"Chloe, I will take care of you and that baby no matter what." She says honestly.
"-But it isn't your responsibility." I sighed.
"As long as you're with me I'll be by your side," Hayley sa holding my stare.
"The last person who told me that is currently in a coma." I bitterly joked.
"Well I won't I'm fine," Hayley reassured.
What she doesn’t understand is that she isn’t fine; neither of us is.
"Until they realize I'm alive and track me down." my face turned into a frown
"But they won't." trying to find the positive side to this situation, which is just making me more angry.
I took a breath as I tried to explain my point,
"Yes, they will, especially when I make my move."
"Wait, you're still on that, I figured you would have given up on that when you found out you were pregnant." Hayley rolled her eyes.
“This could kill him, Hayley, no Lucey killed him this is all Allistaire’s fault. They deserve to die, and I am going to do it.” I felt my stomach churning, the fact they are still out there makes me sick.
I clenched my fists picking up a pile of rock, feeling the dirt and grit between my fingernails.
Hayley’s gray eyes went wide as she noticed the disgust in my voice, she threw her hands onto the top of her head and paced for a moment before she faced me again.
“Why don’t we just get the police involved, why are you being so-so ridiculous?” she exclaimed.
“-Because it’s not enough! They deserve to feel the same pain we felt!” I screamed back getting
up off the hot asphalt.
“You need to think clearly about this Chloe, you have no skills and be mad if you want but I don’t even think you have it in you to kill anyone!” She yelled incredulously.
I ran towards her took Hayley by the hair pulling her head back, I quickly slid a pocket knife from my belt clicked it open, pushing the blade against her neck, not even giving her time to take a breath.
“Don’t tempt me, there's a lot of things you wouldn't believe I’m capable of,” I spoke through gritted teeth.
Hayley swallowed hard against the blade, teary-eyed and scared, I could feel her breath on my face as she figured out what to do next but I didn’t see this coming, she pulled my face to hers and kissed me deeply, I immediately pushed her off of me.
“What the hell!” I yelled.
“I-I’m so sorry, I just,-”
“If you don’t want to help me that’s fine, don’t. But I’m doing this regardless so either you come with me or you go home.” I snapped.
I spun away from her walking away down the gravel road.
“Where are you going?” She cried after me.
“To get a gun,” I say unsatisfied
Maybe it was best for her to stay out of my life, at least she would be safe but how dare she kiss me?
“I just don’t think this is the right way to do this.” She stuttered.
I threw my hands up in the air frustrated,
“I don’t think there is any other way, you know what I think you should go home, Hayley. I involved you enough, and the fact you just kissed me tells me I have to leave,”
“I’m sorry, Chloe can’t we just go home and talk about this, please?” She pleaded.
“I don’t know what that’s going to do,” I yelled back not turning around.
I heard Hayley run to her car and start the engine driving beside me and put down her window to continue our conversation.
“Okay fine, we can go get the gun, but we are going home after that, you need to rest.” Hayley gave in taking a glance at my stomach.
Closing my eyes in annoyance, I stopped,
“Only if you don’t kiss me again.”
I didn’t look at her, I know I’m hurting her but what she did wasn’t right.
“Okay I promise, I’m sorry.” Her voice cracked as she sniffled back tears.
Hayley stopped the car and I ran to the passenger's side, the door handle screeched open as I got in closing it again behind me.
“Is there like a gun shop or something around here?” Looking in the side mirrors nervously, I took a deep breath.
“No, but I have friends who have guns. A handgun is all we really need right?” She asks.
Hayley began to look through her contacts on her phone as we slowly cruised down the road.
“Yeah that should be fine,” I took a cigarette out of my pack in the glove box.
I lit the tip making a sizzling sound as it cracked and burned taking a long inhale.
"Okay, I'll call him and then we can get going." She dialed a number on the touch screen of her phone.
I didn't reply to her agreement I just sat and stared out the open window, watching the smoke burn off, I took another puff.
When she says she'd help me and always be there for me to only try and be with me?
She's my best friend, but I love Colby and that's never going to change.
I took another deep inhale as the ashes got longer, putting my hand out the window and flicking the ashes away.
"Hey, Jason?" Says Hayley.
I couldn't hear his voice because of the wind blowing through the open window as well as my hair around my face.
"I'm coming over to pick up something, I'll explain more when I see you face to face." She says loud over the wind.
Again I heard nothing as Hayley paused before speaking again.
"Okay see you soon." She says before she hangs up.
"Why didn't you just tell him what we needed?" I say bored.
Hayley looked at me with a joking look on her face.
"If I tell Jason what we are doing he won't give me the gun." She replied.
"Oh," I say taking the final puff before throwing the cigarette out the window as I rolled it up.
Hayley sighed as she noticed that I was being overly quiet, I know she feels guilty for kissing me, but I just don't feel right about it.
I don't know what to think right now everything is beginning to melt together.
"Chloe, I'm sorry." She says as tears filled her eyes.
"I know," I say simply still watching the trees and small houses we pass by.
She tightened the grip on the steering will as she shifted her weight.
"You do?" She sniffled.
I didn't dare look at her, not because I didn't care but the fact that I'm about to cry too, and I think I've done enough crying for the past month.
“Yes, as I said earlier just don’t do it again,” I explained, finally looking over to see her face she swallowed hard as she nodded in understanding.
I placed my hand on my stomach as a small bump protruded the baby inside me is growing I just thought I was gaining weight but now I know its the baby is growing, which means I only have eight months to get everything organized and save money.
“What should we call the baby?” I asked about changing the subject.
I continued to caress my stomach, I wonder if this tiny little thing can feel my hand on my stomach.
“I don’t know, what do you want to call it?” She asked giving me a side glance.
Sitting here I thought for a moment.
“How about if its a boy I name him Zayne, and for a girl, I will call her Jade?” I say proudly.
“Those are interesting names,” She agreed with a nod. “Sounds good to me.” She added.
“Jade and Zayne it is then.” I finally decided.
Hayley gave me a small smile as she continued to drive, I took the silence the rest of the way to Jason’s to think about what he or she would look like.
With my brown hair and blue eyes and Colby’s black hair and green eyes, I can see our child having dark brunette hair and blue with a hint of green.
I zoned out imagining a little boy with Colby's looks and my eyes prancing in a field of flowers as he runs to a park to play with his father as Colby chases after him.
It's like I can actually hear the boys laughter as he races to the playground to see who can get there first.
My face ached from smiling so big until I felt someone shake me out of my fantasy.
"Chloe, we are here." Hayley said with a sigh.
I realized we were in front of a small barn and a fence that held in chickens.
"Here, where?" I asked if I didn't see any houses.
"At Jason's farm, have you been listening to me at all?" Hayley asked, rolling her eyes.
I shied away from her, I knew she will make fun of me if I told her what had been running through my mind.