getting over someone you’ve liked for so long. I doubt she would understand that.
Explaining all that to Dre, he understood, but still asked me questions. “How long have you liked him? Why haven’t you told him sooner?”
I smirk to myself. “I started having a crush on him in 8th grade, but it was the year prior that started it all,” I explain.
Dre was all ears as I explained to him what had happened. I used to get bullied a lot back in middle school. I never quite figured out the reason. People just wanted to pick on me, I guess. They used to call me Annabelle Pig or Piggy. I was told my hair was ugly, my face was disgusting, and I was too quiet to be normal. Dillon couldn’t do much about the bullying, but she did always try. Unfortunately, on this one particular day, they cornered me. Screaming and pulling my hair that my name was so ugly. They even called me Piggy Lee. There wasn’t anything for me to do besides crouching down and crying. That is until Drew showed up.
Drew and Dre were the most popular guys in middle school and high school. Everyone in both schools looked up to them like they were some sort of gods. So when the kids who were teasing me saw him walk over, they immediately stopped. I remember him coming down to my level, wiping my tears, and telling me how much he loved my name. He said loud enough for everyone to hear, too. Since that moment, everyone stopped bullying me and I didn’t have to deal with it in high school either. Something so small, yet so meaningful.
I laugh. “It’s silly, but Drew became someone idolized all throughout my 7th-grade tenure. I was afraid for you guys to leave because I thought they’d bully me again. But I was friends with his sister, so they were probably worried she’d tell him.”
Dre laughed, nodding his head. “I think I remember that day, too. They were really going after you.”
“Yeah, but he saved me, and then the next year I realized I liked him but could be with him.” I smiled half-heartedly.
Dre didn’t agree with me. “Well, you never told him, Anna. He couldn’t know unless you spoke up.”
“That’s true, but by the time I came to the high school, he was already dating Juliana. As much as I pined over him, I also wanted to make myself invisible.” That was true.
Though Dre was right. I couldn’t have expected him to like me back if I never talked to him. The worry that he would reject me scared me a lot more than telling him I had a crush. He was somebody back in high school, while I was a nobody. My only friend at the time was Dillon and even she had others she would sometimes hang out with. Why on earth would Drew ever be caught dead with someone like me? We weren’t even in the same stratosphere.
Dre listened better than I thought he would. “Luck just wasn’t on your side,” He said sadly.
I laughed. “You could say that,” I say.
He stood up, getting the picture. “Listen, I will not tell you to pursue it or get over it.” He says calmly. “But if you choose to get over him, don’t use another guy to do it, ok?”
That was solid advice from a great guy. I guess I would have been using Keegan to get over Drew. It wouldn’t have been a good look, but I also was interested in him. It’s a weird situation that I got myself into. It’s possible my feelings for Drew wouldn’t have vanished, even if I dealt with Keegan. Then what would I have done? Date a guy while liking another. That wouldn’t have worked out well. Either way, I hope Drew was ok.